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Eggman's Brother (transcript)

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This is the transcript of the Sonic Boom episode, "Eggman's Brother".

[Scene: Seaside Island, beach, day.]

[Everyone is relaxing on the beach. The Child Monkey, the Reindeer Girl and Beth the Shrew are playfully chasing each other. Stratford is making sand-castles. Sonic is relaxing on a sunbed when Eggman shows up, wearing his swimsuit, an orange bathing cap, and a pink, unicorn-shaped swim ring.]
Dr. Eggman: You stole my spot, Sand-hog.
Sonic: There wasn't anybody using it when we got here.
Dr. Eggman: I got up to get a slice and some water ice. I left Scorpion Bot to hold my spot. [Turns to Scorpion Bot] There's only one way to make this up to me, Scorpion Bot. You know what to do.
[Scorpion Bot raises a bottle of soda.]
Dr. Eggman: No, you dunderhead. Attack!
[Scorpion Bot shoots its flamethrower at Team Sonic, forcing them to get out of the way. The flame destroys Stratford's sandcastles. Crab Bots emerge out of the sand to attack Team Sonic. Sonic Homing Attacks them, along with a Scorpion Bot that Amy was about to hit with her hammer.]
Amy: Hey! I had that one!
[Knuckles prepares to punch another Crab Bot, but Sonic defeats it before he can, leaving Knuckles to punch thin air and spin round. Tails and Sticks prepare to attack their respective Crab Bots, but Sonic defeats them before they can as well, with Tails getting caught in the Crab Bot's destruction and getting blown into the sand.]
Tails: [Coughs] Thanks, I guess...
[Sonic whips up some sand around Eggman, trapping him in a pile of sand.]
Sonic: Ta-da!
[The rest of Team Sonic grunt in anger at Sonic.]
Sonic: What?
Knuckles: You know how much I like smashing stuff, Sonic. Why didn't you let me smash stuff?!
Amy: We're supposed to be a team.
Sonic: Sometimes it's more efficient for me to do some stuff myself.
[The rest of Team Sonic groan at Sonic.]

[Scene Change: Eggman's Lair, HQ room, day.]

[Eggman gets changed behind a screen while grumbling.]
Dr. Eggman: [Throws away his water ring] I got sand in every crevice. I'll be washing it out for weeks. [Looks at Orbot and Cubot] And by I, I mean you.
[Orbot and Cubot shudder at Eggman. A doorbell rings and Eggman panics.]
Dr. Eggman: [High-pitch] Just a second! I'm not decent!

[Scene Change: Eggman's Lair, hallway, day.]

[Eggman presses the button that opens the door. Dramatic music plays as Morpho shows up.]
Cubot: [Nervous] Oh no, there's two of them. Which one do I shoot?
[Cubot brings out a Disintegrator Ray and aims between Eggman and Morpho. Orbot knocks the Disintegrator Ray out of Cubot's hands.]
Morpho: Brother! [Hugs Eggman]
Dr. Eggman: [Pushes Morpho off] Who the snap are you?
Morpho: Steve Eggman. Your long-lost brother!

[Scene Change: Eggman's Lair, living room/lab, day.]

[Morpho looks around the lair. He touches some of Eggman's weapons.]
Morpho: Wow. Nice place you got here. Does that couch fold out into a bed?
Dr. Eggman: [Snaps] No! [Normally] I mean, yes but you're not staying. I can't be bothered with highly improbable family reunions. I've got a lot of evil plans to hatch against Team Sonic.
Morpho: Oh I can help. I've got some special abilities that might come in handy.
Dr. Eggman: Here's the thing. Steve is it? There's only two ways this can go. A: You're a fake and can't be trusted; or B: You're really my brother, and you're definitely can't be trusted. So, scram.
[Eggman pushes Morpho towards the door.]
Morpho: You're making a big mistake. I'll prove it to you, you'll see!
[Eggman slams the door in his face.]
Dr. Eggman: Sure sounds like he could be my brother.

[Scene Change: Village Center, day.]

[Sonic is reading a newspaper on the bench. He spots Morpho walking along.]
Sonic: Yo, Egghead. [Chuckles] What's with the hairpiece?
Morpho: You must be confusing me with my lousy good-for-nothing brother. I'm Steve Eggman.
Sonic: Really? The least you could do is get a better disguise.
[Eggman and Decimator Bot arrive, with Eggman riding the Eggmobile.]
Dr. Eggman: Sonic, there you are. [Spots Morpho] Oh great. What are you doing here?
Morpho: I was minding my own business until your ugly face showed up!
Dr. Eggman: [Jumps off the Eggmobile and confronts Morpho] You're the ugly one, with that dopy luxurious blonde hair!
Morpho: Jealous much, cue ball?
[Eggman grunts and begins trading handslaps with Morpho.]
Dr. Eggman: Stop it. You're ruining my life!
[Eggman and Morpho wressle around. Eggman gives Morpho a nuggie.]
Morpho: Stop it!
[Eggman pushes Morpho out of the way and presses a button on his wrist controller, activating Decimator Bot.]
Sonic: I was wondering when you were gonna get back to me. Time to take out this wandering scrapheap.
[Sonic jumps off the bench, dodges a laser from Decimator Bot and Homing attacks Decimator Bot. Decimator fires a freeze beam at Sonic's feet after he lands, trapping Sonic and making him shiver. Morpho picks up a rock and breaks the ice to free Sonic.]
Sonic: Wow. Thanks Steve!
[Sonic Homing Attacks Decimator Bot three times, knocking its head off and making its body collapse on the ground.]
Dr. Eggman: I knew you couldn't be trusted.
[Eggman calls the Eggmobile from his wrist controller and flees. Morpho and Sonic fist bump each other.]
Sonic: Yeah!
Morpho: Oh yea.

[Scene Change: Meh Burger, day.]

[Team Sonic is sitting at a table.]
Sonic: Guys. You won't believe it. I met Eggman's long-lost brother. He rescued me from an ice block.
Morpho: Whahaha!
[Everyone turns around and looks at Morpho in a superhero outfit. ]
Morpho: Hey, Sonic. Check out my new costume! Figures I'd need some new gear since I'm joining your team.
Amy: Sonic, what's he talking about?
Sonic: Now when Steve here saved me from Decimator Bot, I asked him to join up with us.
Morpho: Whahaha.
Knuckles: I don't trust this guy. He reminds me of someone... I just can't figure out who.
Amy: You really should have consulted us.
[An explosion is heard.]
Tails: [Looks at his Communicator.] Whoa. A volcano just erupted outside the town.
[Team Sonic and Morpho leave Meh Burger.]

[Scene Change: Gogoba Village, day]

[Team Sonic and Morpho run over to the volcano site. They spot Gogobas stuck on a rock with molten lava surrounding them.]
Gogoba Chief: Oh good. Rescuers have arrived. AFTER our homes were engulfed in lava. But hey. Maybe you can save us, not that we'll have anywhere to live after.
Sticks: Can't we just leave them?
Sonic: [Off-screen] Don't worry, gang! I got this!
[Sonic arrives in his hover mode-engaged Blue Force One and flies over the lava. One of the Gogobas takes Sonic's hand. Sonic pulls the Gogoba up on the Blue Force One to take him to safety. Meanwhile, Morpho fires a laser from a handheld device that knocks a tree down. The tree falls next to the Gogobas' rock, creating a bridge over the lava for the Gogobas. They all quickly run across it, the log sinking into the lava as they do so. Eventually, they all make It across.]
Gogoba Chief: Ow! I think I twisted my ankle running across that shoddy bridge you made, but hey. Don't worry about it.
Sonic: What'd I tell you guys? Great job, Steve! [Gives a thumbs up.]
Morpho: All in a day's work! Steve, away!
[Morpho runs around in circles. Team Sonic look confused.]

[Scene Change: Village Center, day.]

[Sonic, Knuckles and Morpho (disguised as Sticks without anyone knowing it) walk through the Village Center.]
Fennec Shopkeeper: Oh look. It's the guy who broke into my shop and devoured all of my vegetables.
[The Fennec Shopkeeper shows Sonic, Knuckles and Sticks an empty shop with a few turnips left.]
Fennec Shopkeeper: What, did you realize you missed a turnip?
Knuckles: Who me?! That's crazy talk! I don't even eat vegetables.
Glue Merchant: That's the guy who stole half the merchandise at my glue store!
Knuckles: That's ridiculous! I don't even eat glue!
Morpho: There are too many allegations around Knuckles for my taste. Where there's smoke there's fire! We gotta cut him loose.
Sonic: No way! Knuckles wouldn't have done those things. What are you saying, Sticks?
Knuckles: No Sonic. She's right. When there's smoke, there's fire. And where there's fire, there's [Thinking] camping! I can pitch a tent outside town until this all blows over.
[Knuckles miserably walks away. Sonic wants to come with Knuckles, but Morpho holds him back and shakes his head. As Knuckles and Sonic part ways, Morpho morphs from Sticks into himself.]
Morpho: Hahaha.

[Scene Change: Outside Sonic's Shack, day.]

Morpho: So, Knuckles turned out to be a thief? Hey, you think you know a guy...
Sticks: What the heck's going on? A little birdie told me Knuckles ran in to exile.
Soar the Eagle: [Angrily] I have a name, you know, and I'm not "little"!
Sonic: Sticks, you were the one who said we should cut Knuckles loose. Remember? "Where there's smoke, there's fire"?
Sticks: That's not true! There can be many reasons for smoke: Chemical reactions, smoke bonds, liquid smoke, in some cases, even steam can be confused for smoke.
[Morpho tiptoes behind a rock and morphs into Tails without anyone noticing.]
Morpho: I can't believe you, Sticks! First you force our buddy out of town, and now you're screaming about smoke bombs?! Glad I submitted you to that government watch list.
Sticks: [Gasps] I gotta go burn a bunch of documents. Ignore the smoke, there's no fire. [Runs off]
Amy: Tails, why would you say that? That's not like you.
Morpho: Oh, I don't know, Amy. I guess I've just been kind of on edge lately. I could really use someone to talk to, about my feelings.

[Scene Change: Seaside Island, jungle, day.]

[Amy and Morpho are walking through the jungle.]
Amy: Dr. Amy is in session! So, what do you want to talk about first? Your childhood inadequacies, or your regular inadequacies?
[Morpho pulls a rope that releases a bucket of glue on Amy's head. Amy falls on her back, unable to move.]
Amy: Hey! What's the big idea?!
[Morpho morphs back to normal.]
Morpho: Nothing personal. I just wanna destroy you and all your furry friends! I guess that is personal, but I can't have you blow my cover. Here, have a turnip.
[Morpho throws Amy a turnip and morphs into Amy.]

[Scene Change: Outside Sonic's Shack, day.]

[Sonic is sitting alone on the porch. Morpho confronts him in his Amy disguise.]
Morpho: I just talked to Tails. I don't want to breach doctor-patient confidentiality, but he thinks you're running this team into the ground, and I agree.
Sonic: I know that I sometimes jump in and do things by myself but, we're a team. We're friends.
Morpho: [Upset] Are we?
[Morpho miserably walks off. Sonic groans. Hiding behind a rock, Morpho grins and morphs into Sonic.]

[Scene Change: Tails' Workshop, day.]

[Tails is busy working until Morpho comes in in his Sonic disguise.]
Morpho: [Sighs] Tails. Things have gotten pretty crazy lately. It's probably best if we all take a break from working together.
Tails: No way! I'm never gonna stop [Clenches his fist] fighting by your side.
Morpho: My mind's made up.
Tails: [Sighs] You're doing that thing again, when you think you can just make decisions for all of us. Maybe you're right. [Angrily] Maybe we do need a break from each other!
[Tails runs out of his workshop. Morpho laughs to himself and morphs into Tails when he hears a knock on the shudders. He opens the shutters and the real Sonic turns up.]
Sonic: Tails, listen. I'm sorry I've been kind of a jerk lately. I just wanted to make sure you still have my back. I really need my best friend right now.
Morpho: [Angrily] You brought this on yourself, Sonic!
[Morpho rudely slams the shutters behind him and laughs evilly to himself.]

[Scene Change: Eggman's Lair, day.]

[Morpho knocks on the lair door. Eggman opens it.]
Dr. Eggman: You again.
Morpho: Look. I owe you a "My bad". I'm not your brother.
Dr. Eggman: I knew it!
Morpho: I'm Morpho. A shapeshifting robot from another dimension.
Dr. Eggman: I didn't know it.
[Morpho morphs into Sonic, Dave the Intern and a moose before morphing back into himself.]
Morpho: Wha-hah!
Dr. Eggman: So why are you here?
Morpho: My creator accidentally blew up our dimension.
Dr. Eggman: He sounds like a dunce.
Morpho: I was created by Dr. Eggman.
Dr. Eggman: Well, lovable dunce. So, you're not my brother.
Morpho: Nope. Negatory. Nuh-uh. Nah. I'm in no way, shape or form your or anyone else's brother. Not in this or any dimension. I am so totally not your brother.
Dr. Eggman: It might have been fun and interesting to have a brother, but I guess a shape-shifting robot is almost as good. Come on in!
[Eggman walks with Morpho inside the lair.]
Morpho: I decided to prove my worth to you by infiltrating Team Sonic. I gained their trust and then slowly drove them apart.
Dr. Eggman: An actual brother couldn't have come up with a better plan.
Morpho: Now, Sonic's all alone, weakened by self-doubt.
[Both Eggman and Morpho laugh among themselves.]

[Scene Change: Village Center, day]

[Eggman and Morpho set off on the Eggmobile to Hedgehog Village. Badniks and Burnbot infiltrate the village and scare the villagers. Two Beetle Bots fire electrical beams at Lady Walrus and Lady Goat. Lady Walrus tries to run away but she turns back after three Mantis Bots chase her. As soon as the Eggmobile arrives at the site, Sonic arrives too.]
Sonic: What's going on, Eggman-- and Steve? [Drops a miserable face] Oh man, not you too.
Morpho: It's over, Sonic. You fell right into my trap! [Laughs]
Dr. Eggman: [Laughs] And thanks to Morpho, my shape-shifting robot who incidentally isn't my brother, none of your lame friends are here to assist you. Oho! This is delicious!
[Sonic tries to spin attack the Eggmobile but a Mantis Bot gets in his way. He is grabbed by Burnbot's arm and is pounded to the ground. Sonic tries Homing Attacking two Beetle Bots, but they dodge him. Sonic is then surrounded by a group of Beetle Bots and Mantis Bots.]
Sonic: Uh...
Tails: [Off-screen] Don't worry, Sonic.
[The camera points to the rest of Team Sonic.]
Tails: We've got your back!
[The rest of Team Sonic prepare for combat. Knuckles punches some Beetle Bots out of the way. Tails beheads a Mantis Bot with his wrench.]
Tails: I knew you would never give up on the team, no matter how bad things got. So I decided to get to the bottom of this!
[Amy hammers another Mantis Bot.]
Amy: That's when Tails used his tracking device in my [Hammers a robot] Communicator to find me! I told him [Hammers a robot] all about this bogus Eggman's [Hammers twice] evil morphing scheme!
Knuckles: [Punching Burnbot] The next thing you know, the team's all back together.
[Knuckles kicks Burnbot, knocking it over, and punches a Mantis Bot. With the robots defeated, Team Sonic stare at Eggman. Sonic spin attacks the Eggmobile, sending Eggman and Morpho flying into the distance.]

[Scene Change: Seaside Island, jungle, day.]

[Both Eggman and Morpho fall to the ground in the jungle. The Eggmobile is destroyed.]
Morpho: Guess my plan wasn't as good as I thought...
Dr. Eggman: Are you kidding? I know that you're just a shape-shifting robot and not my actual brother, but with a plan as needlessly complicated and convoluted as that one, I kind of wish you were my brother.
Morpho: Even though you're not my brother, that means a lot.
Dr. Eggman: Well that thing's junk. How are we gonna get out of here?
[Morpho morphs into a pogo stick. Eggman jumps on it and pogoes away with joy as the screen fades to black.]