No Brainer/Transcript

This is the transcript of the Sonic the Hedgehog episode, "No Brainer".

[Scene: Robotropolis.]
 * [Chuck sneaks around as hoverbots fly by. The moment the coast is clear, he makes a run for it to a pair of goblin statues. He walks up to one, pulls the head off, and sticks a note inside the hollow body, and once the head is back in place, he heads off. Sally was looking through a pair of supped up binoculars, monitoring a lighting fast Sonic as he goofs while dodging lasers. He even finds time to down a chilidog.]
 * Sally: [annoyed] I don’t believe it! Actually, I do believe it!
 * [She walks over to Bunnie and Dulcy.]
 * Sally: Ohhh! Sometimes that hedgehog makes me so MAD!
 * [Back to Sonic, as he’s continually dodging whatever the robots throw at him.]
 * Sonic: WHOA!
 * Hoverbot: HEDGEHOG. PRIORITY ONE. HEDGEHOG. PRIORITY ONE.
 * [Sonic takes cover inside an abandoned car, as the robots pass on by. He meets the others back at the safe spot in no time.]
 * Sonic: WAAAAY COOL!
 * [She’s tapping her foot.]
 * Sonic: Sorry I’m late, Sal, but I hadn’t--
 * Sally: Sonic, I cannot believe that you would jeopardize our mission for a stupid chilidog!
 * Sonic: A chilidog? Moi!? [Belch] Oops...
 * Sally: Don’t tell me you forgot to check the blind drop?
 * Sonic: Ooooh-K
 * Sally: OK WHAT!?
 * Sonic: I won’t tell you I forgot to check the blind drop- AHAHAHAH! Chill, Sal! I’ll be back in a flash!
 * [In seconds, he’s gone at the drop off, note in hand, and back again. Sonic starts juggling the note around.]
 * Sonic: Am I cool, or what?
 * [Sally grabs it.]
 * Sonic: Heeey!
 * Sally: You’re “what”? ...Oh my gosh, listen to this, “Cancel mission, Robotnik has moved roboticizer. When I find out where, I’ll let you know.”
 * Sonic: Man, that drags big time!
 * Bunnie: What now, Sally-girl?
 * Sally: Wha.. Go back to Knothole and wait.
 * Sonic: Not my best event. You guys go ahead, I’ve got some stuff to do!
 * Sally: Sonic, you’re not going after another chilidog!
 * Sonic: Chilidog? Moi? Heheh! Silly girl...

[Scene Change: Robotnik’s lair.]
 * [Snively was sitting in the boss chair.]
 * Snively: And be sure to replace the paper towels with those soft ones I like!
 * Monitor: YES SIR.
 * Snively: Ahhhh...decisions, decisions….
 * [A mechanical hand reaches out and spins the chair around. Snively gasps as his uncle pulls him out of his chair by the collar.]
 * Snively: Uh...Good evening, sir!
 * Dr. Robotnik: Listen closely, Snively. I’m leaving now to eradicate that little freedom fighter uprising in the Northern frontier....
 * Snively: Very good, sir.
 * Dr. Robotnik: And while I’m away, I want you to take care of things, or you’ll end up as the paperweight I always wanted... UNDERSTOOD!?
 * Snively: PERFECTLY SIR!
 * Dr. Robotnik: GOOD!
 * [He throws Snively back into the seat.]
 * Snively: Ha- Have a nice trip, sir! [Mumble] Miserable toad...

[Scene Change: Robotropolis]
 * [Sonic finds a chilidog vending machine, gives it a smack, and out pots a fresh chilidog, which must be immune to age and decay...]
 * Sonic: Get along, little doggie! The hedgehog is HUUUUNGRY! Through the teeth, and past the ‘ol gums, look out tummy, here it-!
 * Swat-Bot [off screen]: KEEP MOVING. KEEP MOVING.
 * [Sonic stops, and looks through a type of vent cover, and sees a group of Mobians that have been captured by the Swat-Bots.]
 * Swat-Bot: ALPHA PATROL IN ROUTE TO ROBOTICIZER. REQUEST CLEARANCE.
 * Sonic: The Roboticizer...? Ohhh....
 * Swat-Bot: BREAKER-ECHO-RED-ZERO-ZERO-NINER.
 * [The Swat-Bots continue on. Sonic chows the food down, and makes his next move.]
 * Sonic: I’m outta here!
 * [He tries forcing open a man-hole cover.]
 * Sonic: Eh! NEH! Come on, metal-head! Oh, so you wanna play hardball, huh? Check this!
 * [He uses the buzz-saw move and forces his way through, making it back on to the main ground of the city, at the very gate he saw the Swat-Bots going through.]
 * Sonic: Hmmmm.... Now what’d that botbrain say?
 * [He thinks for a second, and snaps his fingers.]
 * Sonic: There you go! Breaker echo red, zero, zero, niner!
 * [The gate opens up, and he storms in, making it to the Roboticizer and the other Mobians are about to go inside it, as Sonic takes cover.]
 * Mobian: No! Please! LET ME GO!
 * [The glass pod drops down on the female Mobian.]
 * Tech-Bot: SPECIMEN READY FOR PHASE ONE ROBOTICIZATION.
 * Sonic: I don’t think so, pal.
 * [He speeds in, and starts circling a Swat-Bot.]
 * Sonic: YO- TIN HEAD! NEANER NEANER NEANER!
 * Swat-Bot: HEDGEHOG ALERT! HEDGEHOG ALERT! HEDGEHOG ALERT! HEDGEHOG ALERT!-
 * Sonic: [while knocking two down] EXCUSE ME! Mondo rude!
 * [The guards are out, and the Mobians are safe.]
 * Sonic: Go for it guys!
 * [They run for it, as Sonic stays behind.]
 * Sonic: Hey, wanna boogy? You’re ugly, and so are all your friends!
 * [He’s dancing on the control pad, and shuts down the Roboticizer, as Snively watches.]
 * Tech-Bot: ROBOTICIZER OFF LINE. ROBOTICIZER OFF LINE. ROBOTICIZER OFF LINE. ROBOTICIZER OFF LINE.
 * Snively: FOOLS! MUST I DO EVERYTHING!?
 * [Sonic’s trying to help the Mobian still stuck in the glass pod.]
 * Sonic: Hang on! We’re outta here in a Sonic sec!
 * [A Tech-Bot heads to a small door and pulls out a remote device.]
 * Tech-Bot: HEDGEHOG ALERT. HEDGEHOG ALERT.
 * [It presses a button, firing test shot, just as Sonic opens up the pod, and she makes a break for it.]
 * Mobian: Thank you, Sonic!
 * [Sonic’s just about to follow her, but the Tech-Bot zaps him... and he begins stumbling around.]

[Scene Change: Robotropolis.]
 * [Snively is driving in a hovercraft.]
 * Snively: You hit him with a memory scrambler?
 * Tech-Bot: CORRECT. ABILITY OF TEMPORARY MEMORY LOSS: 99.9 PERCENT.
 * Snively: Excellent... Where is the hedgehog now?
 * Tech-Bot: SUBJECT HAS EXITED FACILITY. LOCATION UNKNOWN. UNKNOWN.
 * Snively: AAAAUUUUGHHH!
 * [But as luck would have it....]
 * Snively: Well well! What a lovely site….
 * [Sonic is spotted walking in place out on the streets. Snively lands his ship, and checks this out.]
 * Snively: You there! What’s your name...?
 * Sonic: I... Don’t know...
 * Snively: Well... not to worry, friend. You’re with me now... Eheheh [cough] hmmm...

[Scene Change: Knothole, Sally's Hut.]
 * Sally: [off screen] Ohhh... I just know something’s happened. He’s never been this late!
 * [Sally’s pacing back and forth and Bunnie’s lying on the bed.]
 * Bunnie: [Yawn] Now Sally-girl, that Sugar-hog can take care of himself.
 * Sally: You’re probably right, Bunnie. I just-
 * [Suddenly, they heard the noise outside.]
 * Sally: What’s that!?
 * [Dulcy comes forth, crash landing to Sally's hut.]
 * Dulcy: Ooooooh- Hello, Ma. I’m home!
 * Sally: Ducly! Did you see anything?
 * Dulcy: Oh sure! I saw an owl, some trees... and, uh...
 * Sally: Sonic!? Did you see Sonic!?
 * Dulcy: Sooorry... I looked everywhere, too.
 * Sally: [sigh] Something’s really wrong. I gotta tell Uncle Chuck.
 * [She calls a messenger bird over and gives it a note.]
 * Bunnie: It’ll be alright, Sally-girl. We’ll find him!

[Scene Change: Robotnik’s Fortress.]
 * [Snively shows a holograph video of everything that just happened.[
 * Snively: Princess Sally! She is the leader of the Freedom Fighters! A band of trouble makers...remember?
 * Sonic: Sally...trouble maker...Got it.
 * Snively: You infiltrated this group to bring me information! You are Sonic the Hedgehog, and I- I am SNIVELY THE GREAT!
 * Sonic: You are Snively the Great...

[Scene Change: Robotropolis.]
 * [The messenger is flying around and eventually finds Chuck, giving him the letter.]
 * Uncle Chuck: Hmmm...I don’t like the sound of this...
 * [He meets up with Sally, Bunnie, and Dulcy.]
 * Uncle Chuck: Any news?
 * [Sally just shakes her head.]
 * Uncle Chuck: Well, there’s one place we haven’t checked. The holding room.
 * Bunnie: The holdin’ room? What in the world?
 * [As they talk, Dulcy spots a Stealth-Orb and knocks it to the ground.]
 * Uncle Chuck: It’s where Robotnik keeps the prisoners waiting to be roboticized.
 * Sally: Oh no....
 * Uncle Chuck: I’ll check it out.
 * Sally: No Uncle Chuck! We’ll check it out!

[Scene Change: Holding Room.]
 * Tech-Bot: Identification. Proceed.
 * [Chuck and Sally, disguised as Tech-Bots, are able to stroll right in, but all they can find is an empty cell.]
 * Uncle Chuck: These were full yesterday.
 * Sally: W-what... what if Sonic’s already been roboticized?
 * Uncle Chuck: I would have heard. Robotnik would never have kept that a secret.
 * Sally: Then where is he?
 * [Off screen Sonic and Snively were heard, laughing.]
 * Snively: Ha-here’s another one; “How many worker bots does it take to change a light bulb?”
 * Sonic: Hehehh- I don’t know!
 * Snively: ALL OF THEM!
 * [They laugh and laugh at the hilarious joke, as Sally and Chuck witness it. Sonic and Snively walk outside.]
 * Snively: Just go to North! Knothole is somewhere in the Great Forest! When you find it, radio back the coordinates!
 * [He sticks a radio in Sonic’s backpack.]
 * Sonic: Gotcha, pal!
 * [Sally and Chuck are watching the whole thing.]
 * Sally: What have they done to him?
 * Uncle Chuck: Some kind of mind control. Go back to Knothole and warn the others. I’ll snoop around here.
 * [She nods.]
 * Sonic: You say I can run... fast?
 * Snively: Extremely fast.
 * Sonic: But how do--
 * Snively: Trust me, friend! Now go find Knothole....
 * [He starts twirling his feet, and before he knows it...]
 * Sonic: WHA-WHAH-WHOAHH!
 * Snively: NO, NO! THAT WAY!
 * Sonic: WHAHA-WHOAH!
 * [Cut back to Knothole, Dulcy is flying around with Bunnie and Sally.]
 * Bunnie: That’s it, Dulcy-girl! Keep it straight! Keep it straight!
 * Dulcy: Keep it straight.... Keep it straight....
 * Sally: [off screen] DULCY!
 * Dulcy: Huh!?
 * Sally: Watch were you’re going!
 * [She turns and sees an upcoming branch.]
 * Dulcy: Oh boy... UGH!
 * Bunnie: Hold on, Sally! I think we’re gonna land!
 * Dulcy: I’m coming home, Ma.

[Scene Change: Great Forest.]
 * [Sonic is tearing through the woods.]
 * Snively: [off screen] Where ARE you, hedgehog!?
 * Sonic: Somewhere in the Great Forest.
 * Snively: Keep going! A Freedom Fighter will find you! Trust me!

[Scene Change: Knothole.]
 * Sally: [off screen] -and Snively is using...some kind of mind control on Sonic, so he’ll reveal where Knothole is!
 * [Sally's relaying this info to a group of Freedom Fighters as they think about what they can do.]
 * Antoine: Eh-heh! I am always knowing that Sonic has spelled much big trouble.
 * Dulcy: CAN IT, ANTOINE!
 * Bunnie: Hey...where’s Tails?
 * Dulcy: In the lookout tower!
 * Sally: Oh my gosh! We gotta warn him!

[Scene Change: Lookout Tower.]
 * [Tails is looking around with a pair of binoculars, when he spots Sonic.]
 * Tails: Sonic! ALRIGHT! SONIC, WAIT UP!

[Sonic stops and gets deep in the sand.]
 * Sonic: Who’s there!?
 * Tails: Haha! Sonic, you’re back! We were worried about you!
 * Sonic: You’re...Tails...
 * Tails: Of course...Uh, are you Ok?
 * Sonic: Sure! Hey, wanna race to Knothole?

[Scene Change: Robotnik’s Lair.]
 * [Snively is listening closely to the conversation.]
 * Tails: [off screen] I can’t now, I’m on lookout.
 * Snively: Very good, hedgehog. Very good....
 * Sonic: Forget that! You’re with me!
 * Tails: Uuhh...Ok. But I get a head start!
 * Sonic: Wouldn’t have it any other way, big guy!
 * [He revs up his tails, takes flight, and their off! Dulcy arrives too late to warn Tails.]
 * Dulcy: Ugh! Too late, Sally! He’s gone!
 * Sally: [off screen] He’d never leave his post, maybe he’s with Sonic!
 * [Tails is at a hollow stump, as he jumps in.]
 * Tails: Hahah! Good-bye! Whhhaaaaahh!
 * [Sonic’s close behind him.]

[Scene Change: Robotropolis.]
 * Sonic: [off screen] Well, well.... Home sweet Knothole!
 * Snively: Bingo-Bingo-BINGO! Yehehes! Ready the assault force! Tonight, Snively the great DESTROYS KNOTHOLE! HAHAHAHAHaheh!

[Scene Change: Knothole.]
 * [The two are still racing...until they finally make it back to their home, just as Sonic trips near the end.]
 * Tails: Sonic, are you OK? You never fall!
 * Sonic: I guess I’m tired. I’ll just grab a nap.
 * Tails: A NAP!? You never take naps!
 * Sonic: Hey! Even hedgehogs need a little beauty sleep!
 * [He heads for a hut, and just as he’s about to open the door...]
 * Tails: Heheh! Yo Sonic, that’s Sally’s hut!
 * Sonic: Uhh...I knew that!
 * [He turns around and heads for the next door.]
 * Tails: And that’s Dulcy’s!
 * Sonic: Just testing ya, big guy! I’ll bet’cha don’t know which one is mine...
 * Tails: Of course I do! That one!
 * [He points to Sonic’s hut.]
 * Sonic: Right again, little buddy....
 * Tails: Weird.
 * [Sally and Dulcy are heading back, when they meet Tails.]
 * Sally: Tails, have you seen Sonic?
 * Tails: He’s taking a nap. I didn’t know Sonic took naps....
 * Dulcy: That’s ‘cause he’s not the real Sonic.
 * Tails: Whad’ya mean?
 * Sally: Dulcy, you explain it.

[Scene Change: Sonic’s Hut.]
 * Sonic: Yo, Snively the great! My main man! This is Sonic, over?
 * Snively: [through radio] Greetings, my friend! I assume you’ve rounded up the Freedom Fighters?
 * [Sally rushes to Sonic's hut, and hides outside the window.]
 * Sonic: Ehhhh...not exactly.
 * [Snively is back in his hovercraft, flying near the Great Forest.]
 * Snively: Now listen, you incompetent little- dah, I mean, Sonic, Sonic, dear, dear boy...Time is of the essence here! I’ll be in Knothole shortly, and I want those Freedom Fighters rounded up!
 * Sally: [Gasp]
 * Snively: Get to work, ehehm...buddy! Over and out!
 * [Bunnie is pushing up a dummy tree-stump, revealing a small hide-out.]
 * Sally: Hurry! Snively’s on his way, and we got to get Sonic back to normal...Somehow!
 * Antoine: Because of why!? It is to his blame that we are in this terrible trouble, so I--
 * Sally, Dulcy, Tails, and Rotor: SHUT UP, ANTOINE!
 * [Sonic is wandering around the woods.]
 * Sonic: SALLY! HEY!? WHERE IS EVERYBODY!?
 * [She jumps in and shuts the trunk.]
 * Sonic: HEELLOOOOO!
 * [Sally looks through a peephole, and sees Sonic looking up in the sky at Snively’s hovercraft.]
 * Snively: We’ll soon see who will be a paper weight! HAH! Is he in for a large surprise.
 * [Chuck has snuck on board. He peeks out of hiding to look around, only to duck back when a Tech-Bot comes his way.]
 * Tech-Bot: POWER BOOSTER ADDED, SIR.
 * [Snively is messing with the memory scrambler.]
 * Snively: Perfect! The Freedom Fighters will never know what hit them! PREPARE TO LAND!
 * [The ship lands, and Snively puts on...the stupidest looking helmet you’ll ever see.]
 * Snively: Prepare, Freedom Fighters, to kiss the feat of Snively the Great!
 * [Snively and a couple of Swat-bots take off on a series of hover pads, allowing Chuck to get out of the ship unnoticed. As Snively meets up with Sonic...]
 * Snively: THEY DID WHAT!?
 * Sonic: Disappeared! The whole joint is empty!
 * Snively: Then they're hiding somewhere! ACTIVATE HEAT SENSORS!
 * [The Swat-bots start looking for the Freedom Fighters.]

[Scene Change: Hideout.]
 * Uncle Chuck: And Snively’s planning to use a memory scrambler on all of you, like he did with Sonic!
 * Dulcy: A memory scrambler?
 * Uncle Chuck: It temporarily erases your memory.
 * Sally: For how long?
 * Uncle Chuck: I’m not sure...but we can bring him out of it with a power ring!
 * Sally: That’s a problem. The next one is due in two minutes, we’ll never make it!
 * Tails: I can make it, Aunt Sally!
 * [And without any further discussion, Tails flies out of there with Chuck and Sally tagging along...and just as the ring reaches comes out, Tails snags it.]
 * Uncle Chuck: That’a boy, Tails!
 * Sally: Good job, honey!
 * [She kisses him on the cheek.]
 * Tails: EEEEWWWW! Aunt Sally!
 * Sally: We need you to do one more thing, Tails...Are you up to it?
 * Tails: No problem!
 * [Snively, Sonic and the Swat-Bots are closing in on the hiding spot.]
 * Antoine: What is it you are seeing, Dulcy?
 * Dulcy: Antoine, put a cork in it!
 * Antoine: Ah, wee, wee, wee! I can do that!
 * [The Swat-Bots locate them.]
 * Dulcy [off screen] Uh oh!
 * Snively: BINGO! BINGO! YOU HAVE FIVE SECONDS TO COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP! One... Two... Three... Four! FIVE!
 * [The stump opens up, and everyone comes out.]
 * Antoine: Oooh! Uh, what a great pleasure I am to see you, Mr. Snibbly! Ah, yes, yes... You know... I am being ‘eld prisoner against mai will, and I--
 * Snively: WHERE IS PRINCESS SALLY!
 * Dulcy: Wouldn’t you like to know, shrimp-boat!
 * Snively: Very well... BIG MOUTH! TAKE THAT!
 * [He zaps her with the scrambler.]
 * Dulcy: EUGGGH! Hi ma, I don’t remember a thing....
 * Sonic: How’s it going, pal?
 * Snively: Hedgehog...Find the princess, NOW!
 * Sonic: No problem, bud!
 * [He races off.]
 * Snively: This is x-ray leader, launch delta brovo! Repeat, launch delta brovo!
 * [A series of air crafts are launched into the air, then we cut back to Sonic running through the woods.]
 * Tails: [off screen] SONIC!
 * [Sonic trips.]
 * Sonic: WHHOOOA! OOF!
 * Tails: Sally wants to see you, Sonic!

[Scene Change: Lake of Rings.]
 * Sally: Hello Sonic!
 * Sonic: Who are you?
 * Uncle Chuck: We’re your friends!
 * Sally: Come back to us, Sonic...You’re our leader!
 * Sonic: NO! Snively the great is my only friend!
 * Sally: Here! Catch!
 * [She tosses him the ring.]
 * Sonic: Huh!? What’s this...? Huh... Yeah... YEAH!
 * [He runs off and back.]
 * Tails: Here he comes!
 * Sally: Sonic, is it really you?
 * Sonic: The real deal, Sal!
 * Uncle Chuck: Now here’s the plan, Sonic. While Sally and I reprogram the stealth bots, you take care of Snively and the Swat-bots!
 * Sonic: No prob, Unc! Good luck!
 * [He begins to take off.]
 * Sally: Sonic! I’m glad you’re back.
 * [She gives him a kiss.]
 * Sonic: Me too.
 * [He runs off. Back to the others, Snively has them all under his control.... Except for one.]
 * Antoine: You know, I am thinking, Snibbely the great [kisses his feet] that this is not in my job descriptioning, nes-pa, and to be working [kisses his feet] pour vous I am too grateful...
 * Snively: QUIET, YOU LITTLE TWIT!
 * [He zaps Antoine.]
 * Antoine: EEP! Eheheheh, quando, quando, quando, EH-EHEH!
 * Snively: Alright you Freedom Fighters...who’s next!?
 * [Sonic races in.]
 * Sonic: YOU ARE, PAL!
 * Snively: WHAT ARE YOU- GUHH! Who...are you.
 * Sonic: I’m Sonic the magnificent!
 * [Sally and Chuck are inside the hovercraft, taking care of the Stealth Bots.]
 * Uncle Chuck: There! Delta Bravo, this is command! Return to base! Repeat, return to base!
 * Stealth Bot: CODE WORD REQUIRED TO ABORT MISSION. TARGET LOCKED ON. 60 SECONDS. 59. 58. 57.
 * Uncle Chuck: We need the mission abort code!
 * [Sally works on it at the monitor.]
 * Sally: Nothing... I’ve got it!
 * [Sally types in the codename, R-O-D-E-N-T.]
 * Uncle Chuck: That’s it! Delta bravo, this is command! Abort rodent! Repeat, abort rodent!
 * Stealth Bot: ABORT RODENT. ABORT RODENT. CONFIRMED. RETURN TO BASE.
 * Uncle Chuck and Sally: YES!

[Scene Change: Robotropolis].
 * Sonic: [off screen] Listen up, friend! This is Robuttnik!
 * [Sonic shows Snively a hologram of Robotnik.]
 * Sonic: A bottom dwelling, scum sucker who’s lower than a snake’s belly!
 * Snively: Robuttnik...Bottom dweller...
 * Sonic: Hey Unc, Snittly ever gonna get his memory back?
 * Uncle Chuck: Eventually. But don’t worry, he won’t remember were Knothole is, it was the ship's guidance system that got him there, and I’m taking that out right now!
 * Sonic: Cool!
 * Uncle Chuck: OK Sally?
 * [She’s putting some final touches on the keyboard.]
 * Sally: And that’s it! Knothole’s coordinates are in the Great Swamp!
 * Sonic: See ya, shrimp-boat!
 * Snively: Bye-bye old buddy- I mean, Sonic the Magnificent!
 * Dr. Robotnik: [off screen] SNIVELY!
 * Snively: Robuttnik! You bottom dwelling scum sucker!
 * [He jumps at Robotnik, who just bounces him off with his massive gut.]
 * Dr. Robotnik: Why I do believe that it’s…time for that paper weight I’ve always wanted. Any last words, Snively!?
 * Snively: Da- Sir! SIR! I-I FOUND- I FOUND KNOTHOLE!
 * Dr. Robotnik: You found Knothole?
 * Snively: Yes sir! Yes sir! And I can take you there, RIGHT NOW!

[Scene Change: Great Swamp.]
 * Dr. Robotnik: My patience...is wearing thin, Snively! Where is Knothole!?
 * Snively: Huh- Just a little farther, sir!
 * Dr. Robotnik: [Fighting off mosquitos] I do hope you’re right, Snively!
 * Snively: Weh- It’ll never happen again! I’m quite sure I know where it is! Just stick with me for another moment! It’s somewhere a little over here to right, maybe to the left! Just give me a...
 * Dr. Robotnik: It frightens me to think what would happen if you’re wrong....