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Sonic Boom
Eggman's Anti Gravity Ray (transcript)

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This is the transcript from the Sonic Boom episode, "Eggman's Anti Gravity Ray".

[Scene: Eggman's Lair, morning.]

[Eggman is walking through the corridor in his dressing gown with a mug of tea.]
Dr. Eggman: Nothing like a lazy Sunday morning. Got a cup of tea, a stack of Yacht rock albums on vinyl, and a brand new loofah just waiting to be made unreturnable. Now all I need is my morning paper.
[Eggman exits his lair. He bends down and tries to pick up the newspaper, but it gets blown away by a gust of wind. With some of the pages blowing into the corridor, Eggman runs around and catches the pages.]
Dr. Eggman: Every Sunday, that lousy draught ruins my morning routine. Mother nature's gotten real smug ever since my factories gave her the power to rain acid. It's time I take her down a peg.

[Scene: Eggman's Lair, morning.]

[Eggman is writing calculations on a chalkboard.]
Dr. Eggman: Once I rotate my layer sixteen degrees, I will have beaten Mother Nature at her own game.
[Orbot and Cubot enter the lair with a breakfast tray.]
Orbot: Breakfast is served. We worked all morning on this bountiful feast, but it was a labor of love.
[Eggman acccidentally knocks the tray out of Cubot's hands. The robots gasp in horror.]
Dr. Eggman: Oh, look what you did! Clean that mess up while I go get my Gravity Boots, and don't touch anything!
[Eggman stomps out of the room.]

[Scene Change: Seaside Island, beach, day.]

[Team Sonic are playing soccer on an open pitch. Sonic dribbles past Tails and Amy. With the ball on the ground, he runs to take a shot.]
Sonic: All right. Whoa!
[Sonic falls through the ground. Knuckles digs out of the ground and heads the ball. He then looks at Sonic.]
Knuckles: Er... Whoops.
Sonic: Knuckles. [Jumps out of the hole rubbing the sand off his chest] How many times do we have to tell you not to dig tunnels everywhere?
Knuckles: [Groans] But digging's what I dig. You dig?
Sonic: Well, not anymore it's not.
[Knuckles grumpily stands up and kicks the ball, hitting Tails on the head and landing the ball in the opposing goal.]
Knuckles: [Low voice] Touchdown.

[Scene Change: Eggman's Lair, day.]

[Cubot and Orbot return with a mop and bucket respectively to clear up the mess.]
Cubot: You know. Sometimes I think Eggman doesn't appreciate us.
Orbot: What makes you say that?
Cubot: The way he kicks us when we're down, calls us names, and always says, "I don't appreciate you".
[Cubot knocks over the pillar with the Anti Gravity Ray on top with his mop. The ray activates and floats upward, picking up the mess with its anti gravity field.]
Orbot: Now I see why Dr. Eggman wanted his Gravity Boots.
Cubot: Because Fashion Week's just around the corner?
Orbot: No! To counteract the effects of this Anti Gravity Ray!
[Orbot grabs the Anti Gravity Ray by the handle and moves the mess it has collected towards the bin. Orbot then deactivates the Anti Gravity Ray, dropping the items in the bin.]
Orbot: This new invention could revolutionize the world as we know it!
Cubot: [Puts the Anti Gravity Ray on his head] And it makes a sweet hat too.
Orbot: [Aggressively] Give me that!
[Orbot tries to snatch the ray. Cubot refuses. Orbot pulls the control knob off, with the Anti Gravity Ray now stuck on Cubot's head. Cubot collides into the chalkboard which activates the ray, pulling himself and the Anti Gravity Ray's pillar upwards.]
Cubot: I think I'm finally getting my growth spurt! [Malfunctions]
Orbot: Hang on, Cubot! I'll get you down.
[Orbot tries to rescue Cubot but gets caught in the anti gravity field. Eggman arrives.]
Dr. Eggman: Just wait till they see me sporting these babies during Fashion Week.
[Without looking, Eggman walks into the anti gravity field.]
Dr. Eggman: [Angrily] I told you half-wits not to touch anything!
[Cubot malfunctions]
Orbot: The extra gravitational force is scrambling his processors!
[Eggman presses his wrist controller.]
Dr. Eggman: Minions, get me that gravity ray!
[Eggman's robots come over to help but they all get caught in the anti gravity field.]
Dr. Eggman: Argh, for pete's sake.
[A Mantis Bot that floats around uncontrollably hits a switch and activates the lair's pneumatic tube system.]
Dr. Eggman: Not the pneumatic tube system!
[A tube emerges out from the ceiling, sucking in Eggman, Orbot, Cubot and a few other Badniks before being blocked by a giant Ball Bot]

[Scene Change: Outside Eggman's Lair, day.] [Floating outside the lair, Eggman grunts angrily. He spots both of his Gravity Boots, catches them and puts them on his feet. He presses his wrist controller again and falls, landing with both feet on his lair.]

Dr. Eggman: And he sticks the landing!
[Afterwards, an umbrella and two sunbeds get caught in the anti gravity field. Cubot is then blown away by the wind, taking everything caught in the anti gravity field with him.]
Dr. Eggman: Oho no. That wind's not gonna get the best of me again.
[Eggman jumps into his Eggmobile and leaves.]

[Scene Change: Seaside Island, beach, day.]

[Team Sonic are still out playing soccer, with Amy holding the ball.]
Amy: It all comes down to this one penalty kick. [Drops the ball and places her foot on it.] Can a young woman break the glass ceiling and prove one and for all that a female can be just as good an athlete as a male?!
Knuckles: You know Amy. Anytime someone calls attention to the breaking of gender roles, it ultimately undermines the concept of gender equality by implying that this is an exception and not the status quo.
[The rest of Team Sonic have their eyes wide open in shock, staring at Knuckles in stunned silence, who shrugs.]
Knuckles: What? Just because I'm a meathead doesn't mean I'm not a feminist.
Sticks: While I loathe to call a halt to this very important dialogue, I'd be remiss if I didn't point out [Points up to the sky shrieking] the aliens are abducting our towels!
[Towels are being swallowed by the anti gravity field eminating from Cubot, who floats over the beach.]
Sonic: I don't think it's aliens we gotta worry about.
[Eggman flies over the beach in his Eggmobile, chasing Cubot. Team Sonic all set off and follow Eggman.]

[Scene Change: Hedgehog Village, day.]

[Cubot floats over Hedgehog Village, sucking up Fastidious Beaver, Wolf Sidekick and Leroy the Turtle.]
Cubot: [Malfunctioning] Anyone else smell burnt toast?
Dr. Eggman: Orbot. You've got the knob. Do something or I'll dock you a year's pay!
Fastidious: Actaully, he can't dock your wages because he doesn't pay you!
Wolf Sidekick: He could probably dock them for room and board.
Leroy: Not if he's claimimg them as dependents on his taxes.
Orbot: Could we perhaps discuss my financial matters at another juncture?
Dr. Eggman: I guess if I want to fix this, I gotta pull myself up on my gravity bootstraps and do it myself.
[Eggman makes his way to Cubot.]
Cubot: Hello, sir. Would you care for a car wash while you dine?
[Orbot tries to pass the control switch over to Eggman, but fails to do so, as the Eggmobile gets caught in the anti gravity field.]
Dr. Eggman: Argh! Abandon ship!
[Eggman falls off the Eggmobile and lands on the ground on his boots.]
Dr. Eggman: You can handle this, Eggman. Just got to uh... inventor thingy. Yeah, I'll do that!
[Eggman runs off. In the meantime, the anti gravity field sucks up Comedy Chimp, Wolfie and a bicycle.]
Wolfie: I'm flying!
Amy: Looks like we've got to rescue more than just our beach towels.
[A cannon gets caught in the anti gravity field. Team Sonic avoid the cannon.]
Sonic: Oh great. Now he's affecting cannon. This has gone too far! [Looking at Tails] Tails, you got anything that could launch me into the air?
[Tails sets up a catapult with Sonic sitting on it. Eggman comes walking back.]
Dr. Eggman: Just got to connect this hyper tube to that oscillator. [Notices Team Sonic and the catapult] Oh, Sonic's here. He'll save the day or something. [Chucks the items away and whistles as he leaves.]
[Tails activates the catapult, launching Sonic up in the air. Sonic, holding a rope, ties the trapped villagers together with it.]
Comedy Chimp: And I told myself, I'd never get tied down again! Hah!
Wolf Sidekick: Hoho! You still got it, C.C.!
[Sonic lands and tugs the rope down. The rest of Team Sonic help him. The villagers are being pulled down.]
Amy: It's working!
[Cubot has a system shock and screams. His eyes begin to glow yellow and he fires gravity blasts in random directions.]
Sticks: That can't be good.
Cubot: [Church voice] It's all so clear now, as if I'm seeing the world from a new perspective...
Amy: Gee. Imagine that.
Cubot: We should all float freely.
[Cubot fires gravity blasts at the roped villagers, releasing the ropes binding them and pulling them back upward.]
Cubot: Join me. I'll free you from gravity's tyranny and we'll all ascend into the stars!

[Scene Change: Meh Burger, day.]

Dr. Eggman: One order of french fries, please.
Dave the Intern: Do you want fries with that?
Dr. Eggman: Hmm... good question.
[Eggman reads the leaflet, while Dave is hit by an gravity blast from Cubot and floats into the air.]
Dr. Eggman: You know what? I do want fries with my fries.
[Eggman puts the leaflet down and notices Dave is not behind the counter, but is instead being carried up in the sky.]
Dr. Eggman: That anti grav thing is really turning into a pain in the butt. Guess it falls on Eggman to take care of business... And make my own fries!
[Eggman jumps over the counter.]

[Scene Change: Village Center, day.]

[The Walrus Male, Fennec Male and Sheep Villager get hit by Cubot's gravity blasts. Amy, Sonic and Sticks try to pull each one back down.]
Cubot: The path to true enlightenment is by breaking free of the invisible forces that hold you down.
[Cubot fires another blast at Amy, she dodges, letting go of the Walrus Male. Sticks also dodges, releasing the Fennec Male in the process.]
Knuckles: That Cubot guy is starting to make a lot of sense.
Tails: [Angrily] Yeah, until everybody floats so high they run out of oxygen and can't breathe.
Knuckles: Good point. Wish you said that before I went all in.
[Knuckles is revealed to have been shot by Cubot's gravity blast. Knuckles slowly floats into the sky. Tails tries to catch him and Knuckles tries to swim down, but they both fail, leaving Knuckles in the air.]

[Scene Change: Meh Burger, day.]

[Eggman tries a fry]
Dr. Eggman: Bleugh. These fries are either burnt or frozen. For somehow, both.

[Scene Change: Village Center, day.]

[Cubot fires more gravity blasts. Sticks pushes T.W. Barker, Beth the Shrew and the Rabbit Girl out of the way. However, as soon as she pushes the Reindeer Girl, she gets hit by one of Cubot's gravity blasts, causing her to float into the air. Amy gasps and tries to help Sticks but she gets hit by Cubot's gravity blast as well.]
Cubot: You're free now, free to express yourself.
Sonic: [Panicking in a low voice] Oh no, the last thing we want is Amy expressing herself. [Shrieking and grabbing Tails] We gotta do something!

[Scene Change: Tails' Workshop, day.]

[Inside Tails' Workshop, Sonic and Tails dress up in their spacesuits and set off on Tails' Plane.]

[Scene Change: Above Hedgehog Village, day.]

[With Tails' Plane arriving over Hedgehog Village, Tails tilts the plane around to dodge more of Cubot's gravity blasts.]
Cubot: Join my movement, Sonic. And together, we'll hand out annoying pamphlets to people at the airport.
[Cubot fires another gravity blast at Tails' Plane, but misses.]
Tails: We better do something. Oxygen's in short supply up here.
Orbot: Sonic, catch!
[Orbot throws the Anti Gravity Ray's control knob. Tails redirects his plane towards the knob and Sonic catches it.]
Sonic: Got it! Cubot, prepare to be grounded!
[Tails dodges more gravity blasts from Cubot. Sonic deploys an Enerbeam and uses it to hold onto the underside of Tails' Plane while avoiding more gravity blasts. As Tails' Plane flies over Cubot, Sonic jumps on top of the Anti Gravity ray, reattaches the knob and turns it.]
Sonic: And boom goes the dynamite!
[Sonic attaches his Enerbeam to Tails' Plane, allowing to him hitch a ride on it. The Anti-Gravity Ray pulls Cubot down. Cubot's eyes return to normal.]
Cubot: No! I can feel gravity's sticky hands all over me!
[All the trapped villagers celebrate while they slowly fall back down to the ground in the Village Center.]
Knuckles: Phuh. Glad that's over. I'll never be swayed by charismatic charlatans offering vague promises of a better future again.
Barker: Can I interest you in an exclusive timeshare opportunity?
Knuckles: Sign me up!
[Tails' Plane lands on the ground. Sonic and Tails jump off, taking their helmets off.]
Sonic: Great job up there, Tails.
Tails: I learned from the best: TV!
[Cubot floats down. Sonic and Tails throw their helmets into the plane and catch Cubot.]
Cubot: Oh, cruel fate. Sending me back to my mundane low-altitude existence. [Sobs]
[Knuckles, with help from Sonic, pulls the Anti Gravity Ray off Cubot's head. The Anti Gravity Ray is tossed and lands somewhere on the ground.]
Orbot: Cubot. Have your diagnostics returned to operational capacity?
Cubot: Uh, no. But I'm working just fine.
Orbot: He's back to normal!
[Everyone looks at Orbot except Sonic, who notices his feet are stuck to the ground. The rest of Team Sonic hear him grunting and look at him.]
Sonic: Something isn't right. Anyone else feel a little heavy?
Knuckles: Well, I did eat an entire extra-large pizza-lovers' pizza this afternoon. [To Sticks] That's the pizza with the little pizzas on top.
Sticks: I'm with Sonic. Something ain't kosher here.
[Everyone notices their feet are stuck to the ground.]
Tails: [To Sonic] I don't think you've switched off the Anti Gravity Ray. I think you put it in reverse!
[Everyone falls over with their bodies stuck to the ground.]

[Scene Change: Meh Burger, day.]

Dr. Eggman: Teeheehee! I've finally done it: the perfect batch of fries. Now, to taste.
[Eggman tries to eat the French fry, but with the Anti Gravity Ray in reverse, he falls to the ground on his back. He reaches out for the French fry in frustration.]
Dr. Eggman: Nooo!

[Scene Change: Village Center, day.]

[Everyone struggles to get up.]
Sonic: [Struggling] Knuckles. You're closest. You'll have to take out the gravity ray!
Knuckles: No problemo!
[Knuckles tries to get up onto his feet but fails.]
Knuckles: Actually, yes problemo!
Sonic: Remember what I said before about not digging tunnels?! Forget it!
Knuckles: Forget what?!
Amy: He wants you to dig!
Knuckles: I dig!
[Knuckles digs a tunnel underneath the Anti Gravity Ray, which falls into the tunnel next to Knuckles. Knuckles punches the Anti Gravity Ray, completely destroying it. With everyone able to stand up, they cheer. Sonic pats Knuckles on the back.]

[Scene Change: Eggman's Lair, day.]

[A group of Eggman robots, including Orbot and Cubot, try to push the lair while Eggman watches them and eats fries.]
Orbot: By my calculations, we've managed to rotate the lair an entire eighth of a degree.
Dr. Eggman: Great. Only 127 eighths more to go then you can come back inside!
[Orbot and Cubot groan and continue pushing the lair as the screen fades to black.]