The Flames of Disaster (episode)/Transcript

Main page

Gallery

Transcript

<< Previous episode

—

Knuckles The Flames of Disaster (transcript)

—

Next episode >>

This is a transcript of the Knuckles episode, "The Flames of Disaster".

[Scene: Whipple Residence, Wade's room.]

[The episode begins with Wade waking up from his bed, as "Good Morning" by Judy Garland and Mickey Rooney plays on the background. He gets his newspaper thanks to the giant hole in his room.]

Wade: Thanks, Eric.

Eric: [offscreen] Morning, Wade.

Wade: Loving the new wheels, pal.

[Scene change: Whipple Residence, kitchen.]

[Wade walks around the damaged house from yesterday's attack, and goes to the kitchen. He prepares a bowl of cereal, opens the fridge to get milk, with the fridge's door falling to the floor.]

[Scene change: Whipple Residence, outside.]

[Wade walks outside holding a cup of coffee.]

Wade: I think today it's gonna be a beautiful day.

[He looks down and sees his getting trapped and he's dragged out by a mysterious biker, as Knuckles and Wanda walk outside and see Wade being kidnapped.]

Wade: KNUCKLES, HELP ME!!!!

Wanda: [to Knuckles] You gonna rescue him?

Knuckles: No.

Wanda: Yeah, I wouldn't either. [she drinks a bit of her coffee.]

[Cut to Wade being dragged, as the neighbors watch him.]

Wade: DO SOMETHING! MR. JORGENSEN!

[Cut back to Knuckles.]

Knuckles: In order to become a true warrior, he must learn to rescue himself.

[They both see Wade disappear.]

Wade: KNUCKLES!!!

Knuckles: Wade is going to be just fine.

Wade: [offscreen] NO, I'M NOT!

[He drinks coffee from the coffee machine bottle.]

[Scene change: Boise]

[Cut to a panoramic view of the Boise National Forest as Wade screams.]

[Opening credits roll, with Wade playing an accordion.]

[Scene change: Boise National Forest]

[The mysterious and Wade crashes in a sign. The biker gets down this motorcycle and walks towards Wade. Wade gets up to see his kidnaper is... Jack Sinclair.]

Jack: Hello, Wade.

Wade: Jack?

Jack: Are you shocked to see me?

Wade: What?

Jack: You will be.

[Jack fires a pair of tasers, as Wade tries to reach out to hug Jack.]

Jack: Yeah. You feelin' this?

[Cut to black.]

[Scene change: Outside of Boise National Forest]

[Wade wakes up in giant cage, which is tied up to a limo.]

Jack: Ah, that's a good chap. You're through the worst.

Wade: Really? Feels like I'm in the middle of the worst right now. Whatever this is.

Jack: Let me tell you the first rule of bounty hunting: Know your target like he's your former best friend. And in this case... [he informs his app, that he caught Wade] He is. The treasures one finds on Facebook Marketplace^W. The guy I bought it from was a total weirdo, though.

Wade: Jack, please don't do this to me.

Jack: I believe I already have.

Wade: Do you even know why there's a price on my head? Do you even care? When did you become so heartless?

Wade: The second rule of bounty hunting: Never let things get personal.

Wade: You're my best friend! This is very personal!

Jack: You're right, Wade. I should level with you. I'm in dire financial straits. Due to my lawsuit against an unnamed rainforest-themed restaurant franchise, I don't have two pennies to my name.

Wade: I told you, the robotic birds in that restaurant make the same joke no matter who walks in.

Jack: They were PERSONAL ATTACKS!!!

[Crows fly cawing.]

Wade: OKAY! WHATEVER!

Jack: Never mind. Turning you in, equals turning my life around. But if it helps, I'm truly sorry.

Wade: [sarcastically] Yeah, that does actually help. Thank you.

Jack: Terrific.

Wade: Jack, think about it. How did we get...

[Jack pulls a lever and Wade is electrocuted while holding the bars.]

Automatic voice: Do not touch bars.

Jack: Simple. I trapped you, lured you, and cleverly snared you. I was hoping for a little bit more of a fight, to be honest.

Wade: I mean, as friends. How did we get here? First Reno and the Renegades, now this stupid bounty. Did you ever value our friendship at all?

Jack: We had a good run, but you and I are like the frog carrying the scorpion across the river.

Wade: Oh, my God. Not with this story, it goes on forever.

Jack: You allow me to ride on your back, despite knowing I cannot resist my nature to sting you. Even if it means we both drown. Except, I'm also a scorpion who knows how to swim. An exquisite scorpion... with beautiful hair and a way with the ladies. Alright, let's get this show on the road.

Wade: Jack. Jack!

[Wade touches the bars he's electrocuted.]

Automatic voice: Do not touch bars.

Wade: Ouch!

Jack: [chuckles] Woo-hoo!

[Jack enters the limo, with the Bill and Mrs. Barnes looking at him disgusted, while Susie is playing a Nintendo Switch.]

Jack: Sorry about that, gang. One quick drop-off, then it's Reno, baby. Woo!

[He pushes a remote control a karaoke machine is activated and plays "Send Me An Angel" by Real Life.]

Jack: Karaoke time. You ready, Susie's dad, whose name I can't remember?

Bill: For the third time, it's Bill!

Jack: [on mic] I don't care. [singing] Do you believe in Heaven above? Do you believe in love? Take it, Susie's dad.

[Jack throws the microphone to Bill, but the microphone hits the window.]

Bill: You didn't tell you were gonna throw it.

[Scene change: Wade's cage]

Wade: Jack! Jack!

[Wade looks at the cage. He tries to touch the bars with his finger and he gets zapped.]

Automatic voice: Do not touch bars.

Wade: Come on, buddy. If you're waiting for me to be at my all-time lowest... I am there right now, so come and save me. Come get me. [sighs] Whenever you... feel like it... KNUCKLES HELP ME!!!

[Smash cut to black.]

[Scene change: Inside the limo]

[Mrs. Barnes is forced to sing by Jack.]

Mrs. Barnes: [singing] Send me an angel.

Jack: Louder, Susie's mom!

Mrs. Barnes: Okay! Okay! [singing] Send me an angel.

Jack: Kick it!

Mrs. Barnes: [singing] Right now.

[Scene change: Wade's cage]

[Wade's phone rings.]

Wade: Ah, come on. Dude. [he answers it] Jack, if this is a prank call, I am really not in the mood for it right now.

Knuckles: [on phone] Listen to me, Wade. Time is of the essence.

Wade: Knuckles! You have to bust me outta here.

Knuckles: [on phone] You must bust yourself out, Wade. By learning where a warrior's true strength lies.

Wade: Okay, I understand what you're trying to do.

Knuckles: [on phone] You will travel to our ancestral lands, the Great Battleground in the Sky.

Wade: Fine.

Knuckles: [on phone] Now, clear your mind and slip into a deep meditative state.

[Wade closes his eyes and tries to meditate.]

Wade: I think it's working. I'm ascending.

[Scene change: Inside the limo]

Jack: Let's put some wattage in this cottage!

Wade: [on screen] I'm ascending to...

Jack: Electrocute!

[Jack pushes a button on his remote.]

[Scene change: Wade's cage]

[Wade is electrocuted by the cage and falls unconscious. Screen cuts to black.]

Automatic voice: Do not touch bars.

[Scene change: Great Battleground in the Sky]

[Wade wakes up in the Great Battleground in the Sky, which takes the form of Neon Nightz.]

Wade: Where am I?

Pachacamac: I'll tell where you are, Wade.

[Wade screams upon encountering Pachacamac, as he does too.]

Pachacamac: Woah, woah, woah, woah! Calm down!

[Wade stops screaming.]

Pachacamac: Here, let me make you more comfortable.

[Pachacamac transforms into a bowling alley employee.]

Wade: Woah.

Pachacamac: Let's try again. I'll tell you where you are, Wade. The Great Battleground in the Sky!

Wade: The Great Battleground in the Sky is... a bowling alley?

Pachacamac: Well, for you it is. For most people, this place has more of a Florida feel, with all-you-can-eat shrimp. But this... is your battleground.

Wade: Okay. Who are you?

Pachacamac: My name's Pachacamac.

Wade: Wait. Knuckles told me about you. You're the legendary leader of the Echidna tribe.

Pachacamac: In the flesh, baby.

Wade: Well, it's an honor to meet you, Chief, um...

Pachacamac: Pachacamac.

Wade: Yeah. Chief... Pamachacaw.

Pachacamac: Pachacamac.

Wade: Parmesan.

Pachacamac: Pa...

Wade: Peh...

Pachacamac: ...cha...

Wade: ...jor...

Pachacamac: ...ca...

Wade: ...mar...

Pachacamac: ...mac.

Wade: ...za.

Pachacamac: Y'know what? Mac's fine.

Wade: Okay. If that's... easier for you. I certainly have no problem with the correct pronunciation.

Mac: Yeah, right.

Wade: Things are starting to make some obviously clear and logical sense. Knuckles must've sent me here because this is my next lesson. Hold on. Are you gonna teach me something amazing and essential to my real-life predicament?

Mac: I'm not just going to teach it to you, Wade. I'm going to have it sung to you as part of a low-budget rock opera. Now, please open your mouth. [he takes out a wand.]

Wade: Um, I'm not really comfortable with that. [nervous laugh]

Mac: Just do it, man. Rainbow! [his wand shoots an animated rainbow inside Wade's mouth.]

[Scene change: Great Battleground in the Sky]

[Wade wakes up in a Knuckles costume. A banner is unfolded writing "KNUCKLES THE ECHIDNA IN 'THE FLAMES OF DISASTER'" and another one writing "STARRING WADE WHIPPLE AS KNUCKLES".]

Wade: Wait. Wait. I'm not in the show, am I?

MAc: [on PA] Prepare yourself, Wade. Because if you want to learn where Knuckles' true strength lies, you must see this quest... through his eyes. You must become him.

[Two stunt people put him his cowl on.]

Wade: [in Knuckles' voice] This is going to be awesome. Wait. I'm Knuckles? I mean... [makes a pose] I'm Knuckles!

Mac: [on PA] Hey, Wade, don't make this weirder than it already is.

Wade: [normal voice] Got it. Good note.

[ Rock music starts playing. Jack appears dressed up as an Giant Owl.]

Jack: [singing] On a glorious quest! Hello, Wade

Wade: Jack?

Jack: [singing] For glory!

Wade: Uh, what?

Jack: [singing] With his hands of stone. And knees that never buckle. Come and witness the tale of the warrior, Knuckles... Yeah!

[A banner is unfolded writing "CO-STARRING JACK SINCLAIR AS LONGCLAW THE GIANT OWL".]

Wade: Uh, what is Jack Sinclair doing in here?

Mac: [on PA] Clearly, you two have unfinished business.

Wade: Ah, yeah, no, fair point. He does have me locked up in a giant cage right now. Uh, proceed.

Jack: And now we begin our quest.

[Two stunt people put a pacifier on Wade's mouth and hand him a teddy bear.]

Jack: [singing] When our hero was only a lad, he was trained by the greatest, his dad. Had the technique and also the guts. He prepared to kick multiple butts.

["Knuckles" and his "dad" are seen training together.]

Jack: [singing] But the Giant Owls, they did come. They had one mission: to kill everyone. Knuckles and Dad didn't know what to do. Yes, they were doomed. The owls, they clawed and they kicked. They hooted and flew into fits. They set fire to the town and burned it to the ground. I'm so freaking upset, I can't sing about it!

[Many owls arrive and despite "Knuckles"' and his "father's" efforts, the owls "kill" his father.]

"Knuckles": Father you can't leave me!

"Knuckles' father": I won't, son! I never... [he "dies"]

"Knuckles": NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

[Cut to Jack playing a piano in sad tone.]

Jack: [singing] Some things can't be fixed, even with big gloves. Saddest story that you ever heard of.

Wade: Can I go to the bathroom?

Jack: No, we're doing something.

Wade: I really gotta go.

Jack: Tough. [singing] Now Knuckles was sad and alone. Without a father and without a home.

Chorus: [singing] The Giant Owls killed his dad.

Jack: [singing] So, off on his own, he just needed the power!

[Cut to "Knuckles" running through a field, collecting rings.]

"Knuckles": [singing] I will find the Flames of Disaster!

Jack: Michael Bolton, everyone!

[A banner is unfolded writing "ALSO FEATURING THE VOICE OF MICHAEL BOLTON".]

Chorus: [singing] A glorious quest for glory!

"Knuckles": [singing] I need to find the Flames of Disaster!

Chorus: [singing] A glorious quest for glory!

["Knuckles" tries to escape a swarm of "wasps", crawling.]

Jack: [singing] But the power was no simple task. Too many obstacles lay in his path. Stinking to high heaven, needing a bath. That's when he saw the demon made of fire and ash, who said...

[A group of stun people are seen controlling a giant monster puppet, resembling Iblis.]

"Iblis": [singing] I'm gonna burn you alive 'till you're crisp! Then boil your bones and eat you like a fish! [holding a laptop] Then I might hit Facebook Marketplace up! Might be some deals on some freakin' cool stuff!

["Iblis" fires a lava ball on "Knuckles" who destroys it with his fist.]

Jack: [singing] But our hero went back to the start. Saw that the strength was deep inside his... heart!!

Wade: My fists.

[Everyone stops what they're doing.]

Wade: The secret is in my fists. That's right. That makes a lot of sense. Thanks, everybody. Got it.

[The lights turn back on as Wade leaves, before tossing his Knuckles outfit.]

Jack: What? No!

Mac: Wade, wait! That's not the right lesson!

Wade: I got it from here. I know exactly what to do.

[Wade leaves the Battleground via a door.]

[Scene change: Wade's cage]

[Wade awakens in the cage.]

Wade: Of course. Time to unleash the source of my true power. My fists.

[Wade punches the cage, only be electrocuted once more, screaming in pain.]

Wade: WHY DID I THINK THAT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA?!

[Wade falls unconscious once again.]

Automatic voice: Seriously. Do not touch bars.

[Cut to black.]

Wade: Oh, I should have listened to the rest of the story. Take me back, Chief Macamacachalkadoo.

[Scene change: Great Battleground in the Sky]

[Wade wakes up in his Knuckles costume. Jack is waiting him mad about earlier.]

Jack: Well, well, well, look who's back. You gonna let us finish now?

Wade: Yes, sir. I apologize.

Jack: Great. [he begins playing his keytar; singing] Yahooooooo. Yow! Are you ready? Let's go.

["Iblis" roars as "Knuckles" is finally ready to face the demon. Two stunt performers spray Wade with a two fire extinguishers.]

Wade: Okay! Okay! Thank you!

Jack: [singing] But the demon was not impressed by the puny red guy before him. He looked down and rolled his eyes and then, without any warning... Oh my God!

[Cut to "Knuckles" dodging his lava balls, until "Iblis" unleashes a bigger that takes down "Knuckles".]

Jack: [singing] He used magic and lava and before you even knew it, Knuckles was defeated, his mission uncompleted. He totally freaking blew it! Oh my God! Broken and vanquished, our hero layed on the ground, as the demon screamed out...

"Iblis": [singing] You're going down! Unskilled, untrained, so unworthy! Unskilled, untrained, so unworthy! Unskilled, untrained, so unworthy! You suuuuuuuck! You freaking suck! And now I'm afraid, this is the end of your story.

["Iblis" strikes "Knuckles" with a "lightning bolt".]

"Knuckles": [singing] Is it too late to find out where my strength lies? I didn't feel it in my bones when I flew high. It wasn't in the lightning coursing off of my skin Could a warrior's true strength come from within...?

[A stun man places a heart on "Knuckles'" chest, and "Knuckles" rises.]

Jack: [singing] Just when everyone counted him out, Knuckles rose up with a furious shout.

"Knuckles": [singing] Take heed, demon! We've entered our final fight! Now prepare for my glorious might!

"Iblis": [singing] You fool, only I can be the power's master.

"Knuckles": [singing] No! You're wrong! 'Cause now I wield... The Flames of Disaster!

["Knuckles" summons the Flames of Disaster and begins "beating up" the demon.]

Jack: [singing] It wasn't even close when our boy got going. A royal beatdown, with flame fists a-glowing.

"Knuckles": [singing] I've had this power right from the start. But now, I know that true strength lies in a warrior's heart!

["Knuckles" jumps in the air, performing a Drill Attack to "defeat" the demon.]

[Scene change: Wade's cage]

[Wade jumps out from the cage, destroying the roof. This action shakes the limo. Wade lands on the road as a group of bikers watch him surprised by that action.]

Wade: Ow!

[The limo stops.]

Wade: Oh, my back, too.

[Jack and the Barnes get out from the limo.]

Jack: How the devil did you get out?! I should have reinforced the cage!

Wade: With my true strength.

[The bikers look at him in disbelief.]

Wade: Nothing? [to Jack] Jack Sinclair, I challenge you to a duel. For my freedom, my honor... and that sweet leather jacket!

Jack: Finally, the day gets interesting. A duel it is.

[Jack climbs to the limo, where his motorcycle is stored.]

Wade: Spry.

[He and takes out two katanas, stored in his motorcycle and spins them.]

Jack: These blades were forged by Hattori Hanzō^W himself. The sharpest, strongest blades on Earth.

Wade: Great.

[Jack throws on his swords to Wade, which lands right next to him.]

Wade: [as he picks it up] Oh, boy.

[Jack rides his motorcycle and drives a few meters away.]

Jack: Kufafanua wakati!

[He then spins and prepares himself for the duel.]

Jack: I suggest you find a ride.

Wade: What?

Jack: [from afar] I said "I suggest you find a ride"!

Wade: Still didn't hear it.

Jack: [from afar] What?

Wade: What?

Jack: [from afar] I can't hear you.

Wade: I'm sorry, I'm not hearing you all that well.

Jack: [from afar] I can hear part of it, but not all of it.

Wade: WHAT?!

Jack: [from afar] You need a vehicle, in order to fight me!

Wade: Oh, okay! Got it!

[Wade goes to the biker group.]

Wade: Hey. How you guys doing? That is one cool bike. Caught my eye. You think I could borrow it for a few seconds?

Kid: Sure. No problem.

Wade: Thanks.

Kid: For 10 G's!

[Wade gives some money to he kid.]

Wade: Look, here's four bucks. I'm a deputy lieutenant sheriff. I would never do this ordinarily, but I am commandeering this vehicle.

[Wade takes the kid's bike.]

Kid: Hey!

[Wade rides the bike ready for his duel. Jack braids his hair into a ponytail and takes out his other sword.]

Wade: [to himself] Alright, Wade. You can do this. Just trust your true inner strength.

Kid: You're gonna die, idiot!

Wade: That's not cool! You don't know!

[A mailman takes out a flare gun, and fires it in the air, meaning they can begin their duel. Once it strikes in the air, the two warriors begin.]

Jack: Woo-hoo!

[Wade and Jack ride their vehicles, with Wade struggling to ride the bike. They both prepare their blades.]

Jack: AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

Wade: YYYYYYAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

Jack: WOOOOOOOOOHAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

[They both yell in slow motion. Seeing Wade aiming for his head, Jack ducks and Wade cuts off his ponytail, causing him loose grip and fall to the ground. As he gets up, Jack realizes his hair was cut.]

Wade: [holding his ponytail] Looking for this?

Jack: My locks. My beautiful locks! What have you done to me?

Wade: You're lucky I didn't do a whole lot more. [he turns to the Barnes family] Hey, Mr. and Mrs. Barnes. You know, I'm sorry things got a little bit outta control back there.

Mrs. Barnes: Finish him, Wade!

[Susie gives him a thumbs up.]

Wade: With pleasure.

[Wade approaches a defeated Jack, who is now scared of him.]

Wade: I'm gonna need that jacket.

[Jack takes off his jacket and throws it over to Wade.]

Wade: And the vest.

Jack: It... it's my favorite leather-jerkin.

Wade: A leather-what? I don't... Just give it to me.

[Jack takes off his vest too and throws it over to Wade.]

Wade: And... the shirt.

Jack: No. No!

Wade: It's happening.

Jack: Please. Please!

Wade: Sorry.

Jack: We were friends. We were best friends.

Wade: Former... best friends.

[Jack takes off his shirt embarrassed.]

Jack: [to everyone] Don't look at me. Don't look at me!

[Mrs. Barnes covers Susie's eyes.]

Jack: Do you know the third rarely referenced rule of bounty hunting? When faced with a worthy opponent... YOU RUN THE HELL AWAY!!!!

[Jack gets up quickly runs away from everyone.]

Jack: [crying] DON'T LOOK AT ME!!!! DON'T LOOK AT ME!!!!

Wade: I DID IT!

[Everyone cheers for Wade.]

[Scene change: Wade's neighborhood]

[The neighbors see someone approaching.]

[Scene change: Whipple Residence, kitchen.]

[It's Wade riding Jack's motorcycle and wearing his hat and jacket.]

Wanda: Is that?

Wendy: It can't be.

Knuckles: It is.

[Wade parks in front of his family and Knuckles.]

Wade: Mother. Sister.

Wendy: Wade... get off the grass.

Wade: Yup. Sorry. Hehe.

Knuckles: He's ready.

[Cut to black.]

[Scene change: Road, sunset.]

[Knuckles, now wearing Jack's hat, rides Jack's motorcycle with Wade sitting on the back, with Wendy and Wanda accompanying them on their car. The camera zooms on Wade's back to reveal he changed the team's name, from Renegades to "The Warriors", as they all head to Reno for the Tournament of Champions.]

Transcripts

---

V·T·E · Category