Bro-Down Showdown (episode)/Transcript

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Sonic Boom Bro-Down Showdown (Transcript)

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This is a transcript from the Sonic Boom episode, "Bro-Down Showdown".

[Scene: Amy's House, day.]

[Amy is cleaning the handle on her hammer. When a knock on Amy's door is heard, she gets up and opens the door. Leroy the Turtle appears at Amy's door]

Leroy: Telegram; for Amy Rose. You won the "most selfless award".

[Amy swipes the transcript from Leroy's hands.]

Amy: Mine!

[Amy knocks Leroy on his back.]

[Scene Change: Amy's House, exterior, day.]

[Sonic and Knuckles appear.]

Sonic: Amy! What is it?

Amy: A few weeks ago I submitted myself for this year's most selfless award, and I just found out that I won!

Knuckles: Uh, you submitted yourself? Can you do that?

Amy: In this life, you gotta look out for number one!

[The camera pans to an overturned Leroy.]

Leroy: I deserve this...

[Scene Change: Amy's House, Interior, day.]

[Amy grabs her things to put into her bag.]

Sonic: So, umm, while you're gone, you're gonna need a house-sitter huh?

Amy: Last time I left you two here, I came back to find a family of skunks living in the crawlspace.

Knuckles: You should be flattered, skunks are veerryy picky.

Amy: [groans]

Sonic: Come on Amy, let us stay here! I need a change of scenery, and it gets boring watching a majestic sunset of an endless tranquil sea of blue outside my beachfront paradise every day.

Knuckles: And I want to watch cable!

[Amy glares, displeased.]

Sonic and Knuckles: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!

Sonic: Can we stay?

Knuckles: Be a guy!

Amy: [groans] UGH! Fine! But only because I am extremely selfless. BUT if you two do anything foolish I promise you will face MY WRATH! Ta-ta!

[Amy packs her bags and leaves through the front door, leaving Sonic and Knuckles alone. Sonic and Knuckles high five.]

Sonic and Knuckles: Yeah-ha!

Sonic: Wanna do somethin' foolish?

Knuckles: Did you even have to ask?

[Sonic stands on top of a stone with Knuckles holding it, ready to throw Sonic. Knuckles throws Sonic across the house. Sonic rides around the house like on a surf board, breaking some of Amy's possessions and vases. Sonic lands on the couch, and Knuckles runs up to him.]

Sonic: Stuck it!

Knuckles: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Sonic and Knuckles: Nacho Break!

[Sonic and Knuckles eat nachos while watching Amy's TV. Knuckles drops cheese onto Amy's couch, freaking both of them out.]

Sonic: It's okay! It's just a small stain! We can fix this!

[Sonic rubs the cheese stain on the couch with a cloth, making it worse and more noticeable.]

Knuckles: Uh, I heard seltzer can get out stains.

[Sonic speeds off and quickly returns.]

Sonic: No seltzer. But there's grape soda!

[Sonic pours the grape soda onto the stain on Amy's couch.]

Sonic: It has bubbles, so it should work!

[Camera pans onto a close up of Sonic and Knuckles's faces.]

Knuckles: You soaked it! Better take it outside to dry in the sun.

[Sonic and Knuckles attempt to carry the couch outside through the door, both grunting trying to pull the couch through]

Sonic: Woah, you're ripping it!

Knuckles: YOU'RE ripping it!

[Sonic and Knuckles both grunt with contempt. They look at each other briefly, then bring it back inside. They both hop back on the couch and sigh deeply.]

Knuckles: Amy's gonna kill us! What do we do?!

[Comedy Chimp appears on the TV.]

Comedy Chimp: Do you think you and your bro have what it takes to throw down on Bro-Down Showdown? The show where bros compete to show how well they know their bro. Bro-Down Showdown will be taping at the village center this weekend!

Knuckles: How's that gonna help us? Stupid TV.

Comedy Chimp: Don't miss your chance to win a brand new couch!

Knuckles: Still don't get it.

Comedy Chimp: Yes! You heard right! A brand new couch!

[Knuckles continues to look unimpressed.]

Knuckles: Nope. Nothing.

[The camera pans to Eggman's Fly Bot watching over Sonic and Knuckles.]

[Scene Change: Eggman's lair.]

[Eggman is in his office watching Fly Bot's camera feed of Sonic and Knuckles.]

Dr. Eggman: Do I need to express how that spying on Sonic has given me an idea for a plan to destroy him? Or is that obvious?

Cubot: Is what obvious?

[Scene Change: Village Center, day.]

[Sonic and Knuckles are in line to audition for Bro-Down Showdown.]

Sonic: Can't believe how many people showed up to this audition!

[Dr. Eggman appears, pushing other villagers out of the line.]

Dr. Eggman: Out-of-the-way! Move it or lose it! Total bros coming through!

Sonic: Eggman? What are you doing here?

Dr. Eggman: Nothing, just auditioning with my "bro-bot"! Ain't that right, Orbie?

Orbot: Yes, sir. It would seem I'm your, "bro".

Dixon: ALRIGHT! Who's next?

[Dixon starts to list out flaws in the would-be contestants.]

Dixon: Too old, too ugly, too out of touch with the common man.... [views Sonic and Knuckles, standing with smug looks] Ehh, next!

Sonic: Hey! You barely looked at us!

Dixon: Sorry kid, just not getting enough of a "bro vibe".

Dr. Eggman: [looks at Sonic] Ha ha! Stinks to be you!

Sonic: Can it, Egghead! You think he's gonna prefer your "unruly moustache", and your dainty lame-bot?

[Orbot sighs.]

Dr. Eggman: I'll show you unruly, you spiny haired rodent!

Dixon: I'll have none of that bickering at my audition! Save it... for the show! You two are "bros" now!

Sonic: What? No, we're not "bros", we're ENEMIES!

Dr. Eggman: That hedgehog is no bro of mine, and I'm not gonna complain if it gets us on the show. Come on Sonic! Play ball!

Sonic: [sighs] I guess you're right. [looks sincerely at Knuckles] Sorry Knux, but if we wanna win that couch for Amy, I gotta do this.

Knuckles: [looks sad] But, I thought this was gonna be a "Sonic and Knuckles" episode...

Dr. Eggman: Yeah, well life's full of disappointments, Nurples. I always wanted to be a traffic cop. [performs a left turn signal] Now move along! You're blocking the fire lane.

[Scene Change: Bro-Down Showdown stage, day.]

[The Bro-Down Showdown stage is shown, with the pairs of bros: Sonic and Dr. Eggman, Knuckles and Mike the Ox, the Stunt Bears, and Dave the Intern and Lady Walrus]

Knuckles: Look Sonic! I got a new partner. Jealous much?

Sonic: Great idea, Knux! Now we have double the chances of winning that couch for Amy!

Knuckles: Aww, way to take the wind out of my sails.

[The camera pans to a bird's eye view of the stage.]

Comedy Chimp: Live! From Village Center! It's Bro-Down Showdown! Today's "Bros", Sonic the Hedgehog and Dr. Eggman! Knuckles the Echidna and Mike the Ox! A pair of Stunt Bears! And Dave the Intern and Lady Walrus!

Sonic: Seriously, Dave? SHE'S your bro?

Dave: We don't like to put labels on our bro-lationship.

Comedy Chimp: Thank you! Welcome to Bro-Down Showdown! The show where "bros" go toe-to-toe in hopes of winning a narratively convenient prize!

[The audience gasps.]

Comedy Chimp: So let's get started! Dr. Eggman? What is Sonic's favorite movie?

[The camera switches to Knuckles whispering to Mike.]

Knuckles: No way he'll know this; It's Crocto-Pottomus.

Dr. Eggman: Hmmm.. I believe one time while he was pummeling me with a severed arm of one of my robot drones, he mumbled something about "Space Pigeons". So I'm gonna go with Space Pigeons 2, everyone knows it's the best of the trilogy.

[Sonic and Eggman's buzzer light goes green and a thumbs-up is shown.]

Comedy Chimp: Correct! Space Pigeons 2. Sonic and Eggman off to an early lead. Now Dave and Lady Walrus.

Sonic: I can't believe you knew that!

Dr. Eggman: Hey, you gotta know your enemy! Especially when he's your bro! [gives Sonic a noogie] Ow!

[A buzzer sounds.]

Comedy Chimp: That's right for 10 points! Now Stunt Bear No. 2, how did Stunt Bear No. 2 say you first met?

[Stunt Bear 1 growls at Stunt Bear 2. Their buzzer light goes red, indicating a wrong answer. They proceed to fight.]

Comedy Chimp: Ooh, that's a disqualification. The Bro code clearly dictates there must be no fighting between bros. Now Knuckles, we asked Mike the following question. "A bro would never do what, to another bro?"

Knuckles: Hmm, I'm gonna have to go with... Totally ditch him to appear on a game show with his arch-nemesis!

Sonic: [sighs]

[Knuckles and Mike's buzzer light goes red.]

Mike: I said a bro would never eat the last cheese ball without asking, but your answer was good too.

[There is a commercial break, with an advertising poster. The scene then returns to the game show stage.]

Comedy Chimp: Sonic, if your bro were a food, what kind of food would he be?

Sonic: Uh, I don't know, an egg?

Dr. Eggman: Ooh, I said herb-crusted tilapia, but then I changed my answer to egg!

[Their buzzer light goes green with a thumbs up.]

Comedy Chimp: Knuckles, we asked Mike what color you are.

Knuckles: Oh that's easy, I'm red!

Mike: Aww, I said green. I'm colorblind.

[Their buzzer light goes red.]

Mike: Was that the green light?

Comedy Chimp: Now, Lady Walrus? What is Dave the Intern's occupation?

Lady Walrus: He works in the fast food industry!

Dave: I said evil villain bent on destroying the world.

Comedy Chimp: Judges? We can accept that answer!

[Their buzzer light goes green. Dave and Lady Walrus fist bump.]

Comedy Chimp: Sonic, if you went out of town, what's the first thing your bro said he would do, while you were gone?

Sonic: Oh, I know this one! It's gotta be "destroy the village".

Dr. Eggman: He's right! I said I'd destroy the village! I'd reduce you all to a smoldering pile of ash.

[Their buzzer light goes green, and the audience applauds. Sonic and Eggman hug, but quickly break apart in embarrassment.]

Comedy Chimp: Well, that ends round one. Knuckles and Mike, you have the lowest score. Audience! What happens to them now?!

Audience: You're, bro-liminated!

[Knuckles and Mike leave the stage in despair.]

Comedy Chimp: We're down to the final two teams. Which one will go home with that snazzy new couch?

[The camera switches to the couch, then switches back to the contestants, with loud footsteps booming in the background. Eggman's Obliterator Bot appears, ready to attack, shooting lasers at the frantic audience. The camera switches back to Sonic]

Sonic: An Eggman robot! Let's turn this bag of bolts into a scrap heap!

Comedy Chimp: Hang on! Did you say that's an Eggman robot? Judges? Yep, if you fight that robot you're technically fighting with your bro.

Sonic: You gotta be kidding me!

Dr. Eggman: I knew my plan would work! If you fight my robot we'll be disqualified and you'll never win that couch for that whiny little girlfriend of yours!

Sonic: SHE'S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!

[Buzzer light flashes red.]

Dr. Eggman: On the other hand, you could just stand back and watch the town get blown to smithereens. Either way, you lose! On live TV!

[Knuckles appears.]

Knuckles: Don't worry, "bro". I got this. Maybe combat will fill the Sonic-shaped void you've left in my heart!

[All the villagers give affectionate "awws" to Knuckles. Knuckles runs up to fight Obliterator Bot.]

Comedy Chimp: The producers are telling me that I don't get paid if we don't finish the show. So let's move on to round two. Sonic! What does Dr. Eggman have in his pockets, right now?

[Camera switches to Knuckles fighting Obliterator Bot.]

Sonic: Phew! Ooh, his pockets! Right! I don't know, a uhh, hippopotamus riding on a skateboard?

[Dr Eggman sets off the hippopotamus on a skateboard, to get swiftly destroyed by Obliterator Bot. Their buzzer light sounds green.]

Comedy Chimp: Lady Walrus!-

[The camera switches back to Knuckles fighting Obliterator Bot, with Knuckles slamming on its head, but to no avail.]

Comedy Chimp: Now Dr. Eggman, fill in the blanks! Whenever Sonic does "blank", I "blank" myself.

Dr. Eggman: Hmmm...

[The camera switches back to Knuckles pounding on the head of Obliterator Bot.]

Knuckles: Huh?

[Knuckles gets sent flying back by Obliterator Bot's sound waves. He looks nearly defeated.]

Sonic: Knuckles?!

Comedy Chimp: Dr. Eggman, we need your answer!

Dr. Eggman: Gotta think about this one for a minute, CC.

[Sonic looks at Knuckles, who is about to get decimated by a charging laser.]

Sonic: So? Those cushions are poly-foam right? Aww, the heck with it. I'M COMIN' BRO!

[Sonic rescues Knuckles from the death laser, and then grabs a sheet of metal, then puts one leg on top of it.]

Sonic: You ready to do somethin' stupid, bro?

Knuckles: Did you even have to ask?

[Knuckles launches Sonic on top of the sheet of metal into the face of Obliterator-Bot. Sonic does a spin-dash, charging it straight into the face of Obliterator Bot, destroying it.]

Dr. Eggman: [screams]

Comedy Chimp: Well, that's a disqualification! Today's winners are Dave the Intern and Lady Walrus!

[Dave and Lady Walrus both get up to sit on the new couch, but drop a cheese-covered nacho on it almost instantaneously.]

Knuckles: So what are we gonna do about Amy's couch?

[Scene Change: Amy's House, day.]

[Amy is walking home.]

Sonic: Amy, Nooo!

[At that moment, a missile that Knuckles had launched away earlier hits her house, and destroys her couch. Leroy is overturned again.]

Sonic: Oh man, Amy! Eggman totally destroyed your couch!

Knuckles: And after we didn't spill nachos on it! Aw, that's a shame!

Sonic: Yah, real shame. Come on Knuckles, let's get out of here.

[Sonic and Knuckles leave, to Amy's displeasure.]

Amy: Oh...

Leroy: [Miserably] I hope someone's been feeding my cat.

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