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Blank-Headed Eagle
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This is the transcript for the Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog episode, "Blank-Headed Eagle".

[The episode begins at Dr. Robotnik's fortress, where Scratch and Grounder are watching their TV show, "Edgar Eagle".]

Scratch: Hang on! Edgar will save you!
Grounder: Go on, Ellie! Call for help!
Ellie: Oh, no! An avalanche!

[Ellie gasps as an avalanche of boulders roll down towards her. She turns around and gasps again as a large fire is now in front of her]

Ellie: And a forest fire! Oh, help! Save me!

[Edgar Eagle flies to Ellie's rescue in his Eagle-copter.]

Scratch and Grounder: Yay!
Edgar Eagle: What's that? This looks like a job for... Edgar Eagle, champion of the skies!
Scratch and Grounder: All right, Edgar!

[In the next scene of Edgar Eagle, Edgar is standing in front of Ellie and puts his right hand on her chest.]

Edgar: Relax, Ellie. It takes more than a few rocks to faze Edgar Eagle!

[The boulders roll towards Edgar, who destroys them with several punches and karate chops.]

Edgar: Ha! Kia! Ugh! Ahhh. There. Now, if you'd like to make a wish...

[Edgar turns around and blows out the fire.]

Ellie: Oh, Edgar! My hero!
Grounder: Awww! Did you see that? Smashed em' into pebbles!
Scratch: Yeah! Wouldn't it be great to be like him?

[Dr. Robotnik walks in.]

Dr. Robotnik: What's going on here?

[Scratch holds his left hand up to his head]

Scratch: Uh, oh... we were just, uh... waiting for the news, your nastiness!
Grounder: Yeah, that's right! We wanted to see if we did anything rotten today.
Robotnik: Silence!
Scratch and Grounder: Yes, your rottenness!
Robotnik: How many times to I have to tell you two dingbats to do something useful with your spare time, like, uh... kissing my feet?

[Robotnik holds up his left foot and points to it with his left index finger. Scratch and Grounder put clothespins on their noses, and kiss Robotnik's feet.]

Scratch and Grounder: Mwah mwah mwah mwah mwah mwah!
Robotnik: All right, dingbots, break time is over. We've got a hedgehog to hunt!

[Robotnik kicks Scratch and Grounder with his right foot.]

Scratch and Grounder: Ooof!
Scratch: He called me a dingbot, and you said he didn't love me!
Grounder: Okay. Why don't we have a race? Whover catches Sonic first is the one the master loves best!

[Grounder rolls up to the doorway.]

Grounder: Oh, and I'm the fastest! So if I were you, I'd quit now!
Scratch: Whoa-ho-ho! Anybody can be fast if they have tracks!
Edgar [heard offscreen]: Tired of being slow as a tortoise?

[Scratch turns his attention to the TV, which has a commercial featuring Edgar.]

Edgar: Why be a slowpoke when you can experience the thrill of faster-than-eagle flight?
Scratch: How? How? How? How? How? Tell me how! Tell me how!

[Edgar is now revealed to be sitting in his Eagle-copter.]

Edgar: For your easy-to-build Eagle-copter kit, just send one thousand mobiums to Edgar Eagle, Box 555 Mobium City Studios, and, if you hurry,

[Edgar reaches behind his back with his right hand and pulls out a scarf and helmet.]

Edgar: You'll receive an authentic Edgar Eagle scarf and helmet set, free!

[Scratch reaches for a chicken-shaped bank on the shelf.]

Scratch: Bwahaha! You've had it, hedgehog!

[Scratch picks up the bank with both hands and tosses it onto the floor, where it shatters, causing its coins to fly into the air. One 5¢ coin is used as a transition to the next scene, which takes place in Scratch's bedroom, where there is a bed made of hay and a picture of Dr. Robotnik near the window. Scratch is seen assembling his Eagle-copter and the blueprints for it can even be seen above his bed.]

Scratch: Hmmm. Now, I'm supposed to fit tab A-392 into slot Z-427.

[Scratch picks up two wires and plugs them in. The wires electrocute him.]

Scratch: Yeow-how-how-how-hoo!

[An explosion appears, leaving Scratch a charred grey.]

Scratch [wearily]: Oh. Or was that slot x-427?

[Scratch picks up the instruction manual with his left hand. He opens it with both hands and reads through it.]

Scratch: Now, "Attach the parabolic matrix to the dookie to the oscillator framess and turn two full turns clockwise.". No problem.

[Scratch turns the oscillator framess clockwise once with his left hand.]

Scratch: Oh-ho-ho. One more turn.

[Scratch turns the oscillator framess clockwise again. The pieces assemble themselves into a mechanical shark.]

Scratch: [yells]

[The mechanical shark tries to chomp Scratch, but misses, as Scratch runs out of the way just in time. The mechanical shark then chases Scratch around his bedroom, even causing him to run up the wall and onto the ceiling several times.]

Scratch: He-he-help! Whoa! Whoa!

[The mechanical shark explodes, and the explosion is used as a transition to the next scene, where it appears to be nighttime. However, the night sky is merely a background, which rolls up as the sun rises. Scratch is now holding a wrench in his right hand]

Scratch: "Easy-to-build"? Ha!

[Scratch's Eagle-copter is now complete. He has even added an egg-bomb cannon on its nose.]

Scratch: This thing better zap Sonic good!

[Scratch is now wearing his official Edgar Eagle scarf and helmet as he climbs into his Eagle-copter.]

Scratch: Now, all I have to do is start her up!

[Scratch turns on the Eagle-copter with his left hand and grabs the steering stick with both hands. The Eagle-copter flies towards the window, which Scratch is quick to notice.]

Scratch: Whoa-ho-ho!

[Scratch's Eagle-copter flies through the window, leaving an Eagle-copter shaped hole in it and a grey cloud of dust. Meanwhile, Sonic and Tails are walking past a cornfield.]

Sonic: Boy, oh, boy, what a day, huh, kid?
Tails: It's awful peaceful, Sonic.
Sonic: It's good for you, little guy. Makes you appreciate the simple things, like... like... fresh jalepeños on your chili dogs!
Tails: Now I get it! You think Farmer Peck will give us a chili-dog!
Sonic: Could be! He sure was hot to get us out here!
Tails: I wonder why he sounded so worried.
Sonic: He must be one of those jumpy types. What could go wrong out here? Cows mooing, birds singing, bees buzzing...

[Sonic holds his left hand up to his left ear, as he does indeed hear buzzing, which is coming from Scratch's Eagle-copter.]

Sonic: Buzzing real loud!

[Scratch and his Eagle-copter fly towards Sonic]

Scratch: Eat flaming egg-bombs, hedgehog! Bwahaha!

[Scratch aims his egg-bomb cannon at Sonic and fires six egg-bombs from it.]

Sonic: Oops!

[Sonic grabs Tails by his right arm with his left hand. He runs out of the way just in time, as three of the egg-bombs miss. Scratch turns his Eagle-copter around.]

Scratch: Come back here, you prickly pest!

[Scratch, having lost Sonic, looks down for him.]

Scratch: Where'd he go? Where'd he go?

[Sonic and Tails are now dressed as police officers. Tails has a siren on his head and is carrying Sonic by the seat of his pants as he flies up to Scratch.]

Sonic: All right, buddy, pull over!
Scratch: Aw, come on, officer! What'd I do wrong?
Sonic: Let's go, buddy, down!
Scratch: Aw, fudge!

[Scratch, Sonic, and Tails land. Sonic is now holding a notebook in his right hand and a pencil in his left, as he is now writing things down in it.]

Sonic: Operating an Eagle-copter without a seatbelt, operating an Eagle-copter without enough brains to run a little red wagon,
Scratch: Now, wait a minute, officer!

[Sonic runs up to Scratch and points to him with his right index finger.]

Sonic: No, you wait a minute! You robot chickens make me sick! Get a couple of pints of motor oil in you, and suddenly, you're tough guys! Okay, mister, you chill right there!
Scratch: Golly, officer. How long?

[Sonic starts running.]

Sonic: Till you get a clue, geek!

[Sonic runs away.]

Scratch: Oh, no! It's you! Okay, hedgehog, it's payback time!

[In the next scene, Scratch is flying his Eagle-copter again.]

Scratch: Bwahaha! I'll blow him to smithereens! I'll blast him to kingdom come! I'll..

[Sonic rises from the back hatch of the Eagle-copter, dressed like a stewardess, and holding a plate with a chili dog in his right hand.]

Sonic: Complimentary chili dog, sir?

[Scratch turns around and stares at Sonic in shock. Sonic picks up the chili dog with his left hand and shoves it into Scratch's mouth. Scratch grumbles unintelligibly, then breathes fire.]

Scratch: Yeow-how-how!

[Sonic is now holding a fire extinguisher in his right hand and its hose in his left. He sprays Scratch with fire extinguishing foam to put out the fire, covering him in it.]

Sonic: Sorry, sir. No smoking.
Scratch: Whoa-ho-ho! Whoa! Whoa-ho-ho!
Sonic: Beginning our approach to Mobius international, egg-bomb cannons in an upright position.

[Sonic pushes the Egg-bomb cannon up.]

Sonic: Happy landings!

[Sonic jumps off the Eagle-copter, losing his disguise in the process. The fire extinguishing foam clears]

Scratch: I'll get you, Sonic!

[Scratch pulls the egg-bomb cannon's fuse with his right hand, causing the egg-bomb cannon to hit and damage the propeller.]

Scratch: [screams]

[Scratch's Eagle-copter falls and crashes. Sonic and Tails witness this.]

Sonic: I think he's gonna need a new paint job. Let's glide, Clyde!

[Sonic grabs Tails by his right arm with his left hand and runs away. In the next scene, Scratch is revealed to be sitting in front of a barn, with stars spinning over his head. Henrietta, the daughter of Farmer Peck, drives her motorcycle up to him.]

Henrietta Peck: My goodness! What happened?
Scratch: Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! Something happened?
Henrietta: Who are you, sir?

[The stars around Scratch's head clear up.]

Scratch: Ah! Uh, it takes more than an unscheduled landing to stop Edgar Eagle!

[Meanwhile, at Farmer Peck's house, Farmer Peck and his wife are sitting in their rocking chairs, rocking back and forth in them.]

Farmer Peck: Oh, I just hope Sonic gets here! I'm starting to wish I said "yes" to that Robotnik feller.

[Sonic runs up to Farmer Peck.]

Sonic: Sorry we're late, Farmer Peck.
Farmer Peck: You ought to slow down, son!
Sonic: Gotta hop hop! That's what makes me Sonic! Now, how can we help?

[In the next scene, Farmer Peck is showing Sonic and Tails around his farm.]

Farmer Peck: So, then this Robotnik feller offers me two mobiums for my whole farm!
Sonic: Good thing you didn't take em'. They were probably counterfiet!
Farmer Peck: Uh, he said, he was gonna build the biggest robot factory on Mobius, right in the middle of my farm!

[Sure enough, many large machines are seen bulldozing Farmer Peck's farm.]

Farmer Peck: What about it, Sonic? Can you help me?
Sonic: Do blue hedgehogs have red sneakers?

[Sonic runs up to the machines. Unknown to him, Robotnik and Grounder are watching him on television.]

Robotnik: Aha! At last, I've got him! The spiny little sap! Does he think he could sneeze at a genius of my caliber?
Grounder: Yeah. He could spread germs!
Robotnik: Moron! Get me the device!

[Grounder, who now has a hand where his left drill would be, hands Robotnik a remote control.]

Robotnik: Aha! It almost hurts being so brilliant!

[Robotnik snatches the remote from Grounder with his right hand.]

Robotnik: Do you know what this is, chips-for-brains?
Grounder: Um...

[Grounder's right eye turns into a + sign and his left turns into an = sign.]

Robotnik: At last, villains will be able to protect their heinous gizmos from busybodies like Sonic!
Grounder: I get it! You change the channels!
Robotnik: Numbskull! It's the remote for the Robotnik Diabolical Machine Alarm! Observe!

[Robotnik presses a button on the remote. Meanwhile, Sonic jumps on top of one of Robotnik's machines. He is near the hatch of the machine.]

Sonic: Hmmm. Be fun to thrash em' with a good ol' triple spin! Nah! Better put em' in reverse so they'll clean up this mess.

[Sonic pulls on the hatch, with no success of opening it.]

Robotnik Diabolical Machine Alarm: Attention! These vehicles are off-limits to unauthorized hedgehogs! Tresspassers will be subjected to mindless violence!
Sonic: Take a hike, lardnik!
[Sonic continues pulling on the hatch as several weapons systems rise from the machine and aim at him]
Sonic: On second thought...

[Sonic runs away from the machine, with three missiles following him. He sits in front of a rock as the missiles land near him and explode, creating a cloud of dust. When the dust clears, Sonic is unharmed, but the land around him isn't, as a gap has formed around Sonic.]

Sonic: Hmmm. This calls for Plan B.

[Sonic runs back up to the machine.]

Sonic: There. All you need is a little strategy.

[Sonic walks slowly up, unknowingly stepping on a land mine with his left foot.]

Robotnik Land Mine: Mine field activated!

[Sonic looks down at the land mine, which even says, LAND MINE in black letters. The land mine explodes and launches Sonic into the air. Farmer Peck, Mrs. Peck, and Tails all witness this from Farmer Peck's house.]

Farmer Peck: I hope Sonic's all right.

[Sonic lands near Farmer Peck, and his left sneaker is revealed to have come untied.]

Sonic: Ugh! That Robotnik's a menace! My sneaker came untied!

[Henrietta drives her motorcycle, now with Scratch in the passenger seat, up to her parents, Sonic, and Tails.]

Henrietta: Look who I found down by the barn!
Farmer Peck: Oh, I'll bite, Henrietta. Who?
Henrietta: Now, Papa, you know who he is. He's a big star!

[Sonic and Tails look at each other in question.]

Sonic and Tails: A star?
Henrietta: Yes. Edgar Eagle. Can't you see his official helmet and scarf? He told me all about himself. What a hero!
Tails: Gee, Sonic, what's with Scratch?
Sonic: Offhand, I'd say he's totally tweaked.

[An explosion can be heard in the background.]

Sonic: Uh-oh. Robotnik's machines!

[Sure enough, Robotnik's machines can be seen building the new robot factory. Henrietta starts to cry upon seeing this.]

Henrietta: Oh, Papa, where will we go?

[Scratch can now be seen in the driver's seat of Henrietta's motorcycle.]

Scratch: Don't worry, Ellie. This is a job for... Edgar Eagle!

[Scratch drives Henrietta's motorcycle towards Robotnik's machines.]

Sonic: Oh, no! He'll get us blown to smithereens!

[Scratch continues driving towards Robotnik's machines, with a determined sneer on his face.]

Sonic: I've gotta stop that misguided chicken, before he blows us all up!

[Sonic runs up to Scratch, who has now parked Henrietta's motorcycle behind one of Robotnik's machines.]

Scratch: It takes more than a few toy trucks to faze Edgar Eagle!

[Unknown to Scratch, Robotnik and Grounder are watching him on a monitor in Robotnik's fortress.]

Scratch: Now, get those machines out of here before I lose my temper!

[Robotnik pulls on his mustache with both hands.]

Robotnik: That dim-bot! I'm going to reprogram him as an umbrella stand!
Grounder: Looks like big brother finally popped a transitstor.

[Sonic has now caught up to Scratch, and is waving at him from behind.]

Sonic: Hey, Scratch!
Robotnik: Or... looks like Scratch finally did something useful!
Sonic: Come back here, you silly cluck! Those machines will fry you!
Scratch: Are you addressing me, sir?
Sonic: Stop fooling around, will you? Those things are dangerous!
Scratch: Ha!

[Scratch jumps off Henrietta's motorcycle.]

Scratch: "Danger" is Edgar Eagle's middle name!

[Scratch walks up to the machine. Sonic gasps and follows him.]

Grounder: Scratch did something useful?
Robotnik: Use your lenses, pin-head! He lured Sonic right into a trap!
[Robotnik runs up to his machines and starts pressing various buttons.]
Robotnik: Now I'm going to set the machine's weapons systems to maximum power! [laughs evilly] This is the kind of thing that makes being a rotten villain... worthwhile!
Scratch: Very well. I'll have to turn off these machines myself!
Robotnik: Sayonara, Sonic!
[Grounder rolls up to Robotnik and taps his butt with his left drill four times.]
Grounder: But, but, your grossness, you'll blow up Scratch, too!
Robotnik: Pity.

[Robotnik grabs a lever above a sign that says, DON'T PULL with both hands. Robotnik's machine fires at Sonic, who runs out of the way just in time, with Scratch in tow.]

Scratch: Whoa-ho-ho! Whoa-ho! Ah! Ow! Ooh! Oh-ho-ho-ho!

[Sonic takes Scratch back to Farmer Peck, Mrs. Peck, Henrietta, and Tails, who all have their right hands cupped to their ears.]

Henrietta: Oh! Oh oh oh, Edgar, darling!

[Henrietta runs up to Scratch and hugs him by his neck.]

Henrietta: Are you all right, Edgar?
Tails: Gee, Sonic. He thinks he's that Eagle guy on TV.
Scratch: I'm afraid Edgar Eagle isn't what he used to be. I should have rescued you!
Sonic: No problemo, Edgar, but let me ask you something. What do you remember about a guy called Dr. Robotnik?
Scratch: Uh, somehow the name sounds familiar. Uh, Robotnik... uh, Robotnik... uh...
Tails: Yeah! He's a fat no-goodnik!
Scratch: Wait a minute! Fat? Yes, uh... and ugly?

[Scratch stands up, knocking Henrietta off his back.]

Sonic: Whoa, little bro! I got a bumpin' idea! Come on!

[Sonic runs away, with Tails following him. Meanwhile, at Robotnik's fortress, Grounder is on Robotnik's back, attempting to dress him in a corset. He grunts heavily as he pulls on it.]

Robotnik: Tighter! Pull that corset tighter, you klutz-bot! I have to look my best for the opening of my new robot factory!

[The corset snaps, causing Grounder to fall off Robotnik's back.]

Grounder: [yells] Oh!
Robotnik: Oh, no.

[Three buttons on the corset fly off.]

Robotnik: [yelps] Oooh! Oh!

[Robotnik plugs his ears with his thumbs as the fourth button flies off the corset.]

Robotnik: [screams]

[The button flies into the machine, causing it to malfunction. Back at Farmer Peck's house, Scratch is telling Sonic, Tails, Henrietta, and Mrs. Peck more about Robotnik.]

Scratch: That's right! And this Robotnik guy has a big fortress near here! And, uh... and...
Sonic: Don't stop now!

[A thought balloon appears on the right side of the screen. In the thought balloon, Robotnik is lifting a mat that says, UN-WELCOME with his left hand and buring a key under there with his right.]

Scratch: And, he keeps the key under the Un-welcome mat!

[The thought balloon disappears.]

Scratch: Now how did I remember that?

[Farmer Peck runs worriedly up to Scratch, Sonic, Tails, Henrietta, and Mrs. Peck.]

Farmer Peck: The machines are going crazy! If we don't stop them in a hurry, we're done for!
Henrietta: Eeee!

[Henrietta faints, and Scratch catches her in his arms.]

Sonic: There has to be some kind of gadget in Robotnik's lab that turns him off and on!
Scratch: Yes, there is! I, I remember, uh, a... remote control!
Sonic: All right! I knew he was gonna come in handy! Listen, uh, Edgar, How would you like to take us to Robotnik's fortress, and help us find this gadget?
Scratch: To save Ellie and her folks from disaster? I'm your eagle!
Henrietta: I'm coming, too, you wonderful bird! And don't say no!
Scratch: Bu... bu... but Ellie...
Sonic Someone ought to stay here and look after your folks, Henrietta!
Henrietta: I'm sure Tails wouldn't mind. Would you?
Tails: Are you serious? Of course I'd mind!

[In the next scene, Scratch, Henrietta, and Sonic are seen climbing the hill to Robotnik's fortress.]

Scratch: I sure wish I could remember how I know so much about this crook, Robotnik.
Sonic: Oh, it'll come back to you. Not too soon, I hope.

[Scratch stops and points to Robotnik's fortress with his left index finger.]

Scratch: There it is!

[Henrietta bumps into Scratch, and Sonic bumps into Henrietta.]

Henrietta: Oof!
Sonic: Ugh!
Henrietta: Hmmm! It certainly could use some nice curtains!
Scratch: Shhh! From here on in, we'd better tiptoe.

[Scratch, Henrietta, and Sonic tiptoe up to Robotnik's fortress. Unknown to them, Robotnik is watching them on a monitor.]

Robotnik: Sonic again? And that circuit-bone Scratch? This time I'm really going to nuke those pests!

[Robotnik walks up to the phone and picks up the receiver with his right hand. Outside, Grounder is guarding Robotnik's fortress as the phone inside him rings. Grounder turns his drills into hands, then opens his chest compartment with his right hand and picks up the phone receiver with his left. He holds it up to his head and Robotnik can be heard growling unintelligibly]

Grounder: Ha ha ha! Of course, your putridness! They'll never know what hit em'!

[Grounder puts his phone back in his chest compartment and peeks out from behind the mountain.]

Grounder: Ha ha ha ha ha!

[Grounder hides back behind the mountain. As Scratch tiptoes past it, Grounder extends his right hand and grabs a mountain, then pulls it away, revealing a chili dog vending machine inside it, which Henrietta now notices.]

Henrietta: Oooh! Look!

[Henrietta runs up to the machine and holds out her hands.]

Henrietta: Edgar, darling, have you got five mobiums?

[Scratch walks up to Henrietta and reaches into his right pocket with his right hand.]

Scratch: There's something wrong here.

[Sonic walks up to Scratch and Henrietta as the former pulls out three coins and hands them to the latter.]

Sonic: Yeah. Five mobiums is way high for a chili dog!
Scratch: It's not that.

[Henrietta places one coin in the vending machine with her right hand. This activates a mechanism in the vending machine.]

Scratch: That's it!
Sonic: What?
Scratch: It's one of Robotnik's traps!

[The vending machine is revealed to be on a platform, which has a rocket underneath, pushing it up. Grounder rolls up to the empty space where the rocket was.]

Grounder: Ha ha! So long, suckers!
Sonic: Glad you remembered.

[The platform is now shown to be exiting Mobius' orbit.]

Henrietta: Help!
Sonic: Hang on tight! We're going to be landing at Sonic speed, and it's a good thing I'm used to it!

[Scratch and Henrietta grab Sonic's hands, and Sonic speeds off the platform with them in tow.]

Scratch: Whoa-ho-ho-ho!

[Sonic's speed causes the platform to tilt. It tilts sideways, flying back to Mobius. Meanwhile, Grounder is rolling up the hill to Robotnik's fortress.]

Grounder: Heh heh. No question about it, the master's gonna love me best!

[A shadow casts over Grounder and a whistling sound can be heard.]

Grounder: Gee, an eclipse?

[Grounder looks up and sees the platform is about to fly into him. He tries to roll away.]

Grounder: Yaaah!

[The platform flies into Grounder and explodes. The phone inside Grounder rings as Grounder pushes the rubble off him. He is now flattened.]

Grounder: Oh no! Oh no!

[Grounder's right hand opens his chest compartment, pulls out the phone, and holds it up to his head. On the phone, Robotnik can be heard growling unintelligibly.]

Grounder: Yes, your beastliness?

[Robotnik growls unintelligibly again.]

Grounder: Of course I'm all right. I am just feeling a little low.

[In his fortress, Robotnik is looking at the monitor and holding the phone in his right hand.]

Robotnik: Well, get up here fast! I just saw that hedgehog on the fifth screen!

[Robotnik hangs up the phone and uses his right index finger to press the buttons on the monitor, which show various views outside his fortress. Outside Robotnik's fortress, Sonic, Scratch, and Henrietta see Robotnik from behind a rock.]

Scratch: We can't just walk in. Robotnik must be expecting us!
Sonic: Hmmm. You guys wait here!

[Sonic walks up to the front door. Inside the fortress, the doorbell rings. Robotnik walks up to the door, and Sonic, now disguised as a doctor, opens it. He is holding a medical bag in his right hand.]

Sonic: Where is he? Where's the patient?

[Sonic walks in. Robotnik turns his head to face him. Robotnik gasps, and Sonic turns around.]

Sonic: Uh-oh! You sound pretty bad.

[Robotnik walks up to Sonic, who puts his medical bag down and pulls a chair out of it, which he unfolds.]

Robotnik: I do?

[Sonic sets the chair down.]

Sonic: Have a seat, please.

[Robotnik jumps into the chair. Sonic reaches into his medical bag and pulls out various tools. he then jumps towards Robotnik and holds a telescope in his left hand, which he looks through.]

Sonic: Hmmm.

[Sonic runs away, then comes back, holding a pair of pliers, which he grabs Robotnik's nose with.]

Sonic: Hmmm.

[Sonic is now holding a pair of scissors in his right hand and a test tube in his left. He cuts off a piece of Robotnik's mustache and catches it in the test tube. He runs away, and in the next scene, he is holding the test tube in his right hand and a beaker full of water in his left. He pours the water into the test tube and it boils.]

Sonic: Hmmm.

[Sonic runs back to Robotnik, carrying a blood pressure cuff. He puts it on Robotnik's left arm and squeezes the pump with his left hand, which inflates Robotnik's head.]

Robotnik: Hey, wait a minute!

[Sonic lets go of the pump and Robotnik's head deflates.]

Sonic: Okay, let's have a look at your tongue.

[Robotnik opens his mouth and Sonic uses both hands to pull on Robotnik's tongue. It is now stretched out several feet.]

Sonic: Uh-oh! Hmmm. Piles to wring of that.

[Robotnik growls unintelligibly, waving his arms.]

Sonic: What's that?

[Sonic lets go of Robotnik's tongue, causing it to reel back into his mouth. It slaps Robotnik's head, and Robotnik holds his nose with both hands.]

Robotnik [in a nasal voice]: Am I going to be all right, doctor?
Sonic: Just as soon as I tie up some loose ends.
Robotnik: Loose ends?

[Sonic ties Robotnik's mustache together. He runs to his medical bag, then pulls out a roll of bandages with his right hand. He uses them to cover Robotnik up, making him look like a mummy.]

Sonic: There. You can pay the nurse on the way out!

[Sonic runs away, losing his disguise in the process. He open's Robotnik's front door (which has a sign that says, NO SOLICITORS to its right side) with his right hand and whistles with his left. Scratch and Henrietta peek out from behind the rock and run up to Sonic. In the next scene, Sonic, Scratch, and Henrietta are all inside Robotnik's fortress.]

Sonic: Come on, Scra... I mean, Edgar. You're our only hope for stopping those machines!
Scratch: I can almost remember... Yes! The remote control was in his lab coat pocket!

[Sonic runs up to a coat hanger, which Robotnik's lab coat is hanging on. He reaches into the lab coat's back pocket with his right hand and pulls out a remote control.]

Sonic: All right! I got it!
Robotnik [heard offscreen]: You've got trouble, spine-puss!
Sonic: You're too late, Slowbotnik!

[Robotnik and Grounder come in through the doorway.]

Robotnik: Says who? You're dealing with an equal-opportunity villain, hedgehog! Grab the female!

[Grounder rolls up to Henrietta and turns his left drill into a net, which he uses to catch Henrietta with.]

Henrietta: Help! Edgar, Edgar, darling, save me!

[Stratch looks in shock]

Scratch: Huh?
[Scratch and Sonic run up to Grounder and Henrietta. Robotnik pulls a switch.]
Robotnik: Ugh!

[As soon as Scratch and Sonic reach Grounder and Henrietta, a wall of lightning bolts forms between them.]

Robotnik: One more step, and she's roast turkey! Right now, hand me the remote!

[Sonic pulls out the remote, which he is now holding in his left hand. Scratch jumps at Robotnik.]

Scratch: Yeow-hoo-hoo!

[Scratch is now holding onto Robotnik's left leg. Robotnik growls, struggling to get Scratch off his leg. Sonic runs up to Henrietta and pulls her out of Grounder's net.]

Robotnik: Get off me, you psycho!

[Robotnik finally manages to get Scratch off his leg and launches him into the air.]

Scratch: Whoa! Whoa-ho-ho-ho!

[Scratch slams into a wall.]

Scratch: Ugh!

[Six miniature versions of Scratch appear around Scratch's head and fly around it.]

Scratch: Where am I, master?
Henrietta: What's he mean, "Master"?
Robotnik: Sonic has my remote control! Stop him!

[Scratch runs towards Sonic. Sonic then presses a button on the remote, which sends a signal to Robotnik's machines. He then tosses the remote onto the floor, breaking it into pieces.]

Sonic: Ugh! Oops, guess it broke.

[Sonic grabs Henrietta's right arm with his right hand and runs out the window, with her in tow. Scratch and Robotnik run up to the window.]

Robotnik: No! He put the machines in reverse! They'll be coming here!

[In the next scene, Robotnik, Scratch, and Grounder are all looking out the window.]

Robotnik: Without the remote, I can't stop them!

[As Grounder talks to Robotnik, two of Robotnik's machines can be seen outside the window.]

Grounder: Uh, what should we do, your sneakiness?
Robotnik: Start packing! But not until I turn this dumb-bot into a toaster oven!

[Robotnik smacks Scratch's head with his right hand and runs after Scratch.]

Scratch [heard offscreen]: Oh! Oh-ho-ho! Ow! Ooh! Ow-how! Oh! Oh!

[Robotnik's machines roll up the hill towards Robotnik's fortress. In the next scene, at Farmer Peck's house, Farmer Peck, Mrs. Peck, Sonic, and Tails can all be seen sitting and rocking back and forth in rocking chairs.]

Farmer Peck: I can't thank you fellas enough! Those machines put everything back the way it used to be.
Sonic: Yeah. They did that at Robotnik's place, too.
Tails: Now his fortress is just a big hole in the ground.
Farmer Peck: There's just one thing wrong.
Sonic: What's that?
Farmer Peck: Poor Henrietta. That fool chicken broke her heart.

[Henrietta is sitting sadly on a rock.]

Henrietta: Oh.
Sonic: No prob! Sonic's on the job!

[Sonic winks his right eye at Farmer peck. Just then, a limousine pulls up near Henrietta. The front door opens, and a sloth-like driver runs out. He opens the back door, and the real Edgar Eagle runs out. He waves to Sonic with his right hand.]

Edgar: Hi, Sonic! We came as fast as we could. Ah!

[Edgar walks up to Henrietta and grabs her left hand with his right. Henrietta looks at him in surprise]

Edgar: Shall we... go for a walk?

[Henrietta looks lovingly at Edgar, and they walk away together.]

Farmer Peck: Say, isn't that the actor that plays Edgar Eagle on the TV?
Sonic: I just told him that Henrietta thought he was the handsomest eagle on all of Mobius.
Farmer Peck: By golly, Sonic, you think of everything.
Sonic: Yeah. Someday, I might even have my own TV show like Edgar Eagle.

[Sonic turns to face the viewers and winks his left eye at them.]

Sonic: We'll call it, "Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog"!

[The screen irises out on Sonic, ending the episode.]

Sonic Says[]

[Sonic is at the Mobius Airfield, holding a race. Edgar Eagle and Scratch are both standing near their Eagle-copters, and Tails, Farmer Peck, Mrs. Peck, and Henrietta are watching as Sonic walks up to the finish line, holding a checkered flag in his left hand.]

Sonic: The first contestant to fly around that piline and back,

[Sonic points to the piline in the distance with his right index finger. In the next scene, he is holding the flag in his right hand]

Sonic: Will be declared, the real Edgar Eagle! Go!

[Sonic waves the flag. Scratch and Edgar both jump into their Eagle-copters.]

Scratch: Oh!

[Scratch starts up his Eagle-copter without buckling his seatbelt first. He flies away first, while Edgar buckles his seatbelt. He flies after Scratch, who flies around the piline, and crash-lands at the finish-line, falling out of his Eagle-copter.]

Scratch: I'm Edgar Eagle!

[Edgar lands his Eagle-copter safely near Scratch's wrecked Eagle-copter. Sonic walks up to Scratch.]

Scratch: I won!
Sonic: Sorry, Scratch. You're disqualified. A real hero always wears his safety belt.

[Edgar unbuckles his seatbelt. Sonic points to the viewers with his left index finger.]

Sonic: That goes for you too, pals!
Transcripts

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