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Winner Fakes All/Transcript
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This is the transcript of the Sonic Underground episode 'Winner Fakes All'.

Queen Aleena: (Narrating) We all feel proud of our special abilities and accomplishments. Too much pride can be a terrible trap.
Dr. Robotnik: Another load of formerly free citizens on their way to be roboticized. I can hardly wait! (Laughs dramatically).
[Cuts to Manic.]
Manic: Man, I never thought I'd do a gig working on trucks! Manic the mechanic... Whoa! That really blew his mind!
Dr. Robotnik: What's wrong with that truck bot? Someone's hijacking my prisoners! STOP THEM!
Sonic: Get that truck of Robotnik's faster!
Manic: What are you worried about? ...Whoa!!!
[The speed of the truck increases, and with Manic tagging along via a rope, the rope snaps and Manic blows away whilst on his hover-board.]
Sonia: Uh uh, Swatbots!
[A dozen of swatbots appear in front of them.]
Sonic: (Gasps)
Sonia: I don't think so!
[Sonia unleashes her keyboard, and blasts a swatbot.]
Manic: Who's driving the truck?
[Sonic pushes the Truckbot from behind, as the truck comes forward, it destroys the swatbots in its path.]
Sonia: Sonic, look out!
[A pram was parked in the middle of the path, so Sonic lets go of the truck to move the pram out of the way.]
Sonic: Your parents should be more... Huh?!
[Sleet stands up from the pram wearing a baby bonnet and points a laser pistol at Sonic’s face.]
Sleet: Careful?
Sonic: Whoa! What an ugly baby.
[Sonic dashes straight into Sleet, tripping him over.]
[Sonic held onto the pram, which was moving on its own because it was really Dingo in disguise.]
Dingo: Fooled ya again!
Sonic: Dingo?
[Sonic dashes in circles countless times and then throws Dingo into the air.]
Sonic: Watch out! One defected baby carriage comin' at 'ya!
[Sleet points his pistol at Sonic while he is distracted...]
Sleet: I've got him this time!
[But then, Dingo lands on top of Sleet and crushes him. The camera cuts to Sonia, Manic, and the swatbots. Sonia gasps as a flying Swatbot chips a part of the wall. Sonic quickly makes his way back to battle.]
Sonic: This way, Manic!
[Sonic turns right. Manic steers Truckbot to the right and follows Sonic. Soon, they pass through a barrier into a subway tunnel, with Manic breaking through the barrier with the truck. Some of the Swatbots walk into the area, but they stop and look around.]

[Scene Change: Subway]

[The Truckbot stops.]
Sonic: Good work, sis! Way to cruise and bruise!
[The hedgehogs stand next to Sonic, with Sonia still holding her keyboard weapon.]
Sonia: Ungh. I'll have to blast the door open to let the prisoners out.
Sonic: Put that blast in the past, sis. I got that covered!
[Sonic turns into a tornado and slices through the sides of Truckbot.]
Manic: Poor Dudes. Robotnik's already gotten them in prison uniforms.
[The prisoners jump off the truck.]
Sonia: Those aren't prison uniforms.
[They dash.]
Sonia: It looks like a track meet.
Sonic: Why would Robotnik want to roboticize a track meet?!

[Scene Change: Robotropolis]

Robotnik: For weeks I've been roboticizing the fastest mobians I could find, in order to create the key-- to capturing Sonic.
[--Robotnik connects his remote signal to a pulley which winds a rope attached to a large blanket. The blanket reveals a turtle-shaped robot.]
Robotnik: Behold, the Speed-Bot!
Sleet: Is it as fast as Sonic?
Robotnik: Nothing is as fast as Sonic. The Speed-Bot is only bait for the trap.
[He puts a video cassette into the video player.]
Robotnik: Just watch.
[The screen fuzzes and turns on. Robotnik appears.]
Robotnik: [On Video] Citizens of Mobius, to prove that he's the fastest being on the planet, my Speed-Bots will race old challengers! The winner will receive a big big prize.
[The screen fuzzes and turns off.]
Robotnik: And a big surprise. [Looks at Sleet and Dingo]Did I look alright? [Looks worried] They say television adds ten pounds to you.
Sleet: You look fabulous, your evil-ness, and may I say it's a brilliant plan. They’ll never suspect the race is a trap.
Dingo: You mean, it's a trap?
Sleet: Well, perhaps Sonic would suspect. He's not Dingo, after all.
Robotnik: Of course Sonic will know it's a trap. But he's so proud of his speed that he won't be able to resist the challenge. [Laughs Maniacally.]

[Scene Change: Outside]

[Sonia plays a tune on her keyboard.]
Sonia: [Just as drumming sounds] I think this part should go more like...
[Manic continues banging the drums to Sonia's annoyance.]
Sonia: I'm talking to you, Manic. [Screams] Manic!
[Manic eventually stops.]
Manic: [Confidently] Hey! How about a drum solo in this number. Cool, huh?
[Manic continues banging the drums. Sonic arrives at the scene.]
Sonic: Hey, I just heard Butt-nik's challenged all comers to race his new Speed-Bot.
Sonia: [Runs annoyed and pushes Sonic aside.] Yeah right. It's a trap!
[The drumming pauses.]
Manic: [Quickly] Uh, she's right, bro. It's a trap.
[The drumming continues for a brief moment. Sonic zooms next to Sonia.]
Sonic: Take a chill pill, sis. I know it's a trap. But if Robotnik thinks he can make a robot faster than me?! [Scoffs]
Sonia: If you want to walk into a trap just to prove how fast you are, [Angrily] don't expect me and Manic to come save you!
[She storms off. Sonic grunts, taps his foot and engages in his combat pose.]

[Scene Change]

[The Camper Van door opens. Sonic jumps out.]
Sonic: Buttnik's never thought of a trap that can catch me. I'll show him who's fast, and who's last.
[He peels out, creating a trail of fire.]

[Scene Change: Inside the Camper Van, sunrise]

[Sonia and Manic are trying to sleep but are disturbed by a snoring noise. Manic raises his head from under the pillow.]
Manic: Oh man. Stop snoring! Or at least find a better rhythm.
[Sonia pulls her bed cover, appearing with an entirely white look on her face.]
Sonia: [Angrily] If I have dark circles under my eyes, somebody's gonna pay! [Normally] Wake up and go back to sleep.
[She pulls the final bed cover out. It is revealed to not be Sonic, but a saw attached to a motor sawing a log.]
Sonia: He's gone!
Manic: He's gonna have sawed up in his bed too.
Sonia: I knew it. He's gone to enter that race. How could he do anything that dumb? We got to stop him!
[She runs and leaves Manic, whom realizes something.]
Manic: Hey! Wait a mobius minute! I thought you said if he walked into a trap you weren't gonna help him.
[She uses the salon machine on her face. Her normal colors are restored.]
Sonia: [While looking at herself in the mirror] You always mean everything you say?
Manic: Well, yeah.

[Scene Change]

[Sonic zooms around the place. He soon stops and starts thinking.]
Sonic: Hmm... If I'm gonna enter that race, I'll need a disguise. Where would I go to change the way I look?
[A whistling noise sounds. Sonic looks at a building with giant screen, which shows different Mobians wearing different hair styles.]
Sonic: A Beauty Salon! Just the place to borrow a disguise.

[Scene Change: Beauty Salon]

[Bartleby is having his hair done by a professional hairdresser.]
Bartleby: I want to look my best, today. I'm going to the race, you see.
[Sonic zooms across the room, spinning Bartleby's chair, grabbing yellow hair off another mobian - making her gasp - and taking all the make-up off the next mobian - who is putting lip balm on her lips - and spinning her chair, making her dizzy and go cross-eyed. The camera cuts to Bartleby in his spinning chair. Sonic spins his chair again, making his hair grow to the shape of a palm tree, to his hairdresser's shock.]

[Scene Change]

[Sonic returns outside holding a wide collection of disguise equipment.]
Sonic: These should do it. Now, for a quick makeover.
[He spins on an axis. He makes over and shows his new look - A blonde wig, eyelashes, lipstick and purple dress.]
Sonic: My own mom wouldn't recognize me disguised like this, but Buttnik might. I'd better test it.
[He zooms off. He stands next to a Swatbot and taps its knee. The bot bends down to look at him.]
Sonic: [Woman's voice] Excuse me, Mr. Swatbot.--
[--Camera cuts to Swatbot's view, the screen filters to green.]
Sonic: Can you tell me if I'm a dangerous member of the anti-Ro-buttnik underground?
[The text "SCANNING MODE" flashes. Swatbot scans Sonic from top to bottom.]
Swatbot: [Monotone] I am unable to identify you.
Sonic: Cool!
[He zooms off. He stops when he hears somebody scream.]
Mobian: Heeelp!
[A Swatbot is walking carrying a small rat-shaped Mobian by the head.]
Mobian: I'm just a kid. Gimme a break!
Swatbot: Innocent. He's against the law.
[Sonic turns into a tornado, removing his disguise in the process. The tornado jumps and catches the Mobian off the Swatbot's hand and takes him to a safe place.]
Sonic: You can talk now. Gotta run!
[He peels out and zooms into a figure of eight around two Swatbots, which fire lasers in different directions. He stops in between the two and whistle calls.]
Sonic: Hey you!
[The two Swatbots turn to him. He shrugs shoulders and runs off. The Swatbots open fire and explode themselves. Sonic zooms back into the scene and looks at the debris.]
Sonic: Nice shootin', guys!
[Suddenly, he is grabbed by another Swatbot from behind, who brings him up to its level.]
Swatbot: Identification confirmed. You are Sonic the Hedgehog.
Sonic: ...And you're history, bot-head!
[He peels out while trapped in the Robot's hand. The robot is spun around repeatedly into a blue tornado. All the robot parts come off, except for its arm, which Sonic is still trapped into.]
Sonic: Phew.
[The robot hand comes off.]
Sonic: Something tells me a disguise just won't juice it. I can stop looking like myself. I can't stop acting like myself.
[He zooms and collects all the makeover equipment. Afterwards, he stops.]
Sonic: I guess Sonia was right about that race, and I was wrong. [Looks at the viewer] Whoa. Did I say that?
[He zooms off.]

[Scene Change]

[He zooms, creating a trail of fire, back to his Camper Van, opens the door and has a look around the inside.]
Sonic: Anybody home? Hmm... Must have run out for some black market sheet music.
[He sits on a chair and touches his medallion which generates his guitar.]
Sonic: Good time to nail some new tunes.
[He strums the guitar.]

[Scene Change: Stadium, Dusk]

[Swatbots patrol the skies towards the stadium in their flying vehicles. They are alongside a tank which drives at the same speed. They arrive and park outside the stadium. Sleet, Dingo, and Robotnik walk across the aisle with applause from the villagers.]
Robotnik: [Snickers] These fools will clap even louder when Sonic is captured and the resistance destroyed. Keep a sharp lookout. Don't let Sonic slip through your fingers.
[Dingo stops and checks his fingers.]
Dingo: I'll get him. These fingers are pretty sticky.
[Sleet cuts in.]
Sleet: Come on, you free bream!
[Sleet grabs Dingo's arm and takes him.]

[Scene Change]

[Sonia - on her motorbike - and Manic - on his hoverboard - arrive outside the stadium, wearing disguises.]
Sonia: How do we get in?
Manic: Peace, okay? They rounded up people in Dumpbots just to fill the stands.
[A Dumpbot parks outside the parking lot. It raises the bed and opens the tailgate. A group of people scream and fall out of the truck. Afterwards, the tailgate closes, the bed lowers and the truck leaves.]
Sonia: You don't expect me to sit in bleachers do you?
[She sees something, gasps and grabs Manic, forcing him and herself to hide behind a car. Manic raises his head.]
Sonia: Get down!
[She pulls Manic's head back inside. She raises her head and looks ahead. She sees Bartleby with a group of people around him.]
Sonia: Bartleby. But who's that woman he's with?
Bartleby: Ah yes. [Laughs.]
Sonia: [Scoffs] And he's having a very good time!
Manic: You sound jealous.
Sonia: [Clearly] I am not jealous! [Normally] Why should I care if Bartleby takes someone else to this stupid race? [Quietly] Now, go get a ticket.
[Manic walks off. The camera cuts to Bartleby.]
Bartleby: I'm-- only here because I was personally invited by Doctor Robotnik. He and I are...
[--Manic walks in and stops between Bartleby and the woman he's talking to, looking at the former.]
Manic: [Interrupting] Uh, excuse me, excuse me, um, coming-- through, coming through.
[--He snatches tickets from inside Bartleby's jacket.]
Bartleby: Commoner.
[Bartleby and his woman walk towards the entrance. A Swatbot stops them and asks for a ticket.]
Swatbot: Your tickets?
[Bartleby feels his jacket but nothing else.]
Bartleby: That's odd.
[He checks inside his jacket.]
Bartleby: I seem to have misplaced our tickets.
Swatbot 2: No tickets?
[Another Swatbot cuts in and grabs him and the woman from behind, making them scream.]
Bartleby: [Angrily] Hey! Put me down!
[Manic gives the tickets to Sonia.]
Sonia: Ooh. A private box?

[Scene Change: Inside the Stadium]

[The camera cuts to the start line. It moves up to the VIP room, where Sonia and Manic are watching from above.]
Sonia: And it's right on the starting line too.
[A vacuum cleans the line.]
Manic: Whoa, we must be right under Robotnik's Sky box.
[He points upward. The camera moves up to where Robotnik and Sleet are placed. While Robotnik watches, Sleet walks over to Dingo, whom is playing a video game.]
Sleet: I'm going to enter you in the race, so you can keep an eye on Sonic.
[Sleet uses his Shapeshift Remote on Dingo. The latter is transformed into a horse.]
Dingo: Huh?!
Sleet: [Thinking] Hmm...Not really you. Not the front half anyway.
[Sleet transforms Dingo again, turning him into a cheetah. Dingo meows and falls to the ground on his chest.]
Sleet: Cheetahs-- are fast, but Sonic might spot you.
[--Sleet transforms him yet again.]
Sleet: There. That should fool Sonic.
[Dingo is revealed to be morphed into a woman with a pink dress and one wheel on the bottom replacing his two legs. He looks at himself. The wheel revs.]
Dingo: Yikes! Right. Hmm... What of Sonic wears a disguise? How will I know it's him?
[Sleet groans and puts his hand over his eyes. He uses his finger to ask Dingo to come along. They move to the balcony outside.]
Sleet: The swatbots have orders to attack the winner of the race.
[A flap from what looks like a concrete barrier opens. A Swatbot walks out.]
Sleet: That's sure to beat Sonic.
[Manic taps on the window with his drumsticks.]
Manic: Sonic's sure to wear a disguise, sis. How are we gonna tell which one's him?
Sonia: [Sat on the back of the chair, with the back facing Manic] Robotnik knows nobody's faster than sonic, [Turns her seat around to face him] so he'll go after the winner; and then we'll rescue him. Simple!

[Scene Change: Stadium]

[Fanfare music plays. A Mobian lines up with a Swatbot, Dingo's girl form, another Mobian and Speed-Bot on the start line. The other mobian expresses his love and attempts to kiss Dingo, but he slaps his face instead, knocking him out.]
Robotnik: [On loudspeaker announcing] Welcome to the first ever Mobius challenge race! The race that will prove who is truly the fastest being on Mobius. [Away from mic] And which one is Sonic in disguise.
[Sleet nods, Robotnik brings out a mobium note.]
Robotnik: I bet you ten thousand mobiums that Sonic is the ugly one in the dress.
[Sleet takes the money.]
Sleet: That's Dingo.
[Robotnik snatches the note off Sleet's hand.]
Robotnik: Ah, too bad we didn't shake hands on it.
[Robotnik snickers and Sleet looks angry and folds his arms.]
Sleet: [Grumbling] Ah, you razzin-frazzin welcher.
[A Referee Robot raises its starting pistol. All the runners are in their crouching position. Dingo revs his motor unicycle with small puffs of smoke coming out from both sides. The gun fires. All the runners takes off, leaving a puff of smoke...]
Robotnik: And they're off!
[...Until the smoke clears, revealing a Swatbot who is still standing in its position. It uses its jetpack and hovers upwards and high out of the stadium. Robotnik watches it in disappointment.]
Robotnik: I had a feeling that wouldn't work.
[The Swatbot explodes like a firework. The camera cuts to the Private Box with Manic and Sonia.]
Manic: [Excitedly] Cool! Fireworks!
[He looks at Sonia, who is looking through her binoculars. The camera cuts to the binoculars view of Speed-Bot.]
Sonia: Robotnik's Speed-Bot is in the lead? Sonic must be playing it real cool!

[Scene Change: Camper Van]

[Inside, Sonic is practicing a tune with his guitar.]
Sonic: Maybe I'll just watch the race.
[Sonic turns the television on with his remote.]
Robotnik: [Commentating] The Speed-Bot is really proving himself to be the fastest being on Mobius.
Sonic: [Fed Up] Hey, no biggie. I know who's really the fastest, and he's a nobody guy.
[Sonic continues watching while strumming. The TV's camera shows crowd cheering, and then his siblings.]
Sonic: [Shocked] Bummer Majores! Sonia and Manic must think I'm at the race! They walked into butt-nik's trap!
[The song, "Built For Speed" plays.]

[Scene Change: Stadium]

[Dingo is now side by side with Speed-Bot. Dingo nudges it three times. Speed-Bot is rolling on two wheels, then flies and breaks a piece of barrier from the racetrack. The camera cuts to Bartleby, surrounded by a group of people.]
Bartleby: I have a private box. I don't belong here!
[A shadow casts over them. The Speed-Bot falls toward them, making the people except for him scream. The Speed-Bot falls onto him. Meanwhile, a robot referee waves its checkered flag. Dingo crosses the line with nobody else around. The camera cuts to Sonia and Manic.]
Sonia: I told you that was Sonic.
[Dingo celebrates by bouncing on his wheel.]
Dingo: Whoopee! Hooray! Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
[He stretches his arms out wide.]
Dingo: I won! I won!
[He is surrounded by Swatbots, making him panic. He wheels away while Swatbots fire at him. He falls off his motor unicycle and bangs into the barrier, making Robotnik upset and Sleet shocked.]
Sleet: That fool Dingo won the race!
[Dingo is cornered into a wall by three swatbots, who move closer to him. He waves his arm in desperation.]
Dingo: No!
[Sonia's motorcycle stops next to Dingo, releasing a puff of smoke. Dingo shakes his hair and looks up.]
Dingo: Huh?
Sonia: Quick! Hop on!
[Dingo jumps onto her motorbike and rides away from the robots as they open fire again. Manic watches the scene. Realizing Sonia's in trouble he unleashes his drum set and bangs the drums. A high-pitched tuning noise can be heard above Manic's private box.]
Robotnik: What the?! Hold your fire!
[Robotnik looks up and then falls his chair, alerting Sleet. They both look up and notice the room crumbling down from above, making them both scream. Meanwhile, Sonia escapes through a vent and down a stairway.]
Sonia: I can stay and violate those Swatbots, can't you? Even in that dress.
Dingo: I didn't know you cared.
Sonia: Of course we care. Yeahoo!
[Sonic peels into the scene and grinds to a halt. The motorbike passes him.]
Sonic: Huh?
[Sonia stops her bike too.]
Sonia: Brother?
Sonic: Chill out, sis! The big bro with the big mo' is here!
[They gather.]
Sonia: If you're Sonic, then who is that?
[Dingo snickers and waves. Manic bangs the drums again. In the private box above him, Robotnik is seen flying around the room screaming. Sleet tries to get up from the quaking and press his Shapeshift Remote, but is collided by Robotnik and breaks through the window glass. Sleet hangs on to the edge of the cliff, with Robotnik holding on to his legs.]
Robotnik: Sleet! Do something!
[Sleet reaches his Shapeshift Remote and activates it on Dingo, morphing him back to normal. He is seen gripping Sonia with his strong arms.]
Dingo: Let's keep riding forever, Sonia.
Sonia: [Straining]
[Manic starts drumming again. Sleet prays while he holds on, with Robotnik hanging on to his cape. Robotnik nearly falls off. Sleet pulls himself successfully up and rolls inside the room again, but the cape swings over and covers his eyes, while the ground still shakes.]
Sleet: Help! I can't see!
[He pulls his cape over his eyes and looks out the window.]
Sleet: Whoops.
[Robotnik is seen falling down the stadium. Manic sees him falling, and stops drumming. While this happens, the camera cuts to Bartleby, whom is stuck in a heap underneath a Mobian and Speed-Bot. He crawls free but the falling Robotnik hits and lands on top of him.]
Robotnik: [Shouting] Stop them, Sleet! Don't let them get away!
[Manic bangs the drums briefly.]
Manic: So much for my solo.
[He returns the drums back inside his medallion. He jumps on his hoverboard and glides away, breaking through the glass, and past Robotnik, whom clenches his fist in anger.]
Robotnik: [Ascending] Ooh I hate hedgehogs!
Sleet: [Shouting on the microphone] Close the gate! Trap him in the stadium!
[The doors around the stadium close. The camera moves down to Dingo still holding Sonia, whom now have a closed door behind them. Sonia is struggling to get out of Dingo's grip.]
Sonia: Stop! Let me go! Ooh! Unhand me!
[Sonia screams and starts pounding on him with her fists to try and break free, but Dingo is completely unharmed.]
Dingo: Now you'll never get away from me.
Sonic: Are you serious? You're so slow, I could get away from you with my eyes closed!
[Sonia stretches down to Sonic's level.]
Sonia: I wouldn't make him mad, Sonic.
Sonic: Take your best shot, while I'm not looking.
[Dingo releases Sonia and roars, making her scream as she falls. Sonic - behind the two adjacent doors - engages in his combat pose. Dingo charges towards him, but Sonic steps aside at the final moment, causing Dingo to hit the area between the doors. He rubs his head as a gap starts to separate the doors.]
Dingo: Ooh. That hurt.
[A shadow casts over him. One of the doors falls down towards him.]
Dingo: Not good.
[Sonic braces himself next to Sonia's motorcycle. The door falls flat. At the same time, Manic arrives with the other two hedgehogs on his hoverboard. He and Sonic give high five]
Sonic: Let's make like a bee and buzz!
[Sonic Spin dashes through the opening and zooms towards a shooting Swatbot. He spins through the robot's chest, causing it to explode. Manic and Sonia speed through the fallen door in their vehicles, treating it as a ramp, hurting Dingo. Dingo rubs his head again.]
Dingo: Sonia. I thought you cared!
[A Swatbot pushes Dingo down with its leg. A group of Swatbots start shooting again, but the hedgehogs zoom out of sight.]

[Scene Change]

[The hedgehogs park in a safe place in the middle of nowhere.]
Sonic: None of this would have happened if I hadn't wanted to prove how fast I am!
[Sonic appears exhausted]
Sonic: I'm not just the fastest thing on Mobius, I'm the tired-est I'm too big to rake.
Sonia: You're so tired, I bet I could beat you to the van.
Sonic: Get serious, sis, and watch me haul some hypersonic haunch!
[He zooms off in a flash.]
Manic: That's our bro. Never too tired to be himself.
Sonia: Let's do it!
[They dash off. The screen circles out and goes black. The credits appear.]
Transcripts

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