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Full Tilt Tails
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This is the transcript for the Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog episode, "Full Tilt Tails".

Note: Scenes cut from certain reruns are highlighted in red.

[The episode begins with Scratch and Grounder pulling a cart filled with various items they and Dr. Robotnik stole from the citizens of Mobius. As they pull it across a hill, Robotnik is sitting atop the pile, wearing an inner tube and holding a boombox in both his hands.]

Dr. Robotnik: Tyranny, conquest, dictatorship... get boring. Sometimes I just get a craving for old-fashioned theft!
Scratch: Well, bwhaha! we sure cleaned out that village, your scumminess!
Grounder: Yeah, we stole a lot of swell loot!

[Robotnik is now holding a shoe in his right hand and looking at it though an eyeglass he has in his left eye. He is also holding an alarm clock in his left hand, which falls apart and hits him in the face.]

Robotnik: Ah! You dumbots! All you got is worthless junk!

[Robotnik tosses the shoe at Scratch and the alarm clock at Grounder. It hits them on their heads.]

Scratch: Ow-how-how!
Grounder: Ow!

[Sonic, who is now disguised as a hillbilly, and holding a bindle in his right hand, walks out from behind a tree.]

Sonic: Golly, you sure do gots a lots of neat goodies there. Kind of stuff I always wanted!
Robotnik: Scram, you pesky hillbilly!
Sonic: Okey-dokey! I'll be on my way!

[Sonic tosses what looks and sounds like a piece of gold in his left hand, and catches it in the same hand repeatedly. When Robotnik hears it, he runs up to Sonic.]

Robotnik: Uh, hold on there, my good fellow! This is your lucky day!

[Robotnik runs back to his cart.]

Sonic: Oh, boy! I like lucky days!

[Robotnik, who once again has the eyeglass in his left eye, looks over the piece of gold he is holding in his left hand.]

Robotnik: I'm willing to part with this whole cart full of wonderful ju... I mean, merchandise. You can have it for that tiny sack of dirty gold!

[Sonic looks behind his back, then back at Robotnik. He points to his bindle with his left index finger.]

Sonic: Gee, that whole pile of neat stuff for this little ol' bag?

[Sonic walks up to Robotnik.]

Robotnik: No wonder people say I look just like Santa Claus!

[Robotnik grabs the bindle with his right hand and pulls it away from Sonic. He, Scratch, and Grounder run away with it, laughing evilly. Tails then peers from behind a bush, jumps out of it, and walks up to Sonic.]

Tails: Great work, Sonic! I didn't think he was gonna fall for it!

[Sonic removes his hillbilly disguise with both his hands and tosses it aside.]

Sonic: Just took advantage of his greed!

[Sonic runs up to the cart.]

Sonic: Come on, little buddy! Let's return this stuff to its rightful owners!

[Sonic grabs the cart handles with both his hands and picks them up as Tails jumps into the cart. Sonic spins away, dragging the cart along. The screen then transitions to a view outside Robotnik's fortress as Robotnik laughs evilly.]

Robotnik [heard offscreen]: I really pulled one over on that rube!

[Inside Robotnik's fortress, Robotnik is sitting in his chair near his desk, observing the pile of gold he got from Sonic. Scratch and Grounder look over it as well.]

Robotnik: This sack of gold can finance a whole army of robot soldiers to trample Mobius into submission!
Scratch: You're my hero, Dr. Robotnik, Sir! You're rotten to the core! Bwahaha!

[Robotnik, who is holding the gold in both his hands, dumps them onto his desk.]

Robotnik: Thank you, and to show how much I appreciate you two numbskulls, I'm going to give you a tip!
Scratch: Wow! A ha ha! Great!

[Scratch holds out his right hand, and Grounder hold out both his hands. They both expect Robotnik to give them some of the gold.]

Grounder: Oh, boy! A tip!
Robotnik: The tip is, "Always buy new shoes in the afternoon, after your feet have expanded".

[Scratch and Grounder pull their hands back.]

Scratch: I'll uh, a ha ha, try to remember that.
Grounder: Yeah, me too, in case I ever get feet.

[Robotnik is now sitting upside down in his chair, holding a piece of the gold in his right hand.]

Robotnik: I bet this nugget alone is worth...

[Robotnik sniffs the piece of gold.]

Robotnik: Mmmm, strange. Smells like... chili beans!

[Robotnik sits back right-side-up, and bites the piece of gold, discovering it, along with the other pieces of gold, are stale chili beans painted gold.]

Robotnik: It is chili beans! Stale chili beans! Covered with gold paint!

[Robotnik pushes the chili beans away with his right hand. Some of them land on Grounder's head, which Grounder now peers out.]

Grounder: That was a pretty tricky hillbilly.

[Grounder grabs the chili beans on his head with both his hands and pulls them away.]

Robotnik [heard offscreen]: Coconuts!

[The door opens, and Coconuts runs to Robotnik through the doorway.]

Coconuts: You want me, your putridness? You want me?
Robotnik: I was bamboozled by Sonic, and it's all your fault!

[Robotnik points at Coconuts with his left index finger, and Coconuts stops near Robotnik's left index finger, which his nose touches.]

Coconuts: Owf! What are you talking about? I wasn't even there!

[Robotnik moves his head down at Coconuts.]

Robotnik: Shut up! I'm the boss, I can blame whoever I want! I'm demoting you to mop-up duty!

[Robotnik points his right index finger at Coconuts.]

Coconuts: B-b-b-but... where do I start?
Robotnik: By standing on that "X"!

[Robotnik points to the "X" with both his index fingers. The "X" is revealed to be on a trap door, which Coconuts walks onto. Robotnik twiddles his thumbs, then pulls the lever next to him with his right hand.]

Robotnik: Ah!

[The trap door opens, and Coconuts falls through it.]

Coconuts: Not again!

[The trap door closes, and Robotnik walks away.]

Robotnik: If it's the last thing I do, I'm gonna get even with that scheme-stopping, spine-headed hedgehog!

[The screen transitions to the next scene, which takes place on the porch of the house of an Elderly Goat Couple. They are both sitting in rocking chairs, and the man is holding a pitchfork in his right hand.]

Robotnik [heard offscreen]: Aren't they the most peaceful, pleasant, harmless couple of old folks you ever saw?

[Robotnik, Scratch, and Grounder are revealed to be spying on them from the Egg-O-Matic hovercraft. Specifically, Robotnik is looking through a telescope he is holding in both his hands.]

Grounder: Awww, they sure are!
Scratch: Couldn't harm a fly!
Robotnik: That's why we're gonna attack them! Ha ha ha ha ha!

[The Egg-O-Artillery Attack tank, a giant tank with two cannons, is now shown.]

Robotnik [heard offscreen]: Thanks to my new Egg-o-Artillery Attack Tank!

[Robotnik lands the Egg-O-Matic near the Tank. As he talks, he points to the far side of the canyon, then to the Elderly Goat Couple's house with his right index finger.]

Robotnik: We're going to blast away the far side of the canyon, sending an avalanche of rocks down on those unsuspecting fogeys!

[The Elderly Goat Man waves with his left arm, and the Elderly Goat Lady waves with her right. It is then revealed that they are waving back to Scratch and Grounder, who are both waving with their right arms.]

Robotnik: Ah! Stop that waving!

[Robotnik hits Grounder with his right hand, Scratch with his left, then Grounder with his right hand again.]

Grounder: Ugh!
Scratch: Oof!
Grounder: Ugh!
Robotnik: They're the enemy!
Scratch: But how will we stop Sonic from saving them?

[The Egg-O-Matic flies into the air. A view inside the canyon is shown.]

Robotnik [heard offscreen]: This is the only way into the canyon, and it's booby-trapped!.

[A view of a mattress tied to several ropes nailed to the canyon is shown.]

Robotnik [heard offscreen]: This elastic canyon closer will slow him down,

[A view of a giant spider web covered in slime in the canyon is now shown.]

Robotnik: And when he hits this web of gooey, gunky cords, he'll stick like a fly in a spider web!

[Robotnik flies the Egg-O-Matic over the spider web.]

Robotnik: Ya ha ha ha ha ha! Not even Sonic is fast enough to break through these obstacles!
Grounder: Are we?
Robotnik: Of course not! Why do you ask?

[A view of the Egg-O-Matic's fuel gauge, with the needle on "E", is now shown.]

Grounder: Um, cause I forgot to fill the gas tank, and we're out of fuel!

[The Egg-O-Matic starts falling.]

Robotnik: No!
Scratch: Yeow-how-how!
Grounder: No!

[The Egg-O-Matic gets caught by the spider web, then continues falling.]

Scratch: Whoa! That was lucky!
Grounder: Yeah! Ha ha! We'd have been stuck in that web forever!

[The Egg-O-Matic lands with a crash and explodes.]

Robotnik: Oh!
Scratch: Ow-how-how!

[The dust cloud formed by the explosion clears, and Robotnik is now outside the destroyed Egg-O-Matic.]

Robotnik: I wanna catch Sonic so bad! Then I can dismantle these stupid robots once and for all!

[Robotnik slams his left fist on Grounder's head twice and his right fist on Scratch's head twice. He then slams his left fist on Scratch's head. The screen transitions to the next scene, where Robotnik is standing outside the tank, and Scratch and Grounder are in it, peering out from the hatches.]

Robotnik: Let's get on with it!
Scratch and Grounder: Yes, your nastiness!

[Scratch pulls his hatch down with his left hand, and Grounder pulls his hatch down with his left drill. Robotnik then points to the far side of the canyon with his right index finger.]

Robotnik: Fire!

[Scratch and Grounder fire at the canyon, causing an avalanche. The Elderly Goat Couple looks up at the avalanche and stares in shock, screaming. The screen then transitions to Sonic, who is standing near a finish line, and holding a stopwatch in his left hand, which he is looking at.]

Sonic: Good going, Tails! Lift those knees!

[Tails, who is now wearing a red headband and a green pair of shorts (which he continues to wear for the rest of the episode), runs through the finish line.]

Sonic: Hey, you knocked a second off your last time!

[Tails, who is panting heavily and holding his stomach with both his hands, walks up to Sonic.]

Tails: Am I ever gonna be as fast as you?

[Sonic walks up to Tails and puts his right arm around Tails' right shoulder.]

Sonic: Maybe, maybe not, keed, but give it your best shot, cause if you try your hardest, whether you end up the best or not, you're a hero! One more lap now, and you can use your tails this time.
Elderly Goat Couple [heard offscreen]: Sonic!
Sonic: Practice is cancelled, kid! This is for real!

[Sonic runs away, and Tails follows behind him.]

Tails: Sonic! Wait up!

[The avalanche continues to fall towards the Elderly Goat Couple. The Elderly Goat Man has his arms around the Elderly Goat Lady's shoulders.]

Elderly Goat Couple: Help!

[Robotnik looks down through the telescope he is holding in both his hands.]

Robotnik: Here comes Sonic, just as I planned!

[A view through Robotnik's telescope is shown. Sonic runs past, with Tails wearily running behind him. Sonic then jumps onto the mattress and pushes it back towards the spider web.]

Robotnik [heard offscreen]: The elastic canyon holder is closing!
Sonic: I think this is a trap! But it's not me it's gonna catch!

[Sonic manages to break the spider web from the canyon, then he catches the avalance in the mattress. He lets it go, then the mattress launches the avalanche aside, causing it to land on the ground and form a perfect pyramid. Sonic then falls down and lands near the Elderly Goat Couple, who are covering their eyes with their hands.]

Sonic: You can look now, it's safe!

[The Elderly Goat Couple uncover their eyes.]

Elderly Goat Man: Sonic!
Elderly Goat Lady: You saved us!
Sonic: Hey, If I thought you were in any real danger, I would have rushed!

[Robotnik has witnessed the entire event through his telescope, and pulls it down with his left hand.]

Robotnik: I-hit's not fair! That hedgehog's too fast!

[Robotnik breaks the telescope in half by pressing it against his right knee.]

Grounder: Don't worry, your rottenness, I'll blast another round!

[Grounder pulls down his hatch with his right drill, and Scratch pulls down his hatch with his right hand. Robotnik then runs up to the tank.]

Robotnik: No, you fabricated fool!

[Scratch and Grounder fire a missile from the tank, which bounces off the mattress, and flies back towards the tank. Robotnik ducks, holding his head with both his hands, and the missile destroys the tank, which is now in pieces. Scratch and Grounder's pieces, including Grounder's head, land near Robotnik.]

Grounder: Congratulations, Dr. Robotnik, Sir! You sure build great ammunition!

[Tails, who is still panting heavily, runs up to Sonic.]

Tails: I'm here, Sonic! Can I help with the rescue?

[Sonic puts his hands on Tails' shoulders.]

Sonic: Sorry, keed! Sure could have used your help, but everything's okay now!

[Tails kicks a pebble with his right foot furiously.]

Tails: I'm never in time for the fun stuff! Face it, I'm a slow-mo!

[Tails walks away.]

Sonic: Hey, keed, cheer up! You're already the fastest two-tailed orange fox I know!

[The screen then transitions to a view outside Robotnik's fortress.]

Robotnik [heard offscreen]: That does it! I'm never gonna slow that hedgehog down enough to catch him!

[Inside Robotnik's fotress, Robotnik is pacing angrily near Scratch and Grounder.]

Grounder: But, you're the most vile, mean, evil guy Mobius has ever seen! You gotta slow Sonic down!
Robotnik: No!
Scratch: Bwa!
Robotnik: I'm done trying!

[Scratch kneels down and grabs Robotnik's right leg with both his hands.]

Robotnik: Whoa!
Scratch: Don't say it, boss! Don't give up!

[Robotnik picks Scratch up by his comb with his right hand. Scratch tries to run away, but he can't.]

Robotnik: I didn't say I wasn't going to catch Sonic!

[Robotnik throws Scratch down.]

Scratch: Oh-ho-ho!

[Scratch gets up and wipes his head with his right hand.]

Scratch: Whoa-ho! That's a relief!
Grounder: But, if you can't slow Sonic down, how you gonna catch him?
Robotnik: I'm gonna make my Super Special Sonic Search and Smash Squad faster!
Grounder: That's us!
Scratch: You're gonna make us faster?

[Robotnik opens a drawer with his right hand and pulls out a box in it with his left hand.]

Robotnik: I have here my latest scientific breakthrough!

[Scratch and Grounder walk up to Robotnik, who is holding the box in his left hand.]

Scratch: In that teeny, little box?

[Robotnik puts his right hand on the box's lid.]

Robotnik: This is the greatest development in the field of hedgehog hunting ever devised!

[Robotnik opens the box's lid with his right hand, then closes it.]

Robotnik: Do you fully grasp the magnitude of what I'm about to show you?
Grounder: Um, magnitude. Magnitude. Uh, that's small, right? Uh, I-I mean, yeah, to fit in a box!

[Robotnik walks away.]

Robotnik: Small, yes, but precious!

[Robotnik walks up to a giant screen. The screen shows an image of a mine with a sign that says, BIG R MINE over the entrance. The sun near it is wearing a mining helmet, and many robot miners are walking through the entrance]

Robotnik: A thousand robot miners toiled for years to collect the raw materials.

[An image of a factory is snow shown on the screen.]

Robotnik: It took millions of robot hours to distill enough concentrated compound to create this one-of-a-kind,

[Robotnik is now holding the box in his right hand and a piece of speedamint gum in his left.]

Robotnik: Impossible-to-duplicate weapon! It's a miracle! It's genius! It's...
Scratch and Grounder: Chewing gum?

[Robotnik walks up to Scratch and Grounder and points to the speedamint gum he is holding in his left hand with his right index finger.]

Robotnik: It's speedamint gum! When chewed, it emits velocity vibes!
Scratch: Velocity...
Grounder: ...vibes?
Robotnik: Yes! Whoever posesses my speedamint gum gets speed! Enough speed to leave Sonic in the dust!
Scratch: And we possess it!
Grounder: Better than that, we got it right here!
Scratch: We're gonna go faster than Sonic! Bwahahaha!
Grounder: Yeah!
Scratch: Bwahaha!
Grounder: Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

[The screen transitions to the next scene, which takes place at a desert. Grounder, who is now wearing a red helmet with a white stripe in the middle, is now standing between Scratch and Robotnik.]

Robotnik: This is the perfect place to test run the speedamint gum! You're gonna break the Mobius Land Speed Record today, Grounder!
Grounder: I'm ready, your villianousness!

[Robotnik is now holding the box with the speedamint gum in his left hand and pulls the speedamint gum out with his right hand.]

Robotnik: Open wide!

[Grounder opens his mouth wide, and Robotnik puts the speedamint gum in his mouth.]

Robotnik [heard offscreen]: Chew it up good!

[Grounder chews the speedamint gum, and the effects take place.]

Grounder: Wow! Velocity vibes!

[Robotnik is now holding a checkered flag in his right hand.]

Robotnik: Now, let's see what you can do! Go!

[Robotnik waves the checkered flag, and Grounder rolls in place, creating a cloud of dust. He then rolls away really fast.]

Scratch: Whoa-ho-ho! Look at him go!

[Grounder rolls between Robotnik and Scratch really fast, spinning them around.]

Scratch: Whoa-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!
Robotnik: Whoa!

[Robotnik and Scratch stop spinning.]

Robotnik: That's one lap of Mobius!
Grounder: This is great!

[Grounder's chest compartment opens, and Grounder turns his ;eft drill into his right hand, pulls out his robocom phone, and holds it up to his head.]

Grounder: Dr. Robotnik, it works! Ha ha! I'm faster than Sonic!

[Robotnik is now holding a phone in his left hand and holds it up to his left ear.]

Robotnik: Good! Now, use the braking chute and report back!
Grounder: Yes, sir! Brake chute!

[Grounder's back compartment opens, and a parachute emits from it. The parachute then rips open.]

Grounder [heard offscreen]: Chute broke!

[Grounder is now flying through the air.]

Grounder: [screams] Everything broke!

[Grounder then crashes into a tree.]

Grounder: Ugh!

[The speedamint gum flies out of Grounder's mouth and lands on the ground. Grounder then pulls himself out of the tree.]

Grounder: B-b-b-bll, that's what I call velocity vibes!

[Grounder literally falls to pieces.]

Robotnik [heard over the phone]: And whatever you do, don't lose that speedamint gum!
Grounder: Huh? I don't even know where my teeth are!

[The screen then transitions to the next scene, where Tails is running in place through the forest, panting.]

Tails: If I'm ever gonna be fast on my feet like Sonic, I gotta keep training! Sonic says, you gotta think fast, train fast, and be fast!

[Tails runs away. He steps on the speedamint gum with his left foot, and it sticks to his left shoe. The effects take place over him, and he starts running in place faster.]

Tails: Sonic was right! Training is really paying off!

[Tails runs away. He runs through the forest, then screeches to a halt.]

Tails: This is great! I've gotta tell Sonic!

[Tails runs away, up the hill. Sonic is running down the other way.]

Tails: Sonic!

[Sonic and Tails run and bump into each other.]

Sonic: Oof!
Tails: Oof!

[Stars spin around Sonic and Tails' heads. Sonic holds his head with his right hand, and Tails holds his head with his left hand.]

Sonic: What hit me?
Tails: I did!
Sonic: Stop kidding! Whatever that was, it was going like... uh, me!
Tails: It was me! Look!

[Tails runs in place, runs away, then runs back to Sonic.]

Tails: I got speed! Sonic speed!

[Sonic scratches his head with his left index finger.]

Sonic: That's amazing! I mean, uh, that's great! I mean, how'd that happen?
Tails: Guess all that training paid off!

[Just then, a train whistle can be head in the distance.]

Tails: Watch, I'll race that train!
Sonic: Don't you think you might be jumping the gun?
Tails: Yeah! At last!

[Tails runs in place, then runs away.]

Sonic: Tails, wait up! Those are three words I thought I'd never hear myself say.

[An engine, a 4-4-0 engine or an American type steam locomotive, with a coal tender, and pulling a coach can be seen crossing a bridge. Tails runs past the engine, then stops at a distance.]

Tails: Awesome! Sonic, I'm waiting!

[Tails taps his right foot, then giggles. He suddenly stops giggling when he gets his left foot stuck in the tracks.]

Tails: Uh-oh! Ugh!

[Tails tries to pull his left foot out of the tracks, but finds that to no avail, that he is stuck. The engine gets closer to him. Tails then tries to pull himself out of the tracks by flying out, but is still stuck to no avail.]

Tails: I'm trapped!

[The engine gets closer to Tails and blows its whistle four times. The screen then fades to black. The next scene continues where the last one left off. The engine blows its whistle three more times as Tails struggles to get out of the tracks, but is still stuck. The engine gets even closer to Tails, who is trying to pull his left foot out of the tracks with both his hands, but still remains stuck to no avail.]

Tails: I know I can run fast, and I can fly fast. Now I gotta think fast!

[Tails touches his head with his left index finger.]

Tails: I know! Sonic! Help!

[As the engine gets even closer to Tails, Sonic runs up to Tails.]

Sonic: I'll get you out before you can shake a leg! Of course, it would help if you could shake your leg.

[The engine gets even closer to Tails.]

Sonic: Hang tight, keed!

[Sonic runs away, then comes back with various wood planks, which he uses to build a bridge for the engine to travel on above Tails. The engine travels over the bridge, then Sonic attempts to pull Tails' left foot out of the track with both his hands.]

Sonic: Tails, I think it's great that you're fast now,
Tails: Thanks!
Sonic: Just don't be in such a hurry to get yourself hurt! It's not just enough to be fast, you have to learn to be good at fast, and that takes time and practice.

[At last, Sonic manages to pull Tails' left foot out of the tracks with both his hands. The screen then transitions to the next scene, where Sonic and Tails are sitting at a picnic table at the top of a hill.]

Sonic: You know, keed, there's also a lot of responsibility to being fast.
Tails: There is?
Sonic: Sure! It's not just for showing off, it's for doin' good!

[Tails points to Sonic with his right index finger.]

Tails: But you show off!
Sonic: Yeah, well... but only while I'm doing good!

[Tails jumps onto the picnic table.]

Tails: Then I'm gonna do good, too!
Sonic: Atta boy!
Tails: Cause I got a lot of showing off to catch up on!

[Tails runs away.]

Sonic: Tails, slow down! I'm never gonna get used to saying that!

[The screen transitions to the next scene, which takes place at Robotnik's fortress, where Robotnik is scolding Scratch and Grounder for losing his speedamint gum.]

Robotnik: You lost my speedamint gum?!

[Scratch is standing next to Grounder, whose pieces are all in a shopping cart, which Robotnik points to with his left index finger.]

Robotnik: You managed to find all these wortless parts, but my precious speedamint gum is lost?!
Grounder: Duh, we looked everywhere, your ruthlessness! Honest!

[Robotnik grabs Grounder's nose with his right hand.]

Robotnik: Watch your mouth!
Grounder: Oh!
Robotnik: I didn't build you to be honest!

[Robotnik pulls Grounder's head out of the shopping cart, then tosses it back in.]

Grounder: Ugh!
Robotnik: Go steal, lie, connive, and harass until you find my speedamint gum!

[Robotnik kicks the shopping cart with Grounder's pieces in it with his right foot, causing it to roll across the hall, and down a set of stairs, which Scratch walks up to.]

Grounder: [screams] Whoa!
Scratch: We'll get it back, your heftiness! We promise!
Robotnik: Don't give me that! I programmed you to break promises!

[The screen transitions to the next scene, where Tails is flying through the sky.]

Tails: I'm fast, and I'm ready! All I need now is someone to help! Gee, Sonic never has to wait around to rescue someone!

[A plane flies past Tails, spinning him around.]

Tails: Whoa!

[Tails stops spinning, and points at the plane with his right index finger.]

Tails: Hey! Your hatch is open! That's dangerous! Maybe they need help!

[Just then, a Cat Daredevil jumps out of the plane.]

Tails: I knew there was trouble! Don't worry, I'll save you!

[Tails flies towards the Daredevil.]

Daredevil: I beg your pardon, old chap?
Tails: Hang on!
Daredevil: To what, old bean?
Tails: To me!

[The Daredevil crosses his arms.]

Daredevil: I'll do nothing of the sort!

[Tails holds out his right hand.]

Tails: Don't be nuts! I'm not gonna let you go splatola!
Deredevil: You fool! Leave me be!
Tails: Gee, some people can be so picky about who they let rescue them!

[Tails grabs the Daredevil's shoulders with both his hands, slowing his fall.]

Daredevil: I say, what are you doing?
Tails: I got ya!
Daredevil: D'oh, you pest, you're ruining everything!
Tails: Huh?

[Below, a target can be seen near a red arrow, and two signs, one that says, JUMP in red letters, and one that says, YEA! in black letters.]

Daredevil [heard offscreen]: This is the Mobius International Daredevil's Competition!

[Just then, several other daredevils fly past Tails and the Daredevil on their parachutes.]

Daredevil: And I was winning the parachute freefall event, but now you've made me lose!

[The Daredevil reaches in his coat pocket with his right hand and pulls out his parachute cord. His parachute opens, and he flies away.]

Tails: Oh. Gee, sorry!

[The Citizens of Mobius boo and jeer as Tails lands on the target. Tails then runs away as Sonic runs in.]

Sonic: Hi, any of you seen a little orange fox with two tails who's faster than the dickens?

[The Daredevil walks up to Sonic.]

Daredevil: Yes, he only just ruined our entire event! Friend of his, are you?

[Sonic begins sweating nervously as he points to himself with his right thumb.]

Sonic: Me, uh, friend of a little orange fox with, uh... ah, never heard of him!

[Sonic runs away. The screen then transitions to the next scene, where Sonic runs through the desert.]

Sonic: I gotta put the brakes on Tails before he makes any more enemies!

[Sonic continues running through the desert. The screen then transitions to a view of the forest where Grounder lost the speedamint gum. Scratch and Grounder, the latter of which has swapped out his left drill for a magnifying glass, which he is looking through, are looking for the speedamint gum.]

Sonic [heard offscreen]: Those robo-goons!

[Sonic is revealed to be hiding behind a tree.]

Sonic: I wonder what they're up to!
Grounder: The speedermint gum's gotta be here somewhere!

[Scratch has his head in a tree.]

Scratch: A ha ha! I think I found it!

[Scratch pulls his head out of the tree and reaches in it with his left hand.]

Scratch: It's gooey, icky, nasty, and sticky!
Grounder: Heh heh! I did chew it up real good!

[Scratch pulls out some tree sap.]

Scratch: Sap!
Grounder: You calling me a sap?!
Scratch: No, sap!

[Scratch stretches the sap with both his hands.]

Grounder: Stop calling me that!
Scratch: It's sap from the tree! I'm not calling you a sap!
Grounder: You're not?
Scratch: No! I'm calling you an idiot!
Grounder: Aww, Scratch, you're so sweet!

[Tails runs through the forest and past Scratch and Grounder, spinning them around.]

Scratch: Oh-ho-ho!
Grounder: Ow! That didn't look like Sonic!
Scratch: It wasn't! It was his pesky pal, Tails!
Grounder: Going that fast?

[Scratch stops spinning.]

Scratch: I-hit can only mean...

[Grounder stops spinning, and Scratch points at Tails with his right index finger.]

Scratch and Grounder: He's got the gum!
Scratch: After him!

[Scratch and Grounder walk after Tails.]

Sonic [heard offscreen]: Speedermint gum, eh? So that's it! Those robo-bums are after Tails! And he's gonna need me! If I can catch up with him, that is!

[Sonic runs away. The screen then transitions to the next scene, which takes place outside a café, which has two signs on it; one that says, CAFE in blue letters, and one that says, OFFCE in blue letters. There are also many motorcycles parked outside the café. Tails stops at the café.]

Tails: No trouble here, either! It's no fair! Now that I've got speed, there's nobody to rescue! And I'm not going back to Sonic till' I prove myself!

[Tails walks away, and Grounder rolls up to where he was. His chest compartment opens, and he turns his right drill into a hand, which he uses to pull out his robocom phone and hold it up to his head.]

Grounder: We found the speedermint gum, Dr. Robotnik! Tails has it!

[Meanwhile, Robotnik is flying his Egg-O-Matic through the desert, and is holding the phone in his right hand.]

Robotnik: Congratulations! For once, you've almost accomplished your task!

[Back at the café, Scratch and Grounder listen in on Robotnik..]

Robotnik [heard over the phone]: Now put plan B into action!

[Grounder turns to face Scratch.]

Grounder: Plan B?

[Grounder's robocom phone sprouts a mouth, which Robotnik yells through.]

Robotnik [heard over the phone]: Yes! Plan B is "Bash the brat with the bully", you boobs!
Scratch: Of course! I knew that!
Grounder: I knew it first!

[Tails is now standing near a motorcycle, looking for someone to help.]

Grounder [heard offscreen]: Help!

[Tails gasps and turns his head towards Grounder.]

Grounder [heard offscreen]: Help! Please help me!
Tails: At last, a chance to help somebody!

[Tails walks towards Grounder, who is wearing a blonde wig and holding a lollipop stick in his right hand.]

Tails: What's the matter, little girl?
Grounder: Bad man in there steal my lollipop, and he left me only my stick!

[Grounder cries.]

Tails: What bad man?

[Grounder points to the entrance of the café with his right index finger.]

Grounder: In there! He's wearing leather!
Tails: Don't worry, I'll get your lollipop back!

[Tails points to himself with his left thumb, and runs into the cafe. Scratch then peers in next to Grounder.]

Scratch: Tails may be fast, but he's not strong! Those bikers will wipe the floor with him! Bwahaha!
Grounder: Yeah, ha ha ha! Then we step in to pick up the pieces! Uh... of gum.

[Tails pushes the doors of the entrance to the café with both his hands, walks in, and pulls up his pants with both his hands.]

Tails: Okay, I want...

[Before Tails can finish, Grounder rolls in and points at him with his left index finger.]

Grounder: He stole my lollipop!
Tails: [screams]

[Grounder cries, and Tails gasps. A Biker, who is a bulldog with a blue leather jacket, a spiked hat, a spiked collar, and spiked bracelets, hears Grounder's cry for help.]

Biker: Duh, uh, that's terrible!

[The Biker turns towards Tails.]

Tails: Bu...but...

[The Biker walks towards Tails and growls at him as he smacks his left fist with his right hand.]

Biker: You better talk fast, sonny!
Tails: I... I... I... but...

[Tails points outside with his right index finger. He sees Scratch and Grounder at the end of the motorcycles. Scratch points at Tails with his left index finger as Grounder removes his wig with his right hand.]

Tails: Those rotten robots! They tricked me!

[Tails looks back at the biker.]

Tails: [screams]

[The Biker roars and runs at Tails.]

Tails: Yeow!

[The Biker pulls Tails' left shoe with the speedamint gum off with his left hand. Tails falls off the stairs and lands on the ground below.]

Tails: Ugh!

[The Biker looks at the speedamint gum on Tails' left shoe and tosses the shoe aside and roars. Tails tries to run away, but trips.]

Tails: Whoa! Ugh! What happened to my.. my speed?

[The Biker runs up to Tails and looks down at him. Tails points at him with his left index finger.]

Tails: Hey, guy, let's not not be hasty!

[Tails moves out of the way just in time as the Biker attempts to punch him with his left fist. The Biker misses, and Tails bumps into a motorcycle, knocking it over, and causing it to knock the other motorcycles over like a bunch of dominoes. The last one falls on Scratch and Grounder, flattening them.]

Scratch: Oh-ho-ho!
Grounder: Ow!
Scratch [heard under the motorcycle]: Get it off of me! Ow-how-how!

[The Biker walks up to the motorcycle, picks it up with his left hand, and tosses it aside.]

Biker: Hey! You're not a little girl! Duh, you broke my motorcycle! I hate robots!

[In the distance, Tails watches as the Biker beats up Scratch and Grounder, who scream in pain. He covers his eyes with both his hands as Sonic runs up to him.]

Sonic: Hey, keed!

[Tails turns to face Sonic.]

Tails: Sonic!
Sonic: I came to help you, Tails, but I guess I got here a little late, and I hate when that happens!

[Sonic points to himself with his left thumb.]

Tails: I'm not fast anymore! I don't know what happened!

[Sonic looks down and sees Tails isn't wearing his left shoe with the speedamint gum on it anymore.]

Sonic [heard offscreen]: You stepped in some gum!
Tails: Huh?
Sonic: I'll explain it to you later.

[The screen transitions to the next scene, where Sonic and Tails are walking across the desert together.]

Tails: Sonic, how come when I got what I always wanted, more than anything else, everything went wrong?
Sonic: Sometimes, you're just not ready for what you want most, but I bet you'll grow up and you'll be ready! You may even be as fast as me!
Tails: I guess. No hurry, though!
Sonic: But even if you're never as fast as me, you're the greatest, keed! You're a great flyer, a great guy, and above all, the greatest friend I could ever hope for!
Tails: Thanks, Sonic!

[Meanwhile, Robotnik flies his Egg-O-Matic towards Tails' left shoe with the speedamint gum on it.

Robotnik: Aha! My precious speedamint gum! Its mine! All mine!

[Robotnik flies his Egg-O-Matic into the ground, launching Tails' left shoe with the speedamint gum into the air. Meanwhile, a Turtle walks across the desert, and Tails' right shoe lands in front of him. He pulls the speedamint gum off the shoe with his mouth and eats it. The effects take place over him, and Robotnik walks up to him, furious that he ate the speedamint gum.]

Robotnik: No! No, no! I hate turtles, I hate Tails, I hate that hedgehog!

[The Turtle runs in place, then runs away. He can then be seen running across the desert.]

Turtle: Wow! Look at me go! Where's that hare? I'm ready to race! I'm a speed demon! I'm fast! Wow!

[The Turtle runs across the desert, and the screen fades to black, ending the episode.]

Sonic Says[]

[Tails picks up a box of cigarettes with his right hand, and Grounder rolls up to him.]

Grounder: Gimme my smokes!

[Grounder grabs the box of cigarettes with his right hand and pulls a cigarette out of it with his mouth. He then uses the lighter in his right hand to light the cigarette. Tails points at him with his right index finger.]

Tails: Smokin's bad for you, you know!
:Grounder: No, it's not! Try it!

[Tails pulls a cigarette out of the box with his left hand, and Grounder lights the cigarette with his lighter. Tails smokes the cigarette and coughs violently. Sonic then runs up to him, takes the cigarette from him with his left hand, tosses it onto the ground, and stomps on it with his left foot.]

Sonic: Whoa, little bro! That smoke'll make you choke!
Grounder: It doesn't make me...

[Before Grounder can finish, he swallows the cigarette, chokes on it, and coughs. His face turns pale.]

Sonic [heard offscreen]: Smoking is for dumbots! [to the viewers] It's bad for your health, and it stains your teeth!

[Grounder rolls past Sonic.]

Sonic [to the viewers]: So don't be a fool! Smoking isn't cool!
Transcripts

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