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Teasing Time (transcript)
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This is the transcript of the Sonic X episode, "Teasing Time".

[Scene: The Blue Typhoon - Bridge]

[Cheese is asleep on Sonic's lap.]
Sonic: Hey, Tails. Why don't you try steerin' the ship on a different course now?
Tails: I guess I can. But where exactly do you want me to go, Sonic?
Sonic: Wherever. It doesn't matter. It's just we've been going in this direction since the Metarex began chasing us twelve hours ago, and I've been wondering why they haven't fired a shot at us.
Cosmo: Are you suggesting that the Metarex tricked us into going this way?
Tails: Is it a trap, Sonic?
Sonic: Why don't we find out?
Tails: [Determined] OK! And while we're at it, we can test out how accurate their tracking sensors are. Let's push our speed to the max! Chris, increase auxiliary engines to maximum power!
Chris: Roger. Increasing power now.
Tails: Turn to Mark 3.1!
Amy: Are you sure this is a good idea? They're turning too!
Chris: It's a laser blast. The Metarex are firing at us.
Cream: All shields up!

[Scene Change: Space]

[An energy beam strikes the Typhoon, but its shields prevent any damage.]

[Scene: The Blue Typhoon - Bridge]

Knuckles: Guess they don't want us going this way.
Tails: Change course to Mark 0.8! Maintain speed!
[The Typhoon turns ten degrees to the left.]
Amy: But there are three ships approaching at Mark 370, and they're coming at us full speed!
[Three small round Metarex spaceships approach the Typhoon.]
Tails: Quick! Target those ships now!
Chris: You got it!
[He types on his keypad.]
Tails: Amy! Load six missiles and prepare to fire on my command!

[Scene Change: Space]

Chris: [Voice-over] Target set.
Amy: [Voice-over] Missiles are loaded.
Tails: [Voice-over] Fire!
[Several missiles are launched, destroying all three ships in the distance.]
Chris: [Voice-over] All three ships have been destroyed! Five more are on the way.
Tails: [Voice-over] Return to original coordinates!
Chris: [Voice-over] Roger.
Tails: [Voice-over] Now it's their move!

[Scene: The Blue Typhoon - Bridge]

Tails: Cream! Keep all the shields up!
Cream: Roger!
Tails: [To himself] If the Metarex back off now, it's because they want us to head this way.

[Scene Change: Space]

[The five Metarex Fighters fly away from the Typhoon.]
Chris: [Voice-over] The Metarex ships turned around. They aren't chasing us anymore.

[Scene: The Blue Typhoon - Bridge]

Tails: The Metarex are up to something.
Sonic: [Nods] Looks that way.
Knuckles: Chris, are there any Metarex ahead of us?
Chris: [While typing] I've been trying to search the area with our scanners, but so far I haven't detected anything at all. It's possible that somebody's jamming our scanners.
[An image of the space in front of them is projected.]
Knuckles: Then it is a trap. We should turn around.
Sonic: No way. I'm really curious to know what the Metarex are scheming.
Knuckles: You want us to stay on course? That doesn't make any sense, Sonic! We're bound to get attacked!
Sonic: [Smirks] That's what I'm hoping for.

[The opening theme plays]

[Scene Change]

[Black Narcissus is sitting in his command chair, speaking to Dark Oak via radio.]
Dark Oak: [Over radio] Send a fleet of battleships to destroy Sonic now!
Black Narcissus: No, I want to confront him face-to-face! It's much more challenging, and amusing!
Dark Oak: [Over radio] Do not underestimate that hedgehog and his friends. Remember what happened to your fellow commander Red Pine.
Black Narcissus: [Laughs] Red Pine was a weak fool. He did not have the right skills to defeat Sonic. But I do. It's all a matter of brainpower. You see, it's impossible to vanquish a powerful opponent, unless you understand him. [Stands up] I have built two prototype robots to test the hedgehog's abilities. Perhaps they can defeat Sonic. If not, I'll use the data from their attack to construct another robot that will destroy him. [Laughs]
[Black Narcissus leaves as the lights die down.]

[Scene: The Blue Typhoon - Bridge]

[Up ahead is a crater-filled planet.]
Chris: The scanners picked up a planet dead ahead.
Amy: But I thought the Metarex were jamming our sensors.
Tails: Well, I guess they changed their mind and decided to stop jamming them for some reason, Amy.
[Chris is typing.]
Knuckles: Thanks for straightening that out for us.
Chris: I'll bring a magnified view up on the main screen.
[The results appear on the screen.]
Knuckles: That's magnified?
Amy: We can hardly see anything!
Chris: I can make the image bigger. I'll just have to zoom in digitally.
[He greatly zooms in on the planet, and he can see that it is pockmarked with craters everywhere.]
Knuckles: Not exactly a prime peace of real estate, is it?
Tails: Huh? Hold on! Look at those readings! Computer analysis shows that all those craters were made recently!
[A shot of various glows destroying the planet is shown.]
Tails: The Metarex probably kept attacking this planet until it was totally lifeless.
[Even Sonic is speechless.]
Cosmo: Tails is right...
Knuckles: I thought it was a bad idea to come here, but I've changed my mind. If these Metarex wanna challenge us, then I say bring 'em on! The scanners have located their base. Let's go there and make 'em pay for what they did to this planet!
[A certain area is highlighted on the planet. It appears to be a Metarex base.]
Amy: They think they've fooled us, which'll make it even sweeter when we beat those Metarex!
Tails: OK! Let's go for it!
Cream: Turning off all shields to increase power! Now we're ready to go!
[The Typhoon travels at full speed towards the Metarex outpost. Just then, Chris' scanner detects something.]
Chris: This can't be right... The ship's sensors have detected a bunch of Chaos Emeralds.
Cosmo: What's going on?
Cream: Didn't you adjust the sensors so you wouldn't pick up any more fake Emeralds?
Sonic: What makes you think these Emeralds might be fake? They could be real.
Cream: There is no way this many Chaos Emeralds exist!
Sonic: How many of 'em are out there?
Tails: About 500!
[Sonic covers his stomach.]
Sonic: Whoa, that's a big rock collection.
Chris: It looks like these fake Chaos Emeralds are a lot more advanced than the others we've seen.
Knuckles: Those Metarex are definitely clever.
Cosmo: But they're also devious and dangerous.
Amy: Speaking of the Metarex, you guys...
[A message is being typed out on the holo-screen.]
Amy: [cont.] ...it looks like they're sending us a message.
Knuckles: This is the first time they've ever sent us a text message.
Tails: I'll turn on the translator.
Cosmo: You don't have to bother; I can read it. [Reading] "Greetings, space voyagers. It was I who sent the Metarex to attack your ship and chase you down. You were being tested, and you have passed with honor. I admire your great courage, and I invite you to visit my base. I am Black Narcissus, a commander of the Metarex."
Knuckles: So he's inviting us to his base? Let's send him an RSVP on a missile!
Amy: If we do go to that base, you should stay on the ship. You're much too hot-headed for this mission.
Knuckles: What?! I am not a hothead!
Amy: [Deadpan] Oh, yeah?
Chris: [Laughs] She got ya.
Cosmo: There's more.
Chris: Uh... really? What else does it say, Cosmo?
Cosmo: I'm all mixed up! I meant to say there isn't anything more to the message!
Chris: Huh?
Sonic: Okay! Let's go and say hello!
Tails: I doubt the Metarex will invite us back after we wreck the place.
[The crew laugh. Cosmo abruptly leaves the room. Chris takes note of this. With a sad expression, Cosmo descends the elevator and enters the hangar. She turns the ignition of Amy's spaceship and opens the hatch. She climbs inside and buckles the seat belt before closing her eyes in depression.]
Cosmo: [To herself] I hope they'll forgive me for deceiving them...

[Scene Change: The Metarex base]

[Several giant missiles are launched from the Metarex base.]

[Scene Change: The Blue Typhoon - Bridge]

[Warning sirens go off.]
Tails: The Metarex just fired missiles at us!
Amy: That isn't a very warm welcome!
Cheese: Chao chao chao!
Cream: Sending more power to the front shields!
[Amy runs back to her seat.]
Knuckles: These Metarex are playing games with us! I knew they were sneaky, but this is a new low!
Sonic: Cosmo?
[Missiles fly towards the Typhoon.]
Cream: They're coming in fast!
Knuckles: There's too many of them to shoot down!
Amy: Hey Sonic!
[She studies the make-up of the missiles.]
Amy: According to the sensors, those missiles are packed with potassium nitrate and aluminum! That's weird.
Sonic: I don't get it.
Tails: Well, those chemicals are used in fireworks.
[The missiles burst around them, bathing them in an intensely bright light.]
Knuckles: I had a feeling this trip was gonna blow up in our faces!

[Scene Change: Space]

[Cosmo flies Amy's spaceship toward the Metarex base. A hatch opens, a Cosmo passes through it. Now under the planet's surface, she lands her craft and climbs out.]
Black Narcissus: [Off-screen] You may proceed through the tunnel. I am waiting for you.
[She enters another, much larger, room.]
Black Narcissus: [Off-screen] So you came alone. You are braver than I thought. I rather suspected that you would lose your nerve.
Cosmo: Where are you? Is there some reason why you're hiding from me?
Black Narcissus: [Off-screen] Calm yourself. You have nothing to fear... so far.
[Black Narcissus' chair rises out of the floor in the center of the room.]
Black Narcissus: [Laughs] Welcome to my base!
Cosmo: You promised to tell me everything. I want to know the truth about my ancestors and the Metarex. You tell me now, or I'm leaving!
Black Narcissus: Foolish girl. You aren't going anywhere. You're incredibly naive. Don't you realize you've been tricked?
[Cosmo realizes her mistake.]
Black Narcissus: The only reason I brought you here was to make you my prisoner.
Cosmo: Prisoner?

[Scene Change: The Blue Typhoon - Bridge]

[Tails translates the rest of Black Narcissus' message.]
Tails: "Answers I have about your clan that you seek... To my base you will come in five minutes when I launch the missiles at your ship."
Amy: That message doesn't make any sense. Are you sure the translator is working?
Tails: I think so.
Cream: Cosmo is the only one who understands the Metarex's writing. Has Sonic figured out where she went?
Tails: Not yet, but I'm sure he'll find her soon and send her to the bridge.
Sonic: [Over radio] I wouldn't count on that if I were you.

[Scene Change: The Blue Typhoon - Hangar]

Sonic: Amy's ship is missing.

[Scene Change: The Blue Typhoon - Bridge]

Tails: Huh? [While typing] How could she leave the Blue Typhoon without the sensors spotting her?

[Scene Change: The Blue Typhoon - Hangar]

[Sonic removes a chip from the sensor.]
Sonic: She must have had help... from a hacker.
Tails: [Over radio] But the only one who could hack into the system other than me is Chris!
Sonic: He's gone too.
[The Typhoon heads towards the planet.]

[Scene Change: The Metarex base]

[Chris is standing next to Cosmo, having removed his helmet.]
Chris: Listen to me. There must be a way to work this out peacefully. Can we just try--
Black Narcissus: [Interrupting] Silence! I have no intention of negotiating with you. You were not invited here. Return to your ship at once, or you will be destroyed.
[Cosmo looks at Chris]
Cosmo: I'm sorry I got you involved in this mess, Chris.
Chris: Forget it, OK? It's not like you forced me to come along. I wanted to help you. I don't understand exactly why you wanted to come here, but I'm sure you had a good reason.
Cosmo: [Upset] I did! Please understand! I had to come! I had to! Really!
Chris: [Laughs] I'm sorry to laugh, Cosmo.
[He bends down to her level.]
Chris: It's just that you remind me of myself when I was younger.
Cosmo: When you were younger?
Chris: Well, when we make it back to the Blue Typhoon, I'll try to explain. [Stands up] Let's get going.
[They begin to leave, but Black Narcissus' voice stops them.]
Black Narcissus: Hold it. Your friend Cosmo stays here.
Chris: Sorry... but I don't think so!
[He throws a flash bomb in front of Black Narcissus and grabs Cosmo's arm.]
Chris: Come on, Cosmo!
[Black Narcissus reacts too late.]
Black Narcissus: This is the most dismal escape attempt that I've ever seen. I'll give them a head start to try and add some excitement.
[Chris and Cosmo run towards Amy's spaceship, but the hangar door closes right in front of them.]
Chris: Don't worry; I've got everything under control.
[He fishes out a device and presses a button. A laser fires out of the spaceship and destroys the door. Chris protects Cosmo from the blast and puts his helmet on.]
Chris: Now let's go!
[In one deft move, Black Narcissus slashes Chris' stomach, causing his helmet to crack. He falls to the ground unconscious.]
Cosmo: Chris! Are you all right?!
Black Narcissus: Your friend is not hurt... for now. I must say, I'm rather pleased he tried to flee. It's been too long since I've felt the thrill of taking down a foe with my own hands. I must try it more often.

[Scene Change: Space]

[The Blue Typhoon aims the Sonic Driver at the Metarex base. Sonic stands ready.]
Tails: [Over intercom] Okay, this is it. Target coordinates for base are set. Prepare to load the Sonic Power Cannon!
Amy: [Over intercom] I hope Sonic brings Chris and Cosmo back here safely, so I can pound some sense into 'em!
Cream: [Over intercom] I can't believe Chris was so reckless. Who does he think he is?! Knuckles?

[Scene Change: The Blue Typhoon - Engine room]

Knuckles: Cut the chatter and let's get on with the attack!
Amy: [Over radio] Take it easy! We're ready!
Knuckles: Then let's go! Tails, let's fire up the cannon to full power!

[Scene Change: The Blue Typhoon - Bridge]

Tails: Yeah. If we can get Sonic in there fast, we may catch Black Narcissus by surprise.

[Scene Change: Space]

[Sonic leaps around a bit before landing on the spin platform.]
Tails: All set, Sonic?
Sonic: Sure am! That Metarex won't know what hit 'im!

[Scene Change: The Blue Typhoon - Engine room]

Knuckles: Okay! Then I'll get the cannon ready to fire!

[Scene Change: The Blue Typhoon - Bridge]

Tails: Increase the power level to maximum energy now!

[Scene Change: Space]

Tails: Sonic, prepare for launch!
[He starts spinning.]
Tails: I'm locking on target!

[Scene Change: The Blue Typhoon - Bridge]

Tails: Get ready... We're blasting you at that base full speed!

[Scene Change: Space]

Tails: Sonic Power Cannon, fire!
[The Cannon fires Sonic at the Metarex base.]

[Scene Change: The Metarex Base]

[Sonic crashes through the base, crashing through floor after floor, until he lands in a room full of Chaos Emeralds. When the smoke clears, he looks around.]
Sonic: The scanner was right.
[He sees all of the fake Chaos Emeralds.]
Sonic: There are a lot of fake Emeralds here. [Chokes] Suddenly I don't feel so great.
Black Narcissus: [Off-screen] Sonic the Hedgehog, how kind of you to drop in
[Sonic looks up to see no-one.]
Black Narcissus: [Off-screen] I've been looking forward to meeting you. Won't you join me in my command center?
[Sonic leaps up through the floor and sees Black Narcissus seated in his throne.]
Black Narcissus: You're not at all what I expected. I didn't think you'd be so scrawny. It's hard to believe that you're a great fighter.
Sonic: [Smugly] Well, maybe later I can prove to you how tough I am. But right now, I wanna see my friends. No, are you gonna show me where they are?
Black Narcissus: Of course I will. Your friends have not been harmed. In fact, the only reason I took them prisoner was to lure you here. You see, I've heard so many stories about your powers that I decided to bring you here for an experiment.
Sonic: Sorry, pal, but I'm a hedgehog, not a guinea pig. Now where are my friends?
Black Narcissus: You will cooperate with my experiment. We will start by collecting data on your strength and speed.
Sonic: I already told you there's no way I'm gonna help ya. Now show me where my friends are!
[Black Narcissus presses a button, and a glass bubble containing Cosmo and Chris rises out of the floor.]
Black Narcissus: Since you refuse, then I will have to experiment on your friends.
Cosmo: This is a trap, Sonic!
[Sonic is shocked.]
Black Narcissus: [Laughs] Your friends certainly make a pathetic pair.
Cosmo: [Teary] Sonic! Save yourself!
[Sonic rushes over.]
Sonic: Chris! Cosmo!
[The prisoners sink back into the ground.]
Black Narcissus: The fate of your friends rests entirely in your hands. If you choose to oppose me, then I assure you they will pay a painful price.
[Sonic feels his anger rising.]
Black Narcissus: It should be quite entertaining! [Laughs] Well, Sonic? What is your decision? Are you ready to proceed with the experiment?
Sonic: I've never seen Cosmo look so scared...
Black Narcissus: She should be.
[Sonic's fur darkens in his intense anger, and a black aura surrounds him. He is now Dark Sonic.]
Dark Sonic: Chris... was passed out... What did you do to him?
Black Narcissus: He attempted to escape, and was taught a painful lesson.
[Two Metarex enter the room. Their names are Gold and Silver.]
Black Narcissus: It is time for the experiment. These two Metarex were designed by me especially for this occasion. Gold will test your strength, and Silver your speed. I've based my Metarex designs on data that was collected during previous battles against you. I'm eager to see if they're powerful enough to defeat you.
[Dark Sonic stares at Black Narcissus, with a malicious grin on his face. He chuckles darkly.]
Dark Sonic: Alright then... Let's test 'em out!
[He immediately destroys Silver, and several hits finish off Gold. In the smoke, we can see that Sonic's fur is completely black, and his eyes are a solid white. This is Dark Sonic in his full form.]
Dark Sonic: Looks like you'll have to go back to the drawing board!
Dr. Eggman: Settle down, Sonic!
[Dark Sonic turns to see, who else but, Dr. Eggman standing there.]
Dr. Eggman: I don't think I've ever seen you this worked up before.
[Decoe and Bocoe are with him as usual.]
Decoe: You are not the only one having a bad day, you know.
Bocoe: Our trip was a real space odyssey.
[The Crimson Egg is revealed to have crashed into the base.]
Dr. Eggman: We had some mechanical difficulties. For some reason, the Egg Drive got scrambled up.
[Sonic has an almost evil look to him as his dark form wears off.]
Dr. Eggman: Space travel is tricky. I've warped past so many planets I'm starting to see stars. Listen, Sonic. I'm really disappointed in you. From now on, be careful not to let your temper get out of control, or once of these days, you'll find that you're always angry, just like another hedgehog we know. You should get out of here. And don't worry about your crew-mates; Shadow already rescued them.
[Sonic looks over to see Cosmo and the still-unconscious Chris in Amy's spaceship. Shadow is standing nearby.]
Shadow: The kid will be alright. I hope you learned your lesson. Next time I may not be around to save you.
[Shadow turns to leave, but Rouge shows up. She screw kicks the machine powering the fake Chaos Emeralds, destroying it.]
Decoe: Rouge wretched the machine that makes the fake Chaos Emeralds!
Bocoe: She seemed to get a real kick out of it.
[Rouge flies back into the room and spits on the ground.]
Rouge: [To Black Narcissus; angrily] That felt great. If there's one thing I hate, it's imitation jewelry. You Metarex have bad taste. From now on, stick to genuine gems.
[She leaves]
Dr. Eggman: [Nervously] You did a great job, Rouge.
Decoe and Bocoe: [Bow] That was awesome! [Wave]
Rouge: [Off-screen] Yes, I know. They don't call me a knockout for nothing.
Dr. Eggman: [To Black Narcissus] I don't like the way you attacked Chris and Cosmo. It's one thing to take them prisoner and threaten them, but when you actually hurt somebody, that's going too far.
Decoe: You said it, Doctor!
Bocoe: Even we have some principles.
Dr. Eggman: And I also don't like you making counterfeit Chaos Emeralds.
Bocoe: Yeah, that's phony-baloney.
Dr. Eggman: And another thing...
[Black Narcissus leans forward in his seat.]
Black Narcissus: Silence!
[Decoe and Bocoe take on the Metarex general.]
Bokkun: [Off-screen] Back off, buster!
Black Narcissus: What the--
[Bokkun also flies in. He kicks Black Narcissus back into his seat.]
Bokkun: Are you ready for round two?
Dr. Eggman: [Laughs] My robots are tougher that they look. They could beat a whole army of Metarex with their bare hands.
[Black Narcissus sparks from the damage he has received.]
Black Narcissus: Why did you interfere, Eggman?
Dr. Eggman: Because I want to sent you and your Meta-pals a warning.
Black Narcissus: What warning? Are you teaming up with Sonic and his friends against us?
Dr. Eggman: [Laughs] Well now, that all depends... on whether you want me to be your most dangerous foe or most valuable friend. It's clear that your battle against Sonic has just begun.

[Scene Change: The Blue Typhoon]

[After a time skip, the Typhoon flies onwards.]
Dr. Eggman: [As Narrator] Black Narcissus, you'd better tell your fellow commanders not to underestimate me again.
[On board, the group celebrate the return of Chris and Cosmo.]
Dr. Eggman: [As Narrator] Today I came to that hedgehog's defense, but that doesn't mean we're on the same side.
[Sonic stands outside the Typhoon with a concerned look on his face.]
Dr. Eggman: [As Narrator] I could still be persuaded to join your team... for the right price!
[He Laughs. The episode ends and the credits roll.]
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