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How to Catch a Hedgehog (transcript)
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This is the transcript of the Sonic X episode, "How to Catch a Hedgehog".

[Scene: A ranch]

[Sonic is defending Amy from Dr. Eggman and his robot, E-88 Lightning Bird. Lightning Bird thunders towards Sonic and Amy, then flashes a blinding light at them.]
Amy: Soniiic!
[As soon as Sonic is able to see again, he sees that Amy has been captured by Lightning Bird which is flying back to Eggman.]
Sonic: Bring her back!
[Eggman laughs.]
Dr. Eggman: If you want her, come save her!
[Even though Amy is caught in Lightning Bird's beak, she still tries to attack it with her hammer. However, this act causes her dress to rip slightly. She cries out.]
Amy: Heeeeelp! Hey, that's a brand new dress, buddy!
Sonic: Amy, you just hang on tight!
[Eggman and Lightning Bird fly away.]

[The opening theme plays]

[As the villains disappear with Amy, the X-Tornado arrives.]
Tails: Sonic, here comes the ring!
Sonic: Okay!
[The X-Tornado fires a Power Ring to Sonic, who catches it.]
Sonic: Got it!
[Using the power of the ring, Sonic leaps up and smashes Lightning Bird with a headbutt, causing him to drop Amy. Unknown to him, a tiny chip falls out of Lightning Bird and lands in his ear. Sonic reaches the same altitude as Eggman. He kicks the Eggmobile away, then dives after the falling Amy. Amy screams as she falls, then stops screaming as Sonic catches her.]
Sonic: Don't worry, Amy, I gotcha.
[Amy smiles and blushes.]
Amy: You're my hero!
[They land in a haystack. Soon they are relaxing on top of the haystack together.]
Amy: Isn't this just beautiful? I wish we could just stay here for days and listen to the wind. Wouldn't that be... romantic?
[She looks over at Sonic, who is digging in his ear.]
Amy: Have you been listening?
Sonic: Say what?
[He gently hits the other side of his head, but that causes the chip to fall in deeper.]
Amy: Ohhh, you men!
[She shuns him.]
Sonic: Uh... [Shrugs] What's wrong?

[Scene Change: Thorndyke Mansion - Driveway.]

[Mister Tanaka is cleaning the car, and Sonic is on the roof of the garage, still digging in his ear. Amy is shoting at him from the ground.]
Amy: You're impossible! You never hear a thing I say!
[Chris and Tails approach.]
Chris: Hey, Amy. What's all the shouting about?
Amy: Your friend Sonic's acting weirder than ever!
Tails: What do you mean, "he's acting weird"?
Amy: He's off in his own little world!
Chris: That's not weird, Amy. That's Sonic.
Amy: He's worse then ever! He hasn't listened to a single word I said all day!
Chris: Well, maybe he's got something on his mind.
Amy: I should've known you wouldn't understand!
[Tanaka presses a button, which inadvertently triggers something in the chip. An LED light begins flashing on it. Sonic lets out a shriek, then leaps off the roof and runs away.]
Chris: He does seem stressed.
Amy: He thinks he's stressed?! Try being me!
Chris: That'd be horrible.
Amy: [Annoyed] What did you say?!
Chris: [Hesitates and talks to Tails] The only way to find out what is really going on with Sonic is to follow him in the X-Tornado.
[Tails nods in agreement.]

[Scene Change: Station Square]

[Sonic is running on the road and avoiding the traffic.]
Sonic: I don't get it! I can't stop my feet!
[A car begins to skid.]
Sonic: Heheh, sorry!
[Further down the road, Sam Speed is speaking to a criminal with a mohawk.]
Sam: Listen, punk, your car may be cool, but if you don't wear seat belts, you're a fool.
[Sonic races by.]
Sam: Huh? That was Sonic! [To the criminal] Thanks to him, you're not gettin' a ticket today! Now go get a haircut!
[He pushes the criminal aside, runs to his car, and hops in.]
Sam: I gotcha now, Sonic!
[He revs the motor and speeds off after Sonic, weaving through traffic as he does so.]
Sam: [On Radio] This is S-Team leader to base. In hot pursuit of high-speed hedgehog going south on Broad Street. Over.
Sonic: I can't stop!

[Scene Change: X-Tornado]

[Tails, Amy, and Chris are in hot pursuit of Sonic.]
Chris: There's Uncle Sam.
Tails: Looks like he's trying to catch up with Sonic.
Chris: I'm gonna radio him. [On radio] Hey Uncle Sam, this is Chris.
Sam: [Over radio] When you're on this frequency, it's S-Team Leader, got it? Besides, I can't chit-chat right now; I'm on a mission.
Chris: [On radio] Sorry, but I need to talk to you about Sonic.
Sam: [Over radio] If you're calling to ask me to take it easy on him, forget it!
Chris: [On radio] But he's acting really strange today. We're worried that there might be something really wrong with him.
Sam: [Over radio] There must be if he thinks he can beat me. Hahahahaha!
[He increases his speed.]
Chris: He acts weirder than Sonic.

[Scene Change: Station Square]

[Sam catches up to Sonic.]
Sam: I got him now.
[Sonic involuntarily increases his speed.]
Sonic: What's going on?!
Sam: All right...
[He guns the motor, but slows down instead.]
Sam: Huh? Out of gas!
[His car slows to a stop in the middle of the road.]
Sam: That little hedgehog may have outrun me this time, but there's always next time. I'll get him.
[Sonic shrugs. He runs past a newspaper stand, blowing over most of the papers. He then dodges an incoming bus.]
Sonic: Oops!
[He enters the subway runs down and escalator and onto the tracks. He narrowly avoids two trains. He runs along the top of the second train, then leaps off of it once he reaches the other side.]
Sonic: I hope there's a light at the end of this thing!
[Above ground, the X-Tornado circles once as Sonic leaves the subway.]
Chris: There he is.
Tails: He's heading for the desert.
Amy: I wonder why he's going there.
[The sun sets as the X-Tornado is pursuing Sonic through the desert.]
Amy: He's still running.
[Sonic increases his speed again.]
Amy: Now he's speeding up again. But why?
[Sonic begins digging in his ear again. There is a flashback of the chip falling into Sonic's ear.]
Amy: Maybe something happened to Sonic while he was battling that robot. That could be why he's acting this way.
Chris: What could it be?
Amy: I don't know.
Chris: Let's go talk with my grandpa. He might be able to figure out what's wrong.
Amy: I hope so. Because if something's wrong with Sonic, it's becasue he saved me.
[Sonic is still digging in his ear.]
Amy: Please be okay, Sonic.

[Scene Change: The Egg Fort II]

Decoe: Doctor, here is something I think you will enjoy.
[A screen activates, showing Sonic running across the desert.]
Dr. Eggman: Hehehe... Well, well... Looks like Sonic is working up quite a sweat!
Bocoe: Perhaps you might want to do the same, Doctor. You have been getting a bit round around the waist lately.
Dr. Eggman: What?! Cut the wisecracks or I'll "waste" you, you imputent trash can!
[He turns back to the screen.]
Dr. Eggman: Sonic must be up to something, but what could it be?

[Scene Change: Chuck's underground lab.]

[The Thorndykes and Sonic's friends are gathered in the lab.]
Chris: He doesn't stop, Grandpa. He just keeps on running.
Amy: We just have to figure out what's wrong with him.
Chuck: The only way to do that is to examine him. But first we have to catch him, and that's not going to be easy.
[Cream and Cheese watch him think. At last Chuck pounds his fist into his palm.]
Chuck: I think I may know a way.

[Scene Change: Thorndyke Mansion]

[Amy is standing out on the balcony, watching Tails and Chuck hard at work in the lab. Chuck yawns. Amy looks at the moon.]
Amy: What's wrong, Sonic? Where are you?

[Scene Change: The desert]

[Sonic is wide awake and still running.]
Sonic: Almost there! Almost there! Where am I going anyway?!

[Scene Change: The Egg Fort II]

[Eggman, Bocoe, and Decoe are asleep.]

[Scene Change: The mission room]

[Chuck has set up a mission room in the desert. The Thorndykes and Sonic's friends are gathered there.]
Chuck: With the help of Tails, I have devised a plan that I believe will work. It's actually quite simple. Step one: we locate Sonic from the X-Tornado. Step two: we launch a specially-designed bubble bomb which will hold him securely and lift him off the ground.
[A diagram shows the X-Tornado firing a balloon bomb at Sonic that, upon impact, forms a balloon that carries Sonic into the air.]
Chuck: And once Sonic is off his feet, we can discover what's been causing him to run amok!
[Everyone but Amy fist pumps.]

[Scene Change: The desert]

[The X-Tornado flies directly above Sonic.]
Sonic: I've got company!
Amy: [On radio] Target spotted, Chuck.
Chuck: [Over radio] Roger. Stay alert. Don't let him out of your sight.
Amy: [On radio] I'll stay on him.

[Scene Change: The mission room]

[Chuck is watching the radar.]
Chuck: Get ready.

[Scene Change: The desert]

[Amy has prepared a bazooka ready to fire the bomb.]
Chuck: [Over radio] Fire!
[Amy fires the bazooka, and the bomb flies down and hits Sonic.]
Sonic: Yeow!
[Sonic slows to a stop in front of the mission room as the balloon begins to inflate.]
Amy: It really worked!
Sonic: Look guys, I'm flying!
[But the balloon floats too high, and he begins to drifts away.]
Sonic: Hey, get me down! I'm floating away!
Chuck: Perhaps I used too much helium.
[Sonic begins to float over a fast-moving river.]
Sonic: Aaaahhhh! Help me! Somebody get this thing off of me!
[Knuckles is watching from a nearby rock.]
Knuckles: What now?
Sonic: Hey! Knuckles!! Help me! Help me!
[Knuckles throws a small stone at the balloon, causing it to burst. Sonic lands in the water, but immediately begins running on the surface of the water towards Knuckles. He deposits a fish in Knuckles' hands as he runs by.]
Knuckles: What the...?
[He looks down at the fish in his hands.]

[Scene Change: The mission room]

Tanaka: Now what do we do?
Chris: Do you think he'll come back?
Cream: I'm worried...
Amy: It's all my fault.
Chuck: Just too much helium.
[Knuckles approaches, holding the still-wriggling fish.]
Knuckles: Well. Sonic just tried to run me over.
Amy: Great! Did you stop him?
[As Ella prepares stew, Knuckles holds up his fist.]
Knuckles: He missed me, heheh...
[Amy pulls out her hammer.]
Amy: Well, I'm not gonna miss ya!
Knuckles: What's the big deal? All I did was step aside.
Cream: It isn't his fault, Amy.
Cheese: Chao...
[Ella holds up the stew.]
Ella: Cheese is right. I'd bet you could come up with a new way to help Sonic after you've had a nice hot lunch.

[Scene Change: The desert]

[Everyone is sitting on a picnic blanket, eating the stew that Ella made.]
Amy: I bet poor Sonic must be starving by now.
Chuck: I'm sure he's fine, Amy.
[A tumbleweed envelopes Tails and carries him away.]
Cream: That game looks like a lot of fun, Tails.
Cheese: Chao-chao!
Chuck: [Stands up in excitement] That's it!
[A diagram displays his next plan.]
Chuck: Knuckles will wait at the top of a hil with a specially-engineered wheel trap. As Sonic approaches, we'll give the signal, and Knuckles will roll the wheel down the hill, trapping Sonic inside. He'll be like a hamster in a cage!
[Everyone fist pumps. Sonic is running through the desert. An arrow directs him to turn left, which he does. A second arrow points right, and he follows it as well.]
Chuck: All right, Tanaka, he's almost in position.
Tanaka: Right.
[Sonic gradually approaches the mountain.]
Chuck: Roll it!
[Tanaka signals to Knuckles with two flags. The echidna pushes the cage down the mountain. The moment it reaches Sonic, Chuck presses a button that locks the cage in place, and Sonic within the cage. As the cage resembles a hamster wheel, he is now running on the wheel.]
Chris: Hey Grandpa, it works!
Chuck: Of course it does.
[A tray extends out of the cage. it contains a chili dog and a glass of water.]
Amy: I thought you might be hungry after all this running.
[Sonic takes a bite of the chili dog.]
Sonic: Pretty tasty.
[Moments later, he is finished. Sonic yawns.]
Amy: He looks like he's falling asleep!
Chuck: That's good. If he falls asleep, he'll have to stop running.
Amy: Maybe I can help, Sonic! Want me to read you a bedtime story?
Sonic: No, thank you, Amy.

[Scene Change: The Egg Fort II]

Dr. Eggman: That looks like fun! Exercising, I mean. I'm going to start!
Bocoe and Decoe: You should!
Dr. Eggman: Tomorrow.
[He begins eating.]
Bocoe and Decoe: Oh, Dr. Eggman, tomorrow never comes!

[Scene Change: The desert]

[Sonic is still running inside the wheel.]
Chris: Looks like Sonic's nap isn't slowing him down at all. He's going even faster.
Chuck: I've never seen anything like it. His energy is positively boundless.
Ella: Sonic has more power than my food processor.
Chuck: Sonic, that wheel wasn't built to withstand this intensity!
[Strain starts to build on the wheel.]
Tails: Knuckles, look out!
[Suddenly the wheel breaks loose from its frame and rolls towards Knuckles, flattening him. Then the wheel falls on its side. With Sonic still running on the wheel, it begins to drill through the earth. Everyone looks in the resulting hole.]
Chuck: Run!
[Just then a wall of water pushes Sonic out of the hole.]
Chuck: Well, that was a washout.

[Scene Change: The mission room, sunset]

Amy: So far your plans haven't worked, have they?
Chuck: [Arms crossed] Not quite, but I'm confident that if we just keep trying, we'll eventually come up with a plan that will work.
[He glances at Ella, who is applying cream to the injured Knuckles' back.]
Chuck: I've got it!
[The others look at him in disbelief.]
Chuck: In fact, it's the best plan I've had all day. We just need a little help from a friend. Mm-hm.
[He nods for emphasis. That night, Sonic is sleeping while running through the desert.]

[Scene Change: The Egg Fort II]

Dr. Eggman: Sonic is running himself ragged. He must feel as worn out as an old sneaker. This would be a perfect time to launch a sneak attack against him! Ready?
Decoe and Bocoe: [Nod] Aye-aye!
Dr. Eggman: I'll destroy him right after my nap.
[The lights dim]
Bocoe: Please, Doctor!
Decoe: Now is not the time for snoozing!

[Scene Change: The mission room, morning]

[Chuck looks at his watch.]
Chuck: Right on time.
[Just then Sam Speed rolls into the desert, parking right in front of the others. He climbs out of his car.]
Sam: I would've been here sooner, but I stopped for donuts.
Chuck: I appreciate you coming to help us out, Sam.
Sam: You can always count on the Speed King to put the rubber to the road when a friend needs help.
Chuck: [Nods] Well then, let me bring you up to date on our plan.
[The diagram to Chuck's next plan is shown.]
Chuck: Now we all know Sonic has quite a competitive streak, just like you do, Sam.
Sam: It's Speed King, Chuck.
Chuck: Sorry. Speed King. Than plan is to have Speed King challenge Sonic to a test of speed. But unbeknownst to Sonic, a trap will be set at the end of the finish line. Speed King will get on Sonic's right side in lane two. Sonic will be forced to race in lane one beside him, and that will lead him straight into our trap. Then Sonic will be out of the running!
[The diagram shows Sonic stuck in the mud behind the first panel.]
Chuck: Now let's get ready for the race, shall we?
[Everyone fist pumps. With the plan underway, the X-Tornado is tailing Sonic. Amy has a radio with her.]
Amy: [On radio] Stand by. He's almost there.
[Sam is sitting in his car, waiting for his cue.]
Sam: Roger. I'm ready.
Amy: [Over radio] Go!
[Sam takes off, and soon Sonic is running alongside him. Sonic stumbles over a stone and falls behind.]
Sam: What's the matter, slowpoke? Can't you do better than that?
[Sonic tries to pass Sam, but the latter cuts him off.]
Amy: [On radio] What are you doing? This isn't supposed to be a real race! You're supposed to be a decoy!
Sam: [Over radio] Guess again, sweetheart. He beat me once. It's not gonna happen twice.
[Amy shrugs while Sam pulls ahead of Sonic once again.]
Sonic: Oh yeah?

[Scene Change: The mission room]

[Chuck is listening to the transmission.]
Chuck: They're getting close to the finish.
Amy: [Over radio] Remember, Speed King, whatever you do, keep Sonic in the right lane!
Sam: [Over radio] Right lane? I thought I'm in the right lane!

[Scene Change: Desert]

Amy: [On radio] That's right! Just stay in lane two. Remember, you're number two. Number two!
Sam: [On radio] Not me, sister! I'm number one! Hahaha!
[He drives through the number one panel and gets stuck in the mud while Sonic runs through the number two panel and starts running in circles.]
Amy: That didn't work out too well.
Tails: [On radio] Hey Chuck, I'm picking up something weird on my scopes. Do you see it down there too?
Chuck: [Over radio] Yes, I've noticed it myself, Tails.
Tails: [On radio] I recorded the wave patterns. Maybe you can analyze and figure out what it is.

[Scene: The mission room]

Chuck: From what I can gather, it's some kind of strange magnetic force field. It appears to be eminating from that ranch up ahead.

[Scene: The ranch]

[A newly-repaired Lightning Bird is being pursued by a cow as the X-Tornado arrives.]
Amy: Ready up there, Tails?
Tails: I'm ready when you are!
[They locate Lightning Bird.]
Amy: Okay, Tails. Keep it as steady as you can.
[Amy climbs out onto the wing, and is about to smash Lightning Bird with her hammer, but the latter fires an electric net at her. Amy cries out, but the electricy backfires on Lightning Bird. Sonic runs in.]
Sonic: Amy!
[He kicks Lightning Bird into the air, causing it to explode. As he does so, the chip falls out of his ear. He runs into a haystack.]
Amy: Soooniiiic!
[She leaps off the X-Tornado's wing and into the haystack. They both surface.]
Amy: Sonic, I was so worried.
[But Sonic digs in his ear again.]
Amy: Now what's the matter?
Sonic: Something's in my ear again.
[Amy blows some straw out of Sonic's ear.]
Sonic: Yeah, that feels much better. Thanks.
[Sonic lies back, and he and Amy enjoy each other's company. The episode ends.]
Transcripts

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