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Sonic Boom
Beyond the Valley of the Cubots (transcript)

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This is the transcript of the Sonic Boom episode, "Beyond the Valley of the Cubots".

[Scene: Tails' Workshop, day.]

Tails: Only a few more adjustments and the Auto Adjuster 3000 will be complete. Ugh, if only there were a machine to do this for me.
[Tails reaches for the table but does not find his shifting spanner.]
Tails: Huh? Where's my shifting spanner?
[Tails looks at his tool shelves, only to discover that they are all empty.]
Tails: My babies!
Lady Walrus: Welcome to my world.
[Lady walrus looks through the door and discovers Stratford is hanging on the edge of a palm tree.]
Lady Walrus: My baby!
[Lady Walrus rushes off.]
Tails: [To his Communicator] Sonic. It's urgent. Get over here!
[Sonic arrives immediately]
Tails: What took you so long? Some of my stuff's gone missing.
Sonic: Did you check under there?
Tails: Under where? [Sonic giggles] There's only one person evil enough to do this: Eggman! [Pauses and laughs] Oh, underwear. I get it.

[Scene Change: Eggman's Lair, day.]

[Sonic and Tails barge their way into the living room of Eggman's lair, breaking the door in the process.]
Dr. Eggman: Aw... I just repaired that door from the last time you broke it down!. You can't just buy evil lair doors at the corner store, you know. It's a special order!
Sonic: What did you do with Tails' tools?
Dr. Eggman: Tails' tools are missing? So are mine. They're getting braver.
Sonic: Who is?
Dr. Eggman: Eh... Never you mind. Get out of here. Scoot. I'll bill you for the door.
[Sonic and Tails exit the Lair.]
Sonic: I don't think Eggman is behind this. So I've come up with a foolproof plan to catch the real thief.

[Scene Change: Seaside Island, day.]

[Sonic places a screw-driver under a crate that is held up by a branch with a rope attached to it. Sonic is holding onto the rope.]
Tails: That's your plan?!
Sonic: What? This is how you catch stuff. Haven't you ever watched TV before?
Tails: Hmm...

[Scene Change: Eggman's Lair, day.]

[Eggman runs around the lab trying to find his tools. He looks inside a chute but there is nothing inside.]
Dr. Eggman: My worst nightmare has come true.
Orbot: The one where you're speaking in front of a conference of robots and you realize you're standing in a puddle of your own oil?
Cubot: And then you wake up and find out you oil the bed?
Dr. Eggman: I didn't want to say anything in front of that blue pineapple, but there's a band of renegade robots out there watching my every move, plotting against me. I bet they're behind the burglaries.
[Cubot looks at Orbot and circles his finger next to his head.]
Dr. Eggman: I can see you, you know. Robots are so stupid. Wait... Maybe that's my problem. I can't think like a robot.
Cubot: Where are you gonna find someone that CAN think like a robot?
Dr. Eggman: I'm sending you two on a mission to find where the renegades are hiding.
Cubot: We won't disappoint you.
Dr. Eggman: It's too late for that.

[Scene Change: Seaside Island, day.]

[Cubot tries to give directions to Orbot using a compass. They end up going around a tree.]
Cubot: So we take a left here, another left here.
Orbot: We're walking in circles. [Angrily snatches the compass] Give me that! Don't you even know how to figure out directions with a compass?
Cubot: That thing can tell us directions?
Orbot: You're hopeless. I'll show you the right way.
[Suddenly, Orbot and Cubot get caught in a net, hanging above a tree.]
Cubot: Oh no! We've been captured!
[Hat Cubot arrives first and looks up at Cubot. The rest of the Cubot prototypes arrive and look up too.]
Cubot: ...By the handsomest robots in the world!
[Bowtie Cubot releases the trap, freeing the two trapped robots.]
Hat Cubot: You look familiar. Have we met before?
Cubot: I don't know. Have you ever been to Gogoba Village?
Orbot: You're clearly both the same model robot.
Cubot: That's impossible! He has a hat!
Orbot: Oh...
[Orbot stands next to Hat Cubot, takes off his hat and shows it to Cubot. Cubot realizes what Orbot means. Hat Cubot puts his hat back on.]
Orbot: It would appear that he's a rejected prototype of you.
Patch Cubot: But what about me?
Orbot: You're a prototype as well.
Green Cubot: So then, what am I?
Orbot: You're also a prototype.
Glasses Cubot: But what about...?
Orbot: [Angrily steps in the middle] You're all prototypes of Cubot!
Hat Cubot: But I have a hat!

[Scene Change: Valley of the Cubots, day.]

Hat Cubot: We've been living here since we escaped from Dr. Eggman's Lair. After being programmed and tested we were deemed not good enough.
[A flashback shows Eggman dumping a Cubot prototype into a storage room. Glasses Cubot peels out a poster and finds a hole in the wall. He shows it to the others. Hat Cubot goes through the hole first. He pops out of another Eggman poster in the storage room.]
Hat Cubot: So we escaped and went into hiding so that Eggman couldn't dismantle us and recycle our parts.
[The flashback shows the Cubot prototypes escape through a tunnel into the open, with Hat Cubot coming out first.]
Hat Cubot: We never plan to come out of hiding, but Cutebot began to malfunction and we needed tools and electronics to fix her.
[Cutebot arrives and is malfunctioning, generating sparks. The sparks set a plant on fire.]
Patch Cubot: I'll put out the fire with this!
[Patch Cubot brings out a Disintegrator Ray and shoots the fire, making it worse. Cutebot runs for her life.]
Cubot: Don't use that! Use sand!
[Glasses Cubot shovels some sand onto the fire. With the help of Hat Cubot the fire extinguishes. They both gasp.]
Cubot: When you started as many accidental fires as I have, you get good at putting them out.
[Glasses Cubot and Hat Cubot look at each other, then at Cubot.]
Glasses Cubot: You mean, you learn from your mistakes?
Hat Cubot: No wonder Eggman stopped when he created you. You're the ultimate prototype.
Orbot: No, you imbecile. He's the finished version.
[All the Cubot prototypes gasp at Orbot.]
Glasses Cubot: Can you help us fix Cutebot?
Cubot: Hmm... Let me see.
[Cubot brings out a hammer and bangs Cutebot's head with it, making her even shakier.]
Cubot: Her condition is worse than I thought. Maybe Dr. Eggman will know what to do.
Hat Cubot: If Eggman finds us, he'll toss us into the metal crusher and scrap us!
Cubot: Yeah. That sounds like him. All right. Er. I got nothing.
Orbot: Perhaps we should visit Tails. He'll know how to fix Cutebot.
Cubot: Yeah! Let's do that!
Hat Cubot: What a great idea to use Orbot's idea! You are a genius!
[Orbot drops his jaw.]
Cubot: Come on everyone, follow me!
[Instead of following Cubot, The Cubot prototypes scatter in different directions, leaving Orbot and Cubot on their own.]

[Scene Change: Seaside Island, day.]

[A rabbit sniffs at the screwdriver and runs away. Sonic and Tails are sleeping, but Cubot wakes Sonic up.]
Cubot: [Off-screen] Ahem.
Sonic: What, who, what, huh?
Cubot: Did we wake you?
Sonic: No, no. I was just resting my eyes.
[Sonic wakes up Tails.]
Tails: What, who, what, huh? I'm up.
Orbot: Yes, very convincing. Look. If we all pretend that you weren't sleeping will you help us?
[Tails gets confused, and looks at Sonic, who confused too.]

[Scene Change: Valley of the Cubots, day.] [Tails is seen repairing Cutebot, screwing a screw in.]

Tails: Just one more minor adjustment...
Green Cubot: Don't you wish there was a machine to do that for you?
Tails: Testify brother.

[Tails completes the repairs of Cutebot. She turns around and hits her head on a rock and collapses.]

Glasses Cubot: Holy cow! She's better than ever. [Gives a box of tools to Tails] I think these may be yours. We, err... ahem, found them in the woods.
Tails: My babies! Don't worry. I kept your room exactly the way you left it.
Sonic: You guys don't have to steal stuff. If you need any more repairs, just ask. We'll be happy to help. And by we, I mean Tails.
[Sonic and Tails, with his box of tools, walk home.]
Tails: When we get home, I have ice cream. [Sonic gives Tails an odd look] I meant for you and me!
Orbot: I believe it's time for us to leave as well.
Hat Cubot: You can't! We need the ultimate Cubot to be our leader. He's so much smarter than the rest of us.
Orbot: In all fairness that's like being the healthiest item at Meh Burger.
Cubot: Exactly! That's why I have to stay!
[The other Cubot prototypes cheer at Cubot.]
Cubot: [Whispers] They're not the brightest.
Orbot: I see how it is. Very well. I wish you luck, but as for me, I shall return home to our beloved Dr. Eggman.
[The Cubot prototypes carry on cheering. Orbot leaves, as Cubot watches over him.]

[Scene Change: Eggman's Lair, HQ room, day.]

[Dr. Eggman is concentrating on his work.]
Dr. Eggman: Where have you imbeciles been?
Orbot: It's great to be home.
Dr. Eggman: Where's the other one of you? What's his name, Q-bert?
Orbot: Cubot chose to live among the renegades.
Dr. Eggman: [Turns his chair around] You found them? Cubot can't stay there. He...
Orbot: ...Represents the perfection of the Cubot Series?
Dr. Eggman: What?! No! I could never perfect the Cubot Series. I finally gave up and moved on to the Orbot Series. You're the perfect Cubot.
Orbot: Really?
Dr. Eggman: Don't be too excited. It's not much of an accomplishment. It's kind of like being the perfect Cubot. We've got to get him back. He knows too many lair secrets. We've got to destroy those renegades. Where are they?
Orbot: Um... I don't remember? All these renegade robot bases look the same.
Dr. Eggman: If only I implanted some sort of tracking device in you so that I can find out where you've been. Oh, wait. I did!
[Eggman grabs Orbot and plugs him into the tracking device machine. Orbot gets electrocuted.]
Dr. Eggman: I probably should've sprung for the wireless option.

[Scene Change: Valley of the Cubots, day.]

[The Cubot prototypes ask questions to Cubot.]
Hat Cubot: What's the meaning of life?
Cutebot: Teach me how to juggle.
Green Cubot: What does this self-destruct button do?
Cubot: Hah! Can you believe how dumb these guys are Orb--? Oh right.
[Green Cubot presses his self-destruct button, destroying himself. Sonic and Tails are trying to fix Glasses Cubot.]
Tails: Did another Cubot press his self-destruct button? [Hears another explosion and jumps] Oh come on, guys!
[Tails gasps, looks up and notices Eggman arrive in his Eggmobile while firing lasers.]
Dr. Eggman: Hello, boys. I'm back!
Hat Cubot: He'll destroy us!
[Eggman presses a button on his wrist controller. His Badniks and Burnbot emerge down from some rocks.]
Cubot: I know what to do. RUN!
[All the Cubot prototypes, Burnbot and Eggman stare at Cubot.]
Cubot: When I told you to follow me, ya all ran off. Now I tell you to run and you just stand there?! What's wrong with you guys?!
Sonic: We'll take it from here.
[Sonic and Tails engage in combat. With the Cubot prototypes being chased by the Badniks Sonic Homing Attacks a Bee Bot. With Cutebot being held by two Crab Bots, Tails swings and breaks both of them with his wrench. Meanwhile, Burnbot shoots lasers at two more Cubot prototypes. One of the lasers goes through Hat Cubot's hat. He takes a look at his hat, and sticks his finger through the hole before putting it back on. He turns round in fury. At the same time, two Motobugs fire lasers at Hat Cubot, but Tails flies him to safety. Cubot jumps out of the way of a charging Crab Bot, which breaks down on his throne.]
Cubot: I'm sorry for ditching you to become the king of these dopes.
Orbot: If it makes you feel any better, I've come to expect this sort of thing from you.
Cubot: Yeah. Me too. Can you believe Eggman is attacking me?
Orbot: It's not an attack. It's, um, a rescue mission and Dr. Eggman said he had to get you back because you're the perfect robot.
Cubot: [Sighs]
[Cubot looks at Eggman with tears in his eyes and hugs him from behind. Eggman loses control and presses the wrong button on his wrist controller, causing Burnbot to spin out of control.]
Dr. Eggman: Get off me you mechanical meskite!
[Eggman pushes Cubot off. Meanwhile, Sonic destroys a Bee bot. He gasps and notices Burnbot is spinning around. He seizes his chance and spins the robot's arms around, tangling the robot up.]
Dr. Eggman: Now look what you made me do. Retreat!
[Eggman flees on his Eggmobile with two Motobugs and a Bee Bot.]
Cubot: Farewell, my people! You will always be in my heart... But I gotta scram.
[Cubot leaves with Orbot. Hat Cubot takes off his hat.]
Sonic: Before Eggman returns, we need to move you all to a place where you'll be safe.
[Hat Cubot opens up his self-destruct button and presses it, destroying himself and flinching Sonic.]
Sonic: Relatively safe.

[Scene Change: Eggman Lair, HQ room, day.]

[Orbot and Cubot are sweeping the floor for an upset Eggman]
Dr. Eggman: When you're done with that polish my boots, you boot-polishers.
[Eggman walks away. Orbot and Cubot look at Eggman. Orbot then turns to Cubot]
Orbot: Welcome home, your majesty.