The Last Resort (Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog)/Transcript

This is the transcript for the Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog episode, "The Last Resort".

[''The episode begins with a view of a field. The camera moves to the right side of the screen, where the city of Popodopolis is. A cloud of smoke emits from behind a building.'']
 * Mayor Fumfer: Ahem! Citizens of Popodopolis,

[''A view inside the city of Popodolopis is now shown as the citizens stare at an image of Mayor Fumfer on a television screen. As Fumfer talks, a laser beam fires past him'']
 * Fumfer: This is Mayor Fumfer Speaking. We are under a major robot attack!

[''Three robots, one of whom is a yellow version of Davy Sprocket from Dr. Robotnik's Mean Bean Machine, march through the streets of Popodopolis. A Poodle Lady screams as she stares in shock.'']
 * Poodle Lady: Robot attack!

[Fumfer points his right thumb at himself.]
 * Fumfer: As long as I am mayor, the robots will never take over this city!

[The three robots stop, and Fumfer points his right index finger at them.]
 * Fumfer: Uh, without a permit! All attacking robots have to fill out these forms first, in quadruplicate!

[''Fumfer pulls out a stack of forms with both his hands. A beam fires at the screen, which somehow destroys the stack of forms. Fumfer chuckles nervously.'']
 * Fumfer: Never mind!
 * Poodle Lady: We're doomed! Oh, if only Sonic the Hedgehog were here!

[The citizens of Popodopolis back up as Sonic runs between them and the robots.]
 * Sonic: You called? I heard you have a few...

[Sonic turns to face the robots, then stares in shock at them and trembles.]
 * Sonic: Huge robots you need taken care of!

[The Orange Robot points his left index finger at Sonic.]
 * Orange Robot: You got a problem, pip-squeak?

[Tails flies up to Sonic.]
 * Tails: Whoa! Look at the size of em'!
 * Sonic: This is gonna be trickier than I thought!

[''The Orange Robot beeps, then opens his head. A satellite dish emerges from it and picks up a beam. It then lowers into the Orange Robot's body, and a white flag emerges from it.'']
 * Orange Robot: Halt! New orders! We give up! Attack cancelled!

[The Orange Robot's head closes, and he and the two other robots run away.]
 * Tails: They're retreating!

[Sonic scratches his head with his right index finger in confusion.]
 * Sonic: That's just plain weird! The only guy who could call off a robot attack like that is...
 * Dr. Robotnik: Attention, beloved citizens of Mobius!

[Sonic and Tails look up.]
 * Sonic and Tails: Dr. Robotnik!

[''Sonic, Tails, and the citizens of Popodopolis turn to face Robotnik, who is now on the screen. He is wearing a green sweater and holding a pipe in his right hand.'']
 * Robotnik: I appear today to make a historic announcement. I have decided to announce my retirement, effective immediately!
 * Sonic: What?
 * Tails: No way!

[Robotnik is in his fortress, sitting in a chair near the fireplace, and holding the pipe in his left hand as Momma Robotnik is pouring tea from a teapot she is holding in her right hand into some cups.]
 * Robotnik: Yes way! I hearby forsake all nefarious activites to live a life of devotion to my mother!

[The camera zooms out on Robotnik and Momma Robotnik.]
 * Robotnik: Poor dear, she's so old and feeble now, she can barely speak! In honor of my retirement, I'd like to present myself with this gold watch!

[Robotnik holds up a gold watch in his left hand.]
 * Sonic: Huh?
 * Robotnik: I had a little something engraved;

[Tears emit from Robotnik's eyes.]
 * Robotnik: To Dr. Robotnik, from Dr. Robotnik, with love.

[Robotnik wipes his eyes with his right index finger.]
 * Robotnik: How thoughtful of me!

[Robotnik tosses the watch aside, and it breaks.]
 * Robotnik: Well, goodbye, Mobius, I'll miss all the little people I trampled on the way out! That hedgehog! Hedgehog, you, Sonic!

[Sonic taps his left foot impatiently.]
 * Sonic: Yeah? I'm waiting!

[Robotnik covers his face with his right hand.]
 * Robotnik: I think I'll miss you most of all! Farewell, Mobius! And, uh...

[''Robotnik ducks, then emerges, dressed like a hippie. He holds up his left index and middle fingers.'']
 * Robotnik: Peace!

[Static appears onscreen, then a black screen with the words, STAY TUNED FOR COMING ATTRACTIONS in red letters.]
 * Sonic: What was that all about?
 * Tails: I don't know! Do you think he means it?
 * Sonic: Retirin' to spend time with Momma? I don't think so! Come on! Let's go find out what our old pal, Robotnik is really up to!

[''Sonic runs away, and Tails flies behind him. an image of Sonic spinning is used as a transition to the next scene, where Sonic and Tails are standing outside Robotnik's fortress as the camera zooms in on them.'']
 * Tails: You mean we just ring the doorbell? What if it's a trap?
 * Sonic: Then we escape!

[''Sonic presses the doorbell with his right index finger, and it rings. He then walks back to Tails.'']
 * Sonic: But this way, we'll know for sure if he's really retired!
 * Momma Robotnik: Boopsie, answer that infernal bell, it's giving me a headache!

[Sonic and Tails turn their attention to Momma Robotnik.]
 * Robotnik: Yes, Momma!
 * Momma Robotnik: And bring me some tea, and cookies, and-and fish cakes! And don't forget the hot water bottle!

[Sonic and Tails turn to face the front doors.]
 * Robotnik: Yes, Momma!

[Robontik opens the front doors with both his hands.]
 * Robotnik: Sonic the Hedgehog?

[Robotnik claps his hands.]
 * Robotnik: Oh, joy! Sonic the Hedgehog, my old nemesis!

[Robotnik chuckles, then turns to face Tails.]
 * Robotnik: And your little friend, Tails, too! What a pleasant surprise! Come in, come in!

[''Sonic and Tails turn to face each other, and their jaws drop to the floor. Robotnik puts his left hand on Sonic's right shoulder, and his right hand on Tails' left shoulder.'']
 * Robotnik: Can I offer you something to eat?

[''Robotnik picks Sonic and Tails up. In the next scene, Sonic, Tails, Robotnik, and Momma robotnik are all sitting at the table near the fireplace as the camera zooms in on them. Robotnik is now holding the teapot in his right hand.'']
 * Robotnik: Tea?
 * Tails: Sure!

[''Robotnik pours tea into Tails' teacup. He then holds the teapot over Sonic's teacup.'']
 * Robotnik: Tea?

[Sonic holds out his left hand like a stop sign.]
 * Sonic: No thanks!

[Robotnik chuckles.]
 * Robotnik: It's not poison, you know! The old Robotnik probably would have poisioned it, but now,

[A close-up of Robotnik's mouth is shown as he talks.]
 * Robotnik: I just love sharing a cozy hot cup of lapsang souchong tea!

[Robotnik overfills his teacup with tea, causing it to overflow.]
 * Robotnik: Boopsie, you nincompoop, you're spilling the tea!
 * Robotnik: Oh, I'm sorry, Momma! Here, I'll wipe it up for you!

[''Robotnik sets the teapot down on the table, and removes his sweater with both his hands, revealing a tattoo of a heart that says, MOM with a plunger going through it on his chest. robotnik is now holding his sweater in his right hand and uses it to clean the table. Sonic nods his head, "No", then gasps when he sees Robotnik. He then stands up and holds out his right hand like a stop sign.'']
 * Sonic: Okay, I've seen enough! Thanks for all the good times, Robotnik! It's been real!

[Sonic turns to face Tails.]
 * 'Sonic: Come on, Tails, we're out of here!

[''Sonic points his right thumb behind himself. Tails is now holding a fish cake in his right hand, and his teacup in his left!'']
 * Tails: Just a sec, Sonic, these fish cakes are pretty good!

[''Sonic grabs Tails by his left tail with his right hand and pulls him away, causing him to spill his tea, which is used as a transition to the next scene, where a view of a lake is shown. The camera moves to the right side of the screen, where Sonic and Tails are playing checkers near a fallen tree and a log cabin. Tails is about to make a move.'']
 * Sonic: You gonna make a move or what?
 * Tails: Okay! Oops, no!
 * Sonic: I'm waiting!
 * Tails: All right, already! There!
 * Sonic: Boy, this retirement stuff is for slow-mos!
 * Fumfer: Hello!

[Sonic and Tails turn to face Fumfer.]
 * Fumfer: There you are, I've been looking all over for you boys!

[Fumfer, who is holding the key to the city of Popodopolis in both his hands, walks up to Sonic and Tails.]
 * Sonic: Mayor Fumfer?
 * Fumfer: Greetings and felicitations, bored heroes! In thanks for saving our town, we gratefully present you with the key to the City!

[''Fumfer tosses the key at Sonic, which flattens him. Sonic grunts as he is hit.'']
 * Sonic (wearily): Gee, thanks!

[Fumfer reaches into his right pocket with his right hand and pulls out a pice of paper.]
 * Fumfer: And also this! That is, if you're interested.
 * Sonic (wearily): What is it?
 * Fumfer: Courtesy of the Last Resort travel agency, a Super Sonic action adventures thrill-seekers holiday tour package, uh, for two!
 * Tails: Cool-a-mundo! We'll take it!
 * Sonic: Sounds radical! What's the catch?

[Fumfer nods his head, "No".]
 * Fumfer: Uh, no catch, just a token of our gratitude for your years of fighting that terrible Dr. Robotnik!
 * Sonic: Nah, I don't think it's such a good idea! Robotnik could still be trouble!
 * Fumfer: But he's retired, hasn't he?
 * Sonic: Well, yeah, so he says, but I...

[Before Sonic can finish, Tails pulls on his right arm with both his hands.]
 * Tails: Aw, come on, Sonic! Robotnik's history! And you're goin' nutso just hangin' out all the time! You need a vacation!

[Sonic nods his head, "No".]
 * Sonic: I don't know...
 * Tails: Please?
 * Sonic: Okay, okay!

[Tails runs in place excitedly.]
 * Tails: Yahoo!

[Tails jumps into the air.]
 * Sonic: When do we leave?
 * Fumfer: Uh, your holiday begins... right now!

[As Fumfer continues talking to Sonic and Tails, a jet ski floats up to them.]
 * Fumfer: You'll water-ski aboird this auto-piloted, 220 bazillion horsepowered, fully equipped hydrofoil to the beautiful island resort of Sanpelagroso! Once there, your personal tour director will lead you on a two-day rendevous with adventure!
 * Sonic: Cool!
 * 'Tails: All right!
 * Fumfer: Uh, climb on board, boys!

[Sonic and Tails jump into the jet ski and drive it away.]
 * Tails: Thanks, Mayor Fumfer!

[Fumfer waves his left hand at Sonic and Tails.]
 * Fumfer: Bon voyage! Farewell! Goodbye, and good riddance!

[''Fumfer is now revealed to be a robot, and he opens his chest compartment with his left hand. He reaches in with his right hand and pulls out his Robocom phone.'']
 * Fumfer: Robot secret angent Fumfer here.

[Robotnik suddenly appears on the right side of the screen, holding his phone in his left hand.]
 * Fumfer: The hedgehog bought it, your malignancy! He's on his way to the island now!
 * Robotnik: Ah, excellent work, Fumfer! You're fired!
 * Fumfer: Fired? Why? I did my job perfectly!
 * Robotnik: Exactly! That's why...

[Robotnik turns to face Fumfer and points his right index finger at him.]
 * Robotnik: I don't need you anymore!

[''Robotnik somehow manages to push Fumfer away with his right hand. He then hangs up his phone and pushes the left side of the screen away with both his hands. He then turns to face his control panel and slams his left fist on it.'']
 * Robotnik: The most fabulously fiendish of my fiendish plots is hatched, and Sonic's little trip to the Last Resort will be the vacation to end all vacations!

[''Robotnik presses a button on his control panel with his right index finger. The screen turns on, revealing the coordinates of the Last Resort, which is an island with a skull and crossbones on it. Robotnik laughs evilly. The screen then transitions to the next scene, where Tails is now driving the jet ski, pulling Sonic, who is holding onto the rope handle with both his hands, and standing atop a surfboard.'']
 * Sonic: Yahoo!
 * Tails: Great vacation, huh, Sonic?

[Sonic spins.]
 * Sonic: Yahoo!

[''Sonic's top quill is now holding onto the handle. Sonic then grabs the handle with both his hands and leaps into the air. He stands on the surfboard with his left foot, then lands atop the water.'']
 * Sonic:I don't know why we didn't do this a long time ago, little bro!

[''Sonic laughs as the camera cuts to a view under the water, then down to a Jaws as it swims through the water. Scratch and Grounder are revealed to be in its control center, which takes place in its eyes.'']
 * Scratch: The hedgehog's overhead! Activate the tidal wave machine! Bwahahaha!

[''Scratch pulls the lever back with his left hand, and the top of the Jaws opens. The tidal wave machine rises from it.'']
 * Grounder: Cowabunga, dude!

[Grounder laughs as the tidal wave machine spins, creating a tidal wave that chases after Sonic and Tails.]
 * Sonic: Yes, Sir, this vacation gig is way past cool!

[Tails turns to face Sonic and gasps when he sees the tidal wave chasing him.]
 * Tails: Tidal wave!
 * Sonic: What?
 * Tails: Tidal wave!
 * Sonic: Try a wave?

[Sonic waves his right hand at Tails.]
 * Sonic: Sounds like a plan to me, little bud!
 * Tails: No, tidal wave!

[The tidal wave washes over Sonic and Tails, who manage to escape from it.]
 * Sonic: Whee! Tubular!

[Inside the jaws, Scratch looks down at his radar, which beeps.]
 * Scratch: D'oh, that miserable hegehog! Come on, we'll get him this time! Activate the hydrofoil biceptor blade!

[''Grounder pulls the lever back with his right hand. The top of the Jaws opens, and the hydrofoil biceptor blade rises from it.'']
 * Grounder: Slices, dices, and sinks hedgehogs!

[''Grounder laughs as the hydrofoil biceptor blade rises up. It slices through the middle of the jet ski, slicing it in half.'']
 * Tails: Uh-oh!

[Sonic surfs up to Tails, then sinks next to him.]
 * Scratch: Ho ho! It worked! Release the Choppers! Bwahahaha!

[''Grounder pulls the lever back with his left hand. The top of the Jaws opens.'']
 * Grounder: Aye-aye, Captain! Choppers away!

[Grounder laughs as a trio of Choppers swim up to Sonic and Tails.]
 * Sonic: Hey, Tails, remember those fish cakes we ate at Robotnik's?
 * Tails: Yeah?

[The three Choppers swim towards Sonic and Tails.]
 * Sonic: Well, it looks like it's our turn to be fish food!

[The camera zooms out on Sonic and Tails, and the screen fades to black.]