The Mobius 5000/Transcript

This is the transcript for the Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog episode, "The Mobius 5000".

Note: Scenes that were cut from certain reruns are highlighted in red,.

[The episode begins with a view of Andy Pandatelly, who is holding a microphone in his left hand, on the screen of Robotnik's control panel.]
 * Andy Pandatelly: Hi there, race fans, this is Andy Pandatelly, coming to you live from the Mobius 5000, the grueling round-the world road race, with a 10,000 Mobiums prize to the winner!

[''Robotnik is revealed to be watching from a table with a black and white checkered tablecloth on it, as well as a bowl of spaghetti and a glass of orange juice. The camera moves over to Scratch and Grounder, both of whom are wearing racing helmets. Scratch is in a chicken-shaped race car, and Grounder is holding a steering wheel in both his drills.'']
 * Scratch: Wow! 10,000 Mobiums! I could really feather my robo-nest with that kind of cash! Bwahaha! This bird's gonna come in first!
 * Grounder: Oh, wanna bet? I'm faster than you!
 * Scratch: You're on! Ready, set, go!

[''Scratch drives away, with Grounder racing alongside him. they turn clockwise around Robotnik's table and control panel. Robotnik is holding a fork in his right hand, which eats the spaghetti off off. He then knocks the bowl of spaghetti over when he sees Scratch and Grounder racing towards him.'']
 * Dr. Robotnik: Huh?

[Scratch and Grounder race towards Robotnik, who grabs the checkered tablecloth with both his hands.]
 * Robotnik: Stop!

[''Robotnik holds up the checkered tablecloth like a flag. Scratch squawks in fear as he and Grounder screech to a halt. They scream as they crash into Robotnik. As Robotnik gets up, Grounder gets up and chuckles nervously.'']
 * Grounder: Hi, your mercifulness! Uh, we were just getting ready to win you the big race today!

[Robotnik reaches into his mouth with his left hand and spits out one of the pieces of Scratch's race car.]
 * Robotnik: You piston-brains! I've got more important plans than winning that poultry prize! This race will give me the perfect opportunity to get rid of Sonic for good!

[Scratch and Grounder walk behind Robotnik and dust him off with both their hands and drills.]
 * Scratch: Great! Uh, how are we gonna do it?
 * Robotnik: You? Ha! I'm using professionals this time!

[Robotnik pulls out a note with his left hand and hands it to Grounder as the camera zooms in on him.]
 * Robotnik: I want you two to deliver this to the Porcupine Orphanage! And don't screw up!

[Grounder turns around.]
 * Grounder: Who, us? Ha ha! Screw up? Aw, don't be silly!

[''As Scratch tries to walk away, Grounder trips over the piece of Scratch's race car that Robotnik spit out earlier. He and Scratch scream as they fall, then they land on the engine of Scratch's race car, starting it up. They scream again as the engine drives them away. Robotnik watches as they crash through the door, then sighs in disdain.'']
 * Robotnik: Sometimes I think I would have been better off if I had a vacuum cleaner and a toaster for assistants!

[''Robotnik's mustache spins clockwise, and is used as a transition to the next scene, where a view outside Bruno's Billiard's and Chili Dogs Bar and Pool. Inside, Bruno and Tails are both about to play a game of pool, and are both holding pool sticks in their left hands.'']
 * Bruno: All right, squirt! First one to clear the table wins a dozen chili dogs!
 * Tails: Whatever you say,

[Tails and Bruno high-five each other with their right hands.]
 * Tails: Hippo man!

[Bruno pulls out a billiard ball with his right hand.]
 * Bruno: Ha ha! This magnetic ball will fix him!

[Bruno sets the ball on the pool table, and is now holding his pool stick in his right hand.]
 * Bruno: Uh, eight ball, corner pocket!

[Bruno hits the pool balls, but only the eight ball and the blue ball get stuck to it.]
 * Bruno: Hey, what gives?!
 * Tails: Tough luck. My turn!

[Tails flies into the air, and as he talks, he points at the pool balls with his right index finger.]
 * Tails: Hmmm. How bout' the three and the four ball in the corner, nine and eleven in the side, with the seven, two and thirteen in the back corners off a combination shot, knocking the one, three, five, and ten in the far pocket, and whatever's left on the other corner?

[Tails, who is now holding his pool stick in his right hand, lands as Bruno walks up to him.]
 * Bruno: That's impossible!
 * Tails: You wanna double the bet?

[Tails shakes his left hand with Bruno's right.]
 * Bruno: Done!

[''Tails hits the blue ball with his pool stick. It knocks the three, four, nine, and eleven balls into separate pockets, then it knocks the two and seven balls into separate pockets, much to Bruno's shock. The blue ball then knocks another eight ball into a hole, and rolls back to Tails, who is now standing atop the pool table. Bruno stares in shock.'']
 * Bruno: Are you sure this is the first time you played this game?
 * Tails: Yep, pay up!

[''Tails holds out his left hand. Bruno then snaps his right index finger and thumb. Roxy walks in, carrying a tray of chili dogs in both her hands. Tails picks up one with both his hands.'']
 * Tails: Mmmm! I'm gonna enjoy these!

[The blue ball unfolds, revealing it to be Sonic.]
 * Sonic: Don't forget my cut, Tails!

[Bruno points his right index finger at Sonic, who turns to face him.]
 * Bruno: Hey, that's cheating!
 * Sonic: Oh, no! I knocked those balls in fair and square!

[''Sonic points his right index finger at Bruno, then picks up the magnetic ball with both his hands and breaks it over Bruno's head. He opens it, and a magnet falls out.'']
 * Sonic: This is cheating!

[''The citizens of Mobius, one of whom is Wallace A. Ditso from "Sonic Gets Thrashed", laugh at Bruno. Tails and Sonic walk out of Bruno's, carrying chili dogs in their arms. The Porcupine Woman and the Porcupine children walk up to them.'']
 * Porcupine Woman: Sonic, you've got to help me!
 * Sonic: It'll have to wait till' after lunch!

[''Sonic shoves the chili dog he is holding in his mouth. He then reaches offscreen and grabs a chili dog with each hand. He shoves them in his mouth and wipes his mouth with his right hand, then burps.'']
 * Sonic: Okay, I can help you now.
 * Porcupine Lady: Dr. Robotnik is threatening to close down our orphanage if I don't pay him 10,000 Mobiums by tomorrow!
 * Sonic: Gee, I'd like to help you, but where am I gonna get 10,000 Mobiums?

[A TV is revealed to be in the window of Bruno's, and Andy Pandatelly is revealed to be on it.]
 * Andy: It's just two hours till' the beginning of the Mobius 5000! Stay tuned to see who'll win the 10,000 Mobium grand prize!
 * Sonic: I think we just found our 10,000 Mobiums!

[The screen transitions to the next scene, where a view outside Professor Caninestein's laboratory is shown as Sonic and Tails walk up to the entrance.]
 * Sonic: I know just the guy to build us the fastest car in the world!

[As Sonic and Tails walk in, Professor Caninestein is revealed to be at the sink and have his head covered in shaving cream.]
 * Sonic: Need some help?
 * Professor Caninestein: Yes! Do you see a nuclear-powered self-propelled multi-purpose hairstyling scissors and razor anywhere?

[Sonic looks around, then picks up the nuclear-powered self-propelled multi-purpose hairstyling scissors and razor with his right hand.]
 * Sonic: I think so!
 * Caninestein: Just press the little red button!

[Sonic presses the red button with his left index finger, activating the nuclear-powered self-propelled multi-purpose hairstyling scissors and razor.]
 * Caninestein: Then duck!

[''Sonic ducks, and the nuclear-powered self-propelled multi-purpose hairstyling scissors and razor cuts off the top of his top quill. It then flies towards Caninestein and buzzes around him. The shaving cream clears, revealing bandages underneath Caninestein's facial fur. Caninestein then swats at the nuclear-powered self-propelled multi-purpose hairstyling scissors and razor with a tennis racket he is holding in his right hand. The nuclear-powered self-propelled multi-purpose hairstyling scissors and razor dies down, and Caninestein chuckles nervously as he looks at his reflection in a mirror he is holding in his left hand.'']
 * Caninestein: Still got a few bugs in it.
 * Sonic: Bugs?

[The nuclear-powered self-propelled multi-purpose hairstyling scissors and razor jumps an lands near Sonic.]
 * Sonic: Pirahnas is more like it!

[Caninestein stomps on the nuclear-powered self-propelled multi-purpose hairstyling scissors and razor with his left foot.]
 * Caninestein: Down, boy! Down!

[Caninestein stomps on the nuclear-powered self-propelled multi-purpose hairstyling scissors and razor with both his feet.]
 * Sonic: I need your help, Professor Caninestein!
 * Caninestein: What can I do for you, Sonic?

[Sonic points his right index finger at Caninestein.]
 * Sonic: I need to win the Mobius 5000!
 * Caninestein: Ah, is that all?

[''Caninestein turns and walks towards a drawer. He opens it with his left hand and pulls out a space warp straightener with the same hand.'']
 * Caninestein: I thought you were going to want something complicated, like a space warp straightener!

[''Caninestein presses the blue lever with his right index finger. The space warp straightener fires green rings at his face, twisting it.'']
 * Caninestein: Ah, these little babies are hard to come by, you know!

[''The space warp straightener stops. Caninestein walks up to a shelf of blueprints and grabs one of then with his left hand.'']
 * Caninestein: Just happen to be working to be working on a super all-terrain vehicle in my spare time! Shouldn't take more than a few months to biuld it!

[Caninestein walks up to Sonic, who looks over the blueprints.]
 * Sonic: Looks like you've got all the necessary parts! Don't go away!

[Sonic runs, and builds the wheels and axle for Caninestein's all-terrain vehicle.]
 * Sonic: Now, to make a few asthetic modifications!

[''Sonic runs again, building the rest of the all-terrain vehicle in the process. He then sighs.'']
 * Sonic: Took a little longer than I figured, but I think it was worth the wait, don't you?

[The screen transitions to a view of the staring line of the Mobius 5000, which all the race cars are behind as the audience cheers.]
 * Andy: Welcome, race fans, to the Mobius 5000!

[''Sonic, Tails, and Caninestein are all inside the ATV, and are wearing racing helmets. Sonic is behind the wheel, which he is holding in his left hand, and pulls the lever with his right hand. The all-terrain vehicle sprouts a right arm, which it uses to pick up a barrel of gas and pour it in its mouth. It then tosses the barrel aside.'']
 * Sonic: Boy, she really is a gas guzzler!
 * Caninestein: Yeah, but she's fast! Nothing on Mobius can beat her!

[Unknown to Sonic, Tails, and Caninestein, Robotnik has been watching them from behind a pile of tires.]
 * Robotnik: That's what he thinks!

[Robotnik is now holding a microphone in his left hand, and speaks into it.]
 * Robotnik: Race bots, is everything ready?
 * Scraper: Scraper ready!

[Scraper rolls up to Wallace's car and flattens it.]
 * Scorpion: Scorpion ready!

[''Scorpion stings the car on his right with his tail, melting it, then rolls away. The camera moves over to Speedo.'']
 * Speedo: Speedo ready!

[''Speedo gears up, leaving a trail of dust behind him. The camera moves over to the car behind Speedo, which is now blinded by the dust.'']
 * X-Moto: X-Moto ready!

[X-Moto pops a wheelie as he gears up, then as he moves forward, he smashes the car in front of him.]
 * Robotnik: Excellent! Have you got your programming straight?
 * Scraper, Scorpion, Speedo, and X-Moto: Destroy Sonic!
 * Robotnik: Right!
 * Andy: The cars are in position!

[''The Porcupine Woman and the Porcupine Children all wave at and cheer for Sonic. Sonic, Tails, and Caninestein all wave their right arms back at them. X-Moto rolls up to Sonic's all-terrain vehicle and sprays a can of rubber salt lick at them with his left hand.'']
 * X-Moto: This rubber salt lick'll fix him!

[''X-Moto laughs evilly as he backs away. The Rabbit Gardener from "Lovesick Sonic" is at the starting line, holding the racing flag in his right hand, which he waves.'']
 * Andy: And the race is on!

[''Scraper, Scorpion, Speedo, and X-Moto all drive away together. The Rabbit stares in shock and screams as they run over him. Sonic tries to drive his ATV past the starting line, but the rubber salt lick holds it back. Scratch and Grounder walk up to it.'']
 * Scratch: Bwahaha! It's not working! I knew those dumb Race Bots couldn't mess up Sonic as good as we could!

[The rubber salt lick launches Sonic's all-terrain vehicle back.]
 * Grounder: Unfortunately, they can do as good a job messing up us!

[''Scratch and Grounder stare in shock and scream as Sonic's ATV flattens them. It then crashes through a wooden barrier and breaks free of the rubber salt lick.'']
 * Tails: Do you get the feeling someone doesn't want us to win this race?
 * Sonic: Yeah, and I get a stronger feeling that someone is Robotnik!

[Sonic, Tails, and Caninestein all climb out of the ATV.]
 * Caninestein: I'll jack up the car! You fellas grab the spare tires!

[Caninestein runs up to the back of the ATV and opens the trunk with his right hand.]
 * Caninestein: I'm sure I put that self-propelled tire jack in here somewhere!

[''Scratch and Grounder crawl out from under the car. Scratch looks up at Caninestein, then turns to face Grounder.'']
 * Scratch: Shhh!

[As Scratch and Grounder crawl out from under the ATV, Caninestein turns to face them.]
 * Caninestein: Aha! There you are! Must have fallen out of the trunk!

[''Caninestein walks up to Scratch and Grounder and scoops the former in his left arm, and a the latter in his right. He sets them down near the hole in the ATV a red arrow is pointing to.'']
 * 'Caninestein: A bit battered, but you'll do!

[''Caninestein is now holding Scratch in both his arms as he pushes Grounder's nose into the hole with his left foot. He puts Scratch's beak into the back of Grounder's head and jiggles him to get Grounder to lift the ATV. Tails pushes a tire towards Sonic with both his hands.'']
 * Tails: Your move, Sonic!

[''Tails grunts as he tosses the tire at Sonic, who catches it with both his hands. Sonic tosses the tire at the left side of the ATV, and walks up to it. He picks up a wrench with his left hand and four nuts in his right. He places the nuts on the bolts, and screws them in with the wrench. Tails then pushes another tire with both his hands and grunts as he tosses it. It lands on the right side of the ATV, and Sonic, who is now holding four nuts in his left hand and the wrench in his right, runs up to the tire. He puts the nuts on the bolts and screws them in with the wrench. He then sets the wrench down.'']
 * Sonic: All set! Get rid of the jack, Professor, and let's get juicin'!
 * Caninestein: Will do, Sonic!

[''Caninestein kicks Grounder with his right foot, and walks away. Grounder lowers the ATV, and Sonic drives it away. Scratch and Grounder scream as they fall and land with a thud. Grounder opens his chest compartment with his right drill and pulls out a cell phone with his left. He dials the numbers with his right drill.'']
 * Grounder: Hello? Robo Clamp? Send out a truck, quick!

[''Grounder puts the cell phone back in his chest compartment and closes the door with his right drill. A crane backs up to Scratch and Grounder, scoops them up with its hook, then drives away with them in tow. Andy is now in a helicopter, holding the steering stick in his right hand and the microphine in his left.'']
 * Andy: The drivers are heading out of the city towards some pretty rough terrain! Rocket Robin in car number 17 is in the lead!

[''Scraper drives behind Rocket Robin, who screams as he pushes him off the road and into a lake. Scraper stops to look over at Rocket Robin.'']
 * Scraper: Not anymore!

[Scraper drives away.]
 * Caninestein: Looks like Robotnik's race-bots aren't exactly courteous drivers!

[As Sonic talks to Caninestein, he pulls the lever back with his right hand.]
 * Sonic: Remember, its not whether you win or lose, but how you juice the competition!

[Sonic drives his ATV alongside Scorpion.]
 * Tails: But we have to win, or Robotnik will close the orphanage!
 * Sonic: No prob! We'll juice the competition and win!

[Robotnik is revealed to be watching the race from the control panel in his fortress, and is wearing a race helmet while holding a steering wheel in both his hands.]
 * Scorpion: Scorpion to Dr. Robotnik! Scorpion to Dr. Robotnik!
 * Robotnik: What is it?
 * Scorpion: Sonic is right behind me! What are your orders?
 * Robotnik: Plan A!
 * Scorpion: Right!

[''Scorpion opens his trunk, and lays out a trail of thumbtacks. Tails points at them with his right index finger.'']
 * Tails: Sonic! Look out for those thumbtacks!
 * Sonic: No prob, little bud!

[''Sonic pulls the lever with his right hand, and a magnet rises from the ATV. The magnet attracts the thumbtacks, pulling them off the road.'']
 * Sonic: Now to reverse polarity...

[''Sonic pushes the lever and the magnet launches the thumbtacks at Scorpion, who groans in pain. Scorpion then turns to face Sonic.'']
 * Scorpion: All right, hedgehog! If it's stingin' you want, it's stingin' you'll get!

[Scorpion zaps Sonic's ATV with his tail.]
 * Tails: I don't think we can take too many more of those stingers!
 * Sonic: We won't have to! Hang on!

[''Sonic drives past Scorpion and off the race track, onto some rocky terrain. Scorpion chases after him, and tries to zap his ATV with his tail, but misses. Sonic then drives under some power lines, and Scorpion gets his tail caught in them. The power lines electrocute him and he screams in pain. Robotnik stares in shock, then the lights go out in his fortress.'']
 * Robotnik: Teriffic! He shorted out the power! Better turn on the emergency generator!

[Robotnik wanders around his darkened fortress.]
 * Robotnik: I just hope the exterminator got rid of those rat traps!

[''Robotnik steps in a rat trap and screams in pain. Andy is now flying his helicopter over the Frozen Faller Region as Sonic and Scraper drive underneath him.'']
 * Andy: The drivers are comin' out of the mountains and heading towards Mobius Frozen Faller Region!

[Tails points ahead with his left index finger.]
 * Tails: A thousand miles of ice ahead!
 * Caninestein: Better pull out the automatic chains!

[''Caninstein presses a red button with his left index finger, and snow chains appear over the ATV's tires. Scraper follows behind the ATV.'']
 * Scraper: Scraper awaiting instructions! Over!
 * Robotnik: Proceed with Plan B!

[Scraper stops.]
 * Scraper: Roger!

[Scraper hits the ice with his blades, and cracks form in it.]
 * Caninestein: What's that?

[Tails turns around.]
 * Tails: Oh no! The ice is splitting open!

[Cracks form in the ice.]
 * Sonic: Better switch this baby into overjuice!

[Sonic pulls the lever back with his right hand, and the cracks that form in the ice miss the ATV.]
 * Tails: We just missed them!
 * Sonic: Maybe, but I don't think we're gonna miss it! Look!

[''The ice splits apart, and the ice mountain breaks into pieces. The ATV screeches to a halt, and Sonic, Tails, and Caninestein scream as the ice blocks fall on them, covering them up.'']
 * Scraper: Ha! Got him!

[Andy flies his helicopter up to the pile of ice blocks.]
 * Andy: Uh-oh! Sonic and his team are bured under a ton of ice! Will they be able to get free in time? Will they win the race? Will they be able to save the orphanage?

[Robotnik, who is wearing a red and blue striped party hat on his head, is watching from the control panel in his fortress, which now has power again.]
 * Robotnik: Will you shut up? You're spoiling my victory party! Yippie, I got Sonic!

[''Robotnik grabs a party horn with his right hand and blows into it. Balloons fall from the ceiling, and the screen fades to black.'']